Sermon - May 7, 2000 - Rev. Fr. John-Brian Paprock –
all rights reserved
Mar Thoma
John 20:19-31
Holy
Mar Thoma, the "doubting" apostle, is mentioned in all Gospels and
also mentioned in Acts. However, in Matthew, Mark and Luke (and Acts), he
is mentioned only once in a list of apostles, usually next to Matthew. In
the Gospel of John, Mar Thoma has a larger role, especially in chapter
20. In chapter 11 of John's Gospel, Mar Thoma accompanied the Lord to
Bethany to be a witness to the raising of Lazarus from the dead. In chapter 14, it is Mar Thoma’s question,
“How can we know the way?” that prompts the Lord to respond, “I am the Way, the
Truth and the Life.” How is it then
that such an apostle doubts the resurrection?
He
was not alone with doubts. All the
apostles and disciples of Jesus Christ were in doubt and turmoil after the
crucifixion. It was to the women that
Jesus first appeared after rising. It
was Mary Magdalene tries to convince them of the resurrection. When Jesus Christ appeared in their midst
after the door had been closed, he showed them his wounds. Mar Thoma was not yet there.
So
he asked for the proof of Christ’s wounds, the same proof provided to the
others. Verse 28: “And Thomas answered
and said unto Him, My Lord and my God.”
This declaration of Christ’s Godhood and of Mar Thoma’s servant-hood, is
in anticipation of our own Christian life.
It
is important to note that in this chapter of John, Jesus says three times
“Peace be unto you” in the rest of the Gospel peace is mentioned only two other
times: at the Last Supper –
(14:27)“Peace
I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I
unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
(16:33)”These
things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation; but
be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”
So
when we can exclaim from our innermost soul, “My Lord and my God,” then we have
liberation from all lesser things. It seems
that last things to overcome in the Christian life are periods of doubt that
arise – but having seen the and witnessed the Holy One within, sensing His
sorrow, allowing ourselves the privilege of seeing His wounds and His cares for
us, we are brought to our knees in all humanity; and then, with all doubts
relieved from our being, we relax ourselves into the fullness of Christ. From then on we do not need to act with the
old self, using the old personality with its human traits, but become a new
being. When our Lord is able to
manifest Himself to us, the first thing established is the “peace of God, which
passes all understanding.” Great peace
can be ours, then we are sent forward with the Holy Ghost to forgive sins, no
longer on our own. See, the peace in
our hearts and the forgiveness of others are connected, but neither do we do
alone. We just need to overcome the
doubts.
Many
years ago, I was caught up in some difficult times. I lamented to Christ God to
relieve me of my burdens, but doubted there was anything that could be
done. I went to a place of beauty and
serenity, hoping it would give me what I could not accept elsewhere. Then it hit me – serenity - despite the
turmoil, like a whirlwind surrounding me, I felt an inner peace. In the magnitude
of God’s creation, I finally let God be in charge and resolved to do only the
small portion in front of me – the next right thing. Later, as I was driving away, I tried to figure out exactly what
I did to capture that serenity and, at that very moment, it was gone. See, this peace is bestowed by Christ on the
pious, those that accept and understand the limitations of being human, being
separated from God and not being God.
It is only by keeping my self as a servant to “My Lord and my God” that
I am granted this peace. Trying to be
God’s master with my demands and timetables that most people seem to call
prayer, gives me the impossible task in addition to my own troubles –
supervising the all-knowing, all-powerful God.
Talk about chutzpah!
The
other amazing point in the Gospel is that Christ rose from the dead with His
wounds fully intact. Now, I always knew
this – in my head. I have seen the
Roman Catholic realistic depictions on the cross. It is easier, perhaps, to
leave the injuries and wounds there. It didn’t really strike me until I had
encountered the intensity of my own inner wounded-ness and felt great despair
over the limitations of my pain and my fear.
Someone pointed this out to me and, like a thunderbolt; I was awakened
from my bed of despair. Christ, being
God, could have easily repaired all the injuries that He received and risen as
a completely whole and perfect man.
But, instead, rose with His wounds fully intact – not only overcoming
death, but also the frailness of our human existence as well. In this understanding does Mar Thoma’s
exclamation make sense – Jesus Christ asks Mar Thoma to prove His wounded-ness
and to “be not faithless, but believing.”
We want an appearance of the burning bush, the descent of the Epiphany
dove, the blinding light of the Transfiguration, but Christ offers His
wounded-ness.
“Thomas,
because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed; blessed are they that have not
seen, and yet have believed.”
“Can we, today, touch
the wounded flesh of the Savior? ” asks Orthodox priest and monk Fr.
Lev Gillet (of blessed memory) who wrote under the pseudonym A
Monk of the Eastern Church, “Can we, who are not granted ecstasies or
visions, be sure that it is a living being and not a phantom that we worship?”
Fr Lev writes, “We can, this possibility is given to everyone. Jesus is invisibly, but really, alive in the
flesh and blood creatures who exist all around us. We can estimate the wounds of the crucifixion today, and worship
them in the sick, the poor, in all men and women who suffer…Jesus says to us:
‘If thou dost doubt that I was crucified for thee and that I was raised from
the dead, pay attention to the suffering members of my body. Touch me in stretching out a rescuing hand
to them. In giving to them, thou shalt
find me. Do something for them, which
is costly for thee. Sacrifice thyself
for them as much as thou canst. And,
behold, in them thou shalt feel me living and present. Thou shalt experience the reality, the power
of my Resurrection.’
“It is not given to us
to see the Blessed Face constantly, but, like an evanescent vision, the face of
Christ will appear to me behind the face of my brother or sister, and, through
compassion, I shall meet the Passion [Crucifixion and Resurrection]. I shall touch my brother who suffers, and
say: “My Lord and my God.”
May
Christ bring to us Peace to comfort our turmoil and Peace to transmit to others
during this auspicious time! Amen.
