Yes, that's right.
I am so doing the paypal-button-begging thing.

And what's more, I don't even have a sob story. Cocky, huh?
Well, okay I could sob about something, if it makes more sense that way. I did get thrown out of my apartment a week ago last saturday. Failure to pay rent? Throwing loud parties? No and no. Wanting to get married and spend the rest of my life with someone who, it turns out, didn't give a flying... hoot. Yes. Now all my possessions are in plastic bags and I'm sleeping on my sister's bed while she's away at college. But I'm not asking you to help me turn my life around. No, I can do that myself.

I'm back at mom's house now. In Long Island. I need a job, in Long Island. You live in Long Island, you need a car to get to work. So I sniffed around at some local dealerships and Lo! 2002 Kia Spectra LS, only 2,300 miles, power everything, adjustable seat and lumbar support, cd player, $9,000. $170 per month. I never knew it was so easy.

Then I went to get insurance. And now I'm going to have to go and get my deposit back and say goodbye to the car and also to getting a job somewhere farther away than the local Target. Because they want $587...
For.
One.
Month.

So yup, I'm doing the paypal begging thing. I figure, it worked for a bunch of bimbos who bought so much stuff that they're up to their ears in debt, poor things, so why shouldn't it work for a girl who just has a dream, a dream that gets about 40 miles per gallon? A dream my little sister could finally finish learning how to drive in, since my mother's car is a frightening deathtrap. A dream that will handily convey me to Seattle, Washington if I ever get over him and stop clinging to the pathetic idea that he'll come to his senses and beg me to come back.  I ask you!
Do I NEED it? Will it save me from bankruptcy? homelessness? Hopeless bleak despair? No.  But then again, I haven't been dumb enough to get myself into that situation. I am, however, cocky enough to muse aloud that someone ought to pay me for that.

When I was little I used to toy with the idea of stealing a nickel from everyone I ever met, ever. They could never possibly miss it, I thought, and yet eventually they'd add up to quite a hefty sum for me. Wouldn't it be great if a person could actually make some money that way without anyone else actually giving up enough money to even notice. I never did that, obviously.