Here's the intro of my opening page that you saw when you opened the link to this site which was introduced by the following soliloquy that really isn't a soliloquy or monologue but a bunch of sentences that I made up to introduce any viewers to my website on the opening page that introduces the site. (Does this remind you of how Mojo Jojo (from the "Powerpuff Girls") speaks? He's so funny... :)
Who am I that you try to forget but annoyingly keeps pooping up?
I meant popping, but I'll leave "pooping" there.
I am the flat-chested adolescent who doesn't shave her legs.
I am the girl who was a sane person in a past life, if I believed in reincarnation.
I am the tactless Honest Abe and effect predictor.
I am the unusual dreamer and indecisive procrastinator as well as
the speed demon when it comes to random topics that I find interesting in a conversation.
I am my sister's sister who she desperately tries to ignore, and often times, disown.
I am the considerate pessimist with a secret ego that is as large as Brazil.
I am the optimist who enjoys making derogatory comments about
myself to keep my esteem at 23 degrees below zero.
I am the constant complainer and hopeless romantic.
I am the scaredy cat, who boldly uses her potty-mouth for lecherous jokes.
I am the faithful admirer of
Super-Stiles,
Magnificent-Mochrie,
Proopdog,
and the Dazzling Duet of Brady and Esten.
I am the talentless comedian who only says what she says
because of a
very obsession that everyone now finds irritating.
I am the presumptuous writer.
Yes, that's what I came up with one cold day in the water closet, bathroom, baņo.
What else is there about me? Nothing really...I am a non-typical adolescent going through the usual crises that teenagers experience. Decisions concerning school, family, money, social life, and future college, career, hairstyle, coffin with red plush lining or pink cotton fabric...Yeah, nothing special here.
Oh, yes, if you don't know what the Stiles-Mochrie-Proopdog-Brady-Esten means, then type them in a search engine and you'll probably come up with "WLiiA?" or maybe the names of someone's dogs. I don't know. I haven't tried it.
Oh yeah, you wanted to find out about me? I mean why would you click on "The Real Me" link if you didn't?
Oh, you clicked by accident? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you by thinking that you'd want to find out about me.
Oh, you thought there was either some hot nude picture of the author or a really outrageous picture of a monkey or maggot lips or a baby holding its middle finger up or a dog biting its dick or.....*rambling on while clock spins around*
(2 hours later..) or my brother kissing his friend or a video clip of the Ugachaka baby? No, no. Sorry to disappoint. Just more boring, annoyingly random stuff to read. So move it along, move it along, people. Nothing to see here.
Couple minutes later...
All right, I give up. If you're still reading this, then you either:
-are one of my friends trying to support my wild crazy ideas by reading on,
-have WAY too much time on your hands (whoa! you can hold time in your hands? Hey, maybe that why they call those thingys on a clock "hands"! Hmmm...something to reflect upon...)
-or you really DO want to know something about me! *sniff* *Miss America music begins to play* You love me, you really love me! *music abruptly winds down and sirens approach* Hey, what the-
Police: I'm sorry, but you're under arrest for disturbing the peace.
Author: What? What are you talking about? I was just-
Police: Yeah, we know what you were doing...
Author: I didn't do anything, and you don't have any-
Police: Hey! Tell it to the judge. Now zip up your pants and get off of the pot, right now. And put down that giant poster of animal-mating pictures from the Discovery Channel. Those kind of things don't belong there.
*leads author away, doors slam in background, sirens fade*
Online quiz results
Well, if you are actually reading this, then you are the unlucky person who will now know me. I am (2000 x 5, -9999, +15, x 2, +40, / 2, -20) years old and live in _______ Texas with my family of ___. I attend aednrsyu muelacia and am no longer a wise-fool but a junior mint. Information about my personality will be added when I feel like it.
By the way I am a Raspberry.
And this whole "fruit thing" came about one pleasant chess day when Slarty & I were, I guess, bored & weirded out of our minds...