Voice: LIVE FROM HQ, IT'S... THE HUGGBEES SHOW!
I LIKE Pink Fluffy Bunnies!
Pink Fluffy Bunies are CUTE!
Yay PINK FLUFFY BUNNIES!!!
Shelti: Hi everyone!
Stick: Hello! Welcome to The Huggbees Show! Where... eh, you should know what we do.
Shelti: You have asked your questions! And we are grateful. So, without further ado, let's welcome our guest: PadmÉ Amidala!
*Jahari and Tom drag on PadmÉ and plunk her in a chair*
Shelti: HI PADMČ!!
PadmÉ: Ah! Who are you? Where am I?
Stick: You're on The Huggbees Show! You're our special guest.
PadmÉ: Huggbees Show?
PadmÉ: Oh no. Anakin told me about this.
Shelti: So you must know how it works, then!
PadmÉ: You ask me questions, right?
Stick: Smart girl. And convinient. We don't have to explain it all. Ok, then, our first question is from Videan42.
Shelti: He's the answer to everything! ^>^
Stick: ...Whatever. Videan asks, "Why aren't you dead?"
Stick: "You must be dead, really really dead, I mean you were attacked by Sith, in the middle of a battle where hundereds of JEDI die, married to Darth Vader, and you like JAR JAR BINKS."
PadmÉ: Oh, well, just lucky I guess!
Stick: "Also, what's with you and Anakin? I mean, you're hitting on a ten year old! Just screwed up."
Shelti: !!! CHILD MOLESTER.
PadmÉ: Well, he's not THAT much younger than me, and he "hit on" me first.
Shelti: CHILD MOLESTER!
Stick: Oh, shut up and ask the next question.
Shelti: Ok! Leap of Fate asks, "Did you and Obi ever have a *wink wink nudge nudge* thing? Smoochies! He's far more sophisticated than moody sand-obsessed teenage-angst posterboy Anakin' (not the most catchy nickname i'll grant you) *waves Obidala banner* we, controversy!"
PadmÉ: ...Obidala? Who's that?
Shelti: She's asking if you like Obi-Wan, DUH.
PadmÉ: Well, of COURSE I do. But I don't LOVE him. I love Anakin, obviously! If I didn't, would I have married him?
Stick: You two are MARRIED??
Shelti: That's against Jedi rules!
Stick: But he turns away from the Jedi, remember?
Shelti: Oh, yeah.
Stick: Never you mind. Kylie asks, "Did you know that I hate you? And that most people do, not including fanboys? Did you also know that many, many people are looking forward to your gruesome, terrible, PAINFUL death in the 3rd movie? Huh, huh? Oh, and your clothes are ugly."
Padme: Well, I feel unloved.
Shelti: *pats* There, there. You're still loved by geeky obsessed fanboys.
PadmÉ: *sarcastically* Oh, I feel so much better.
Shelti: I knew you would.
Stick: Your clothes are ugly, though. So is your hair.
PadmÉ: -_-; Gee, thanks.
Shelti: Next question! "Exactly how many hairdressers do you have, and can I eat them?" asks Lei.
PadmÉ: She wants to EAT my hairdressers?? She's either a cannibal or extremely perverted.
Shelti: Knowing Lei, I'd go with the cannibal.
PadmÉ: As for her first question, I have a total of one hundred and twenty-four.
Shelti and Stick: O____O
PadmÉ: *pats hair* Well, I have to have help to do my hairstyles! They're so elaborate.
Stick: But STILL... One hundred and twenty-four?! Anyway, "Why is it, if you know Anakin can't marry, that you wear all those skimpy outfits around him? Are you trying to torment him?" asks Yantor.
PadmÉ: Of course I'm not trying to torment him! I happen to like my skimpy outfits. Besides, we got married eventually, didn't we?
Stick: But again, that breaks Jedi rules!
PadmÉ: So? Anything for true love!
Shelti and Stick: ...
Shelti: *checks notes* Commercial time! We'll be right back after this word from our sponsors! Well, not really our sponsors, but anyway....
The Geigan Gungan: I am a Gungan, not to be confused with Geigan, which can save you hundreds of credits on speeder insurance. Just listen to this satisfied customer:
Luke Skywalker: My aunt and uncle were killed by stormtroopers. I was forced off-planet, and was tailed by two annoying droids. Both my teachers and mentors died. I got my arm cut off. My best friend was carbon-froze. I fell in love with my SISTER, and discovered that my own FATHER was my arch nemesis! But I saved hundreds of credits on speeder insurance! ^_^
Han Solo: Luke... you don't have a speeder.
Luke: I don't? Oh, well, then... I'VE BEEN CONNED!
The Geigan Gungan: And remember: if you want to be conned out of your money by paying for insurance for non-existant speeders, choose Geigan. You'll still save hundreds of credits anyway.
Stick: And we're back!
PadmÉ: Whoo-pee. More dumb questions from dumb people now, I suppose?
PadmÉ: Thank God.
Stick: Instead, you have to answer questions from us!
PadmÉ: And is that any better?
Shelti: Yes. So shut up and answer our questions. What's your real hair colour?
PadmÉ: I'm not going to answer that.
Shelti: You have to.
Shelti: *thinks for a moment* No.
PadmÉ: Yes, darmit, YES! My real hair colour is BLONDE. ...Oh crap.
Shelti: I KNEW IT!!!
Stick: *pats her* Of course you did, dear. Is it really blonde?
PadmÉ: *mad* Yes.
Stick: Woah. Really?
PadmÉ: *really mad now* Yes! Yes! Yes, ok?! I died it before I ran for queen because people never take blondes seriously! Something about us always being stupid...
Shelti: You speak as if they're wrong.
Stick: ...Shut up. So, PadmÉ, why did you become a politician?
PadmÉ: Well, I did it for the good of the people, of course. The people need a leader, someone strong, sure, who can support them and lead them in the right direction. *an American flag appears waving behind her and "O Canada" strikes up* That person may, or may not, be me. But that doesn't mean I won't try to be the best leader I can. I have only the good of the people in mind. If my planet is in trouble, I'll be there. If the people of my planet are in danger, I'll be there. I will fight for the safety and the lives of my people. I will lead them in the best direction I can find. I will --
Stick: Oh, will you SHUT UP?? This isn't the Presidential Primaries, you know. *turns to Shelti* And would you QUIT doing that?
Shelti: *was humming "O Canada", but stops now* Oh, sorry. One last question, I think, don't you?
Stick: THE question?
Stick: Go right ahead.
PadmÉ: What? What is THE question?
Shelti: PadmÉ. I have a very important question for you. It is a question that is very important and I am going to ask you this important question.
PadmÉ: Well, what is it?
Shelti: Will you... say huggbees for us?
Shelti: SAY HUGGBEES!
PadmÉ: Gah! N -- oh, what the heck, fine. Huggbees.
Shelti: YAAAAAAAY!!! She said it! ^_^ Isn't that great?
Stick: Yeah, whatever. Well, that's our show. Tune in next time, when we bring on --Yoda!!
Kylie: Yoda the jumping flea!
Shelti: DON'T INSULT YODA!!
Kylie: All right, all right.
Arfindel: *walks onstage* *monotone* Sheltigrrl Moonfire and Stick, penname Aspiring Elf Girl, do not own Star Wars. George Lucas does. Above fanwriters Sheltigrrl Moonfire and Stick own themselves and HQ, and all that goes with it. The Pencil Show, which this show is a spin-off of, belongs to Hikaness, the original writer of it. Find Hika's website, The Cardboard Box, at hikaness.deep-ice.com. Because of fanfiction.net's review policy, we ask that you do not use the review system to send in questions. Rather, if you want to send in questions at all, e-mail them to Sheltigrrl Moonfire at email@example.com or use the e-mail form at www.angelfire.com/weird2/sheltigrrl/ask.html. Regular reviews are very, very, very much appreciated and loved. Thank you for your cooperation. *walks off*
Stick: So see ya next time! Same time, same place on --
Both: THE HUGGBEES SHOW!!!