|
Note: this is my private collection of interesting/humorous .. stuff. read at your own risk:) "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!" words by Randy Farran, music traditional A dragon has come to our village today. We've asked him to leave, but he won't go away. Now he's talked to our king and they worked out a deal. No homes will he burn and no crops will he steal. Now there is but one catch, we dislike it a bunch. Twice a year he invites him a virgin to lunch. Well, we've no other choice, so the deal we'll respect. But we can't help but wonder and pause to reflect. Do virgins taste better than those who are not? Are they salty, or sweeter, more juicy or what? Do you savor them slowly? Gulp them down on the spot? Do virgins taste better than those who are not? Now we'd like to be shed you, and many have tried. But no one can get through your thick scaly hide. We hope that some day, some brave knight will come by. 'Cause we can't wait around 'til you're too fat to fly. Now you have such good taste in your women for sure, They always are pretty, they always are pure. But your notion of dining, it makes us all flinch, For your favorite entree is barbecued wench. Now we've found a solution, it works out so neat, If you insist on nothing but virgins to eat. No more will our number ever grow small, We'll simply make sure there's no virgins at all! 10/15/2005 PrincessAccaber: and btw, hardware is pretty fascinating probably talking about computer hardware;) Nonesuch1a: well, i always was a fan of tooth marks.. Nonesuch1a: do NOT quote me on that 10/31/05 Nonesuch1a: hahaha, yay belt welts ;) 1/12/06 Nonesuch1a: with proper restraints, we can redo the whole apartment just bleaching the carpet to match the curtains...;) Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again
bizzar Ithacation Students down at Harvard Succeed by grade inflation While little girls from Cornell Are out hoeing plantations And if you like walking up hills It must be Ithacation It's the edge of the world Far away from civilization The sun may rise in the East But here we'll never see illumination It's understood that Cornell Sells us Ithacation Bribe your TAs very well To get that special grading Weekend's here's, the frat is near, But the police are raiding First born unicorn Sleep is forlorn And dream of Ithacation Dream of Ithacaaation excelent funny stuff I seek words that if spoken, wont be on loan as i near the bridge broken, but my only one home I wish you stood waiting to take up my hand but you'll turn your back laughing and i'll understand Cause ive learned that behind me are infinite pasts and before me, another poured in that same cast. Like a deck of cards dealt every possible hand has been played and played out again and again And the knowledge comes hard that that one who still tries to warn those coming after to open their eyes Has their time only wasted for what do we change the cards have been printed we can but rearange Isn't everything shuffled still the same it was last? No! Remember that future look forth to a past That has never been written with no model 'fore cast where the latest card printed never will be the last. :) lost words All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king. --Tolkien "art is in nature. whoever can extract it, has it." --Albrecht Durer Ivy League mornings: Penn: give Bob the Bum a dime, check on transfer papers. Brown: smoke breakfast, say prayer for no grade system. Columbia: deep breath of smog, take taxi to class. Dartmouth: gargle moonshine, chop wood for heating. Princeton: yawn, feel like a geek, dress the part. Yale: floss, snort coke, come out of closet. Harvard: wake up, bathe in glow of undeserved rep. Cornell: roll over, sober up...cry more stolen stuffs:D NelLi1701: I think the FDA needs to put sleep on the list of narcotics and abused substances. Think about it, the more you sleep, the more sleep you want. And think of the horrible withdrawal pains you suffer when you go for extended periods of time without it once addicted. And look at the effect on your body! Other drugs will just make you hallucinate or feel good - sleep is so strong it actually knocks you unconscious!! And even better, you hallucinate while you're sleeping.... talk about the ultimate drug waiting to be abused.... I know I'm getting my fix right now. What alcoholic personality are you? i had to steal this from a friend's subprofile;) DREAMCATCHER5057: In Japan, Sony Vaio machines have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with their own Japanese haiku poetry: Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind. Both are blank. Three things are certain: Death, taxes, and lost data. Guess which has occurred. First snow, then silence. This thousand dollar screen dies so beautifully. Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and reboot. Order shall return. PRINCESSACCABER: Last month a worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge failure... In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant. In Eastern Europe they didn't know what 'honest' meant. In Western Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant. In China they didn't know what 'opinion' meant. In the Middle East they didn't know what 'solution' meant. In South America they didn't know what 'please' meant. And in the USA they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant. --The Times "If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." -C.S. Lewis life is a rummor but i forgot the details. it dies here Thank god elves are real;) Life is a cruel mockery of fiction -- we know every love every hate evey passion of a well-written character, but in life never come within even a hint of such understanding with eachother Whether you color within the lines or without, you still acknowledge the existence of the lines |
