Auntie Em. Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy.
We're staying together for the sake of the cats.
It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.
My karma ran over your dogma.
This is not an abandoned vehicle.
I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.
Welcome to Texas, now go home.
It's as bad as you think and they are out to get you.
If you don't like the news, go out and make some of your own.
Life's too short to dance with ugly men.
Life's too short to dance with ugly women.
My wife says if I go fishing one more time, she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her.
When you do a good deed get a receipt (in case heaven is like the IRS).
I is a college student.
Sex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off.
Sorry, I don't date outside my species.
Eschew obfuscation.
Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's face on the back of a milk carton.
It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
Don't steal. The government hates competition.
Is there life before coffee?
Never play leap frog with a unicorn.
Nobody's ugly after 2 a.m.
Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
The weather is here. Wish you were beautiful.
My other wife is beautiful.
I need someone really bad. Are you really bad?
Smile. It's the second best thing you can do with your lips.
Don't laugh. Your daughter could be in this vehicle.
Geez if you belive in honkus.
Friends don't let friends drive naked.
Save California; when you leave take someone with you.
I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.
There's one in every crowd and they always find me.
If money could talk, it would say goodbye.
When you're in love, you're at the mercy of a stranger.
Just when you think you've won the rat race along come faster rats.
If it's too loud, you're too old.
Wink. I'll do the rest.
The worst day fishing is better than the best day working.
An Irishman is not drunk so long as he can hold on to one blade of grass and not fall off the earth.
Cynics are people who know the price of everything and the value of nothing.
I may be fat but you're ugly, and I can lose weight.
Who cares who's on board?
No radio. Already stolen.
Crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.
Want a taste of religion? Bite a minister.
Honk if you love cheeses.
Flying saucers are real, the Air Force doesn't exist.
I don't care who you are, what you are driving, or where you would rather be.
So many pedestrians, so little time.
