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Survivor 2

Who Will Survive?

JQP Today and Grouch Tech would like to present the first-ever Lakeside Survival challenge. For the next 15 weeks, one subscriber will be ousted out of Mr. Bauer’s science room each week. This subscriber will be chosen by none other than Grouch himself. Along the way there will be special challenges and awards given out. The last survivor will win a fortune cookie furnished by JQP Today! To put it simply, there are no rules, send all the bribes you can with your name enclosed to locker number 402!! Good luck to all participants and always remember to appreciate this.

The First.

8-29-00. Tuesday after school he was the first. We instructed him with the rules and we gave him only four valuable items that he would need to get started in Mr. J. Bauer's Science Lab. He was given a balloon, a bottle of maple syrup, one package of Extra Large Farm Fresh eggs, and a 4 foot piece of bamboo. His name was Mike and he wasn't to bright when it came to surviving with Mr. Bauer for 1 week. When Mike was thrown into the room Mr. Bauer asked him, "What's the word today?", and Mike mumbled, "Huh?". That did it for Mike, Mr. Bauer then lectured him on being polite with his elders and then Mr. Bauer gave Mike a 400 Page Science Notebook to fill out and hand back in two days. Leafy, Grouch, and Josh (The Judges) couldn't stand Mike's poor performance anymore so Mike got ousted out of the competition. He made it 1 day, 2 hours. Making his record an easy one to beat. Remember, that the winner only needs to survive 7 days, till the next issue of JQP Today.

The Second.

It's impossible, you didn't even give me a pencil!"-Mike

These words were said to me after Mike was released from his prison. Is it really impossible? Probably. "Dude, No one can survive with bauer for an entire week." Mike continued. So, the comittee, comprized of Leafy, Grouch, and Josh, have decided to throw in two new survival utensils besides the Maple Syrup, The Carton of Eggs, the Balloon, and the 4-foot piece of Bamboo, we will grant the survivors 30 feet of twine, and a purple science book. Thus, the survivors gain a 150% chance of surviving with Mr. J. Bauer for one week. This week we insteded Stark into the room. Why Stark? Because he was caught handing out the wtw! That in my mind is one of the worst possible crimes that you can be accused of. Stark was thrown into his room with nothing but the six items listed above. Stark only lasted 4 minutes because Mr. Bauer tried to tap leafy for maple syrup and Leafy accedentally hit the door release button because he was especially tickleish is the area where Mr. Bauer tried to tap him. After the door was opened Stark didn't hesitate one bit, he leaped for the open doorway and set himself free, losing the opportunity to get his fortune cookie.