MONSTER # 16

CHRISTINA AGUILERA? BRITNEY SPEARS? WTF?

Yes kids. Being the horny and *very* macho freaks that we are, we wrote a story about these 2. We were gonna call it 'what a very macho freak wants' 'cause we're studs, you know. Yeah...the Dr. is a stud...I'm a stud...there's no way in hell we'll ever *bursts in tears*...


.:only when i lose myself:.
'don't move'
'please. stop. please?!?'
'shhh'
'c'mon'
'shhh. i said don't move'
'pleeeeease? auch! not there...'
'ok. you wanted me to stop. you got it'
'c'mon. don't get mad'
'i ain't mad. i'm disappointed. i thought you wanted this. i thought you loved me'
'that's really lame, you know. how dare you say that? you're the one who doesn't give a rat's ass about how i fucking feel. forcing me to have sex and all. i should be the one who's mad. in fact, i am'
'what are you talking about? i didn't force you to do anyhting. you were the one who started this. you started to kiss me and touch me and you know it'
'yeah, i did. but then i told you to stop and you didn't listen'
'i'm sorry for wanting you so much then. i didn't know you were such a tease. geez'
'a tease? i'm not a tease. i do want to make love to you. but not like this. i want it to be special. i'm sorry for wanting something romantic'
'you thought i wasnt taking this seriously? damn, you don't know me at all, do you? i love you. i would have never done this if i didn't love you this much. in fact, i would be on my way home if i didn't give a shit about you. but i'm here. and i'm trying to work things out because i fucking care'
'i know that. and i love you too. and yes, i'm sorry i overreacted a little. but...i'm just ...this is a big deal, you know'
'yes, i know. it means a lot to me too. and i'm not a horny bitch. i was nervous myself'
'i know. i'm so sorry, honey'
'so what do you wanna do now?. we need fresh air to think about all this. at least i do'
'yeah, me too. let's go to my mom's house'
'you're such a little girl'
'shut up, you idiot. my mom's outta town. she met someone last month. sorry i din't tell ya'
'really? that's great'
'yeah, she was feeling really lonely'
'no, it's great that we have the house for ourselves. yeah!'
'bitch!'
'i'm just kidding sweetie'
'come here'
'no way. i'm not gonna get all horny and shit so you can call me a rapist later'
'i'm sorry, ok? please, come here'
'nope. you've been a really notty girl and you're getting none tonight'
'you're not gonna give me a kiss?'
'nope'
'not even a kiss? what the hell happened to you? are you the same horny animal that was craving for me a few minutes ago? i don't feel like i know you anymore'
'ok. you got your wish. just shut up'
'heh heh heh. i love you'
'i know'
'how could you? how could you watch the ~empire strikes back~ without me?'
'i've been a notty girl myself. if it makes you feel any better, i thought of you the whole time. i watched the movie wishing you were with me'
'really?'
'nah, i just want some nookie'
'you still have the hots for him, don't you? that or you want to make me jealous'
'what are you talking about? i'm over him. it was a crush and it's over now'
'the dickhead has beautiful eyes though. you gotta admit that'
'you're gorgeous'
'don't do that'
'what?'
'don't stare at me that way. you're making me nervous again!'
'oh, really? does this make you nervous?'
'stop. i mean it...whoa, you really are horny tonight'
'yeah well, that's normal when you're 19 years old and still a virgin'
'you're telling me'
'wanna do something about it? this is your last chance. after tonight, i'm going to keep looking and looking 'till i find my mom's vibrator and finally get some satisfaction'
'would you mind sharing once you got it?'
'sure, you perv. what are friends for?'
'thanks. ready to go to my momma's house?'
'you're kidding me?'
Britney and Christina left the house and quickly headed to Britney's car. The car didn't move for a few minutes. Then it started to rock. They had all night ahead but that just wasn't enough.
the end.

FUNNY WASN'T IT? You see...