Witness all you who are here today, for my seagull friends have been watching me. They have noted that I have always been kind to nature and that I have never eaten a seagull intentionally. The seagulls have watched me and they have seen these things.
Therefore note, all you who are here, that I have been chosen by my friends the seagulls. In the peril that is to come, I alone will be saved, I alone, among you humans, will be spared. For I have been marked by the seagulls!
(...and now to wash it off...)
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