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archived rants

07.18.2002
dumb idiot, please, look at your bill,
then call me

I once saw a bumper sticker that said, "I Hate Stupid People."  I have not seen that bumper sticker in a long time; however, I really want one.  People call me up at work and the first words out of their mouth are "I just opened my bill and I want to know why it is so high."  I then open their bill, go line by line and explain it to them.  I so want to say, listen you idiot, you could have answered your own question had you just read it, attempted to understand it, then called if you had questions.  But when you go over your minutes, and that is what this bill is about, then accept it, pay it, and watch how many minutes you use.  Seriously, you just wasted my time and yours.

Here's another one, I'm am on the phone, you try hooking your battery charger up to your phone and it will not make any type of connection, so you call me and state, "Is there a problem with the towers that my phone won't charge?"  Gee, let me think.  Wall to phone won't work.  Tower, through air, through smog, building walls, your knick knacks that make your trailer a cozy place to live is supposed to charge your phone.  NO.  Bring your phone to a store and have it looked at because there is evidently something wrong with it.  I cannot see through the phone, we aren't doing teleconferencing here, I can't be at your location in 30 minutes or less.  Take time out of your sitting in a lawn chair smoking a cigarette day to go to a store and see why some that you own doesn't work.

And one last though for this segment.  Be realistic people.  Do not expect your phone to work when you are five miles out in Lake Michigan.  Do not expect your phone to work when you are deep in the woods of Northern Wisconsin.  Do not expect your phone to work when you are in the middle of a steel building like an office building.  And here is a big one, Do NOT expect that your phone is going to work in a hospital.  Do not even call me.  Can you not read the signs when you go into the hospital that state to turn pagers and cell phones off.  There is a reason for it.  Do it.  Your call to the neighbor to let the dog out is not as important as someone's' life. 

So please, if anyone finds an "I Hate Stupid People" bumper sticker, e-mail me, and I'll pay ya for it.