I’m at a loss trying to understand why someone would want to understand the workings of my mind. Perhaps it is in an effort to find some fatal weakness and use it to destroy me. I have enough enemies who would enjoy doing just that. However, I have been assured that this brief, and I do mean to keep it very brief; article will only be used “For good not evil”. That reassurance would not have swayed me except it came after hours of pleading and cajoling, and since I was reluctant to shoot my persuader (may she remain nameless) and I was not being paid to do so I finally consented. Women are entirely too skilled at badgering men.

In any event, I have been given the duty of explaining myself. I have no wish to explain myself and I don’t really intend to honestly. I will write whatever I choose to write and not a sentence more. I do however have a few things I do not mind sharing. Perhaps they will clear some things up.

One, I do not need or want a ‘friend’. Friends and ‘friends’ are liabilities…cannon fodder. I found out recently what emotional attachments can do to ones judgment. I was foolish and because of it I nearly bled to death. I will not repeat that mistake. I also realize that my lifestyle is not conducive to having a normal relationship, anyone associated with me would be in constant danger; I don’t need another body to look after. Two, I am not crazy, emotionally detached yes, psychotic no…madness is much too messy.

Just because a person has certain leanings, they are immediately classified as a sociopath. With no rhyme and little reason I have been thus labeled. I do know the difference between right and wrong. However the world is full of gray and it is in those regions that I make my way. Of course I have killed, I’m good at it, and yes I've developed a certain detachment due to my profession. I don't kill just anyone though. I've never been one to kill just anyone. I demand a very high fee for my services. It’s the old rules of supply and demand. The supply is low, but the demand is high, so the market favors me. I didn't make the world that way; I just used that fact to my advantage. I’m a highly skilled professional, I don't make mistakes and I always get the job done, for those reasons I can charge as much as I want...because I'm the best. I have been known to kill without the benefit of a pay check, but its a rare occurrence and is usually in the line of work. I take a great deal of satisfaction from performing a job well done, I do have a work ethic, even if it is the only ethic I have.

Guilt is a highly over rated emotion. It isn't sensible, but then neither are remorse and regret. I realized that many years ago, much to my benefit. Logic is paramount; emotions should never be allowed to interfere with ones life or goals. That is why I have made it a point to quash every tiny tremor of emotion I have ever experienced and methodically eliminated its cause. Why this has earned me the label of sociopath is beyond me. I have no desire to harm others. That is neither my intent nor wish. When people interfere with my life or job I simply prevent their further influence. Yet I am blamed for their actions. If they would but leave me be and heed my warnings they could live long healthy lives. I am merely maintaining control of my life and all its variables. What others see as murder, I say is only climate control.

Labels can, however, be extremely useful. The world has labeled me a “dangerous man”. I guess if you kill enough people, the rest get the picture. I suppose the fact that most of my kills are no longer people, but rather monsters, adds to my label of dangerous. Like I said a label can be a useful thing. Nowadays most people stay out of my way when I’m on a hunt. It makes things so much easier.

My past appears to be of great interest to any number of people, and the wild speculations I have heard over the years are truly astonishing. I am not going to clear up the mystery now. I do not discuss my past with anyone. However if you are interested in Ted’s past, it’s an open book. He was born in Ottumwa, Iowa on a small farm. His father died when he was very young; his mother and his uncle raised him. He was drafted when he was eighteen and served in the Korean War…he made a number of good friends there working in a M.A.S.H unit…I wonder how many people will have made the connection yet. The question is do I continue? Or leave it there and let those who don’t know speculate.

I’m going to leave it. Speculate away dear readers, it is probably the only enjoyment I will get out of this little project, besides the relief from incessant nagging. However, now that I have written an entire page I refuse to continue. Just know this, my past is my past and is none of your concern, and my actions and choices are exactly the same. If you have any questions, save your breath. I don’t give interviews.