Gary, now 50 years old, looked through his little scrapbook of memories. He flipped through the greatest times of his life.

"Oh, yeah, I rememba dis one. I met Elvis and busted his ass."

[PAUSE WRITING]

Jordan, the author, is sitting in his school computer lab.
Jordan: Where would Gary Coleman and Elvis meet to fight eachother to the death?
Some Guy: Up your ass!
Jordan: Hmmm....

[RETURN TO WRITING]

Elvis, the evil bastard, was singing "Kung-Fu Fighting" and getting his fat slobbishness on, then suddenly he shrunk ten times over, and with magnitizing force was shoved into Jordan's ass.

Our hero, Gary, pretending to be a poor child in need of cash like a good lil' boy, is promptly tubed in Jordan's buttocks without any shrinking nessassary.

It smelled like ass in there.

Elvis was tottally coked out and thought the mounds of excrement where "big choclate balls." Then he said, "Yummy, big choclate balls," licking the withheld fecal matter madly.

Then Gary said "Whatchoo talkin bout Elvis?" He then moved the "big choclate ball" that Elvis was enjoying and shoved it equally through his jaws and nose. The poo poo in his nose jammed his respitory system, thus siezing his breathing. Then he kicked him until died.

Elvis took awhile to digest, but the evidence was destroyed and thus our hero lives to roam the streets! Good job lil' Gary!