A little experimentation, seeing what it feels like to give control over to him in perhaps just the sexual aspects... online, words.. then maybe phone... hearing how his voice soothes when you need it to, and demand when he needs it to. As time passes, you both feel it's time to meet.

Before you agree to meeting him, no matter how much you swear you trust him, there's personal information to collect. If he is evasive about sharing these things, do NOT agree to meet him. There are many horror stories of subs who trusted blindly that suffered abuse and damage both mentally and physically, as well as death.

-Real full name
-Verifiable Home address, and phone number
-A detailed physical description, and picture
-Employer, and verify employment with the personnel department of his company.
-Make and model and description of their vehicle (if they will be using it to travel to the meeting)

You will need to find someone you trust to act as your safe call. This person will need to take his or her obligation seriously. This individual will act as your safety net should something go wrong. This is the person you will entrust with any information on your meeting. Information you will need to pass on to the person who is acting as your safe call:

-Your full name, address, phone number, make and model of your car (if you will be using it to transport you to and from your meeting place.)
-All information you have on the person you are meeting including pictures, home address, and phone numbers.
- Detailed flight information, rental car information, hotel name and phone number, and room number as soon as you know it if applicable.
-You need to inform your safe call of the amount of time you will spend with the person, the name and location of your meeting places including addresses and phone numbers.
-Phone number of local police.
-If there is a play session planned your safe call will also need to know this.
-There should be regularly scheduled calls planned to inform your safe call as to your well being throughout the time you spend with the person you are meeting. There should be prearranged code words that will mean certain things. This will allow you to communicate with your safe call that you need help if you get in trouble. If your safe call will be calling you at specified times, the person you are with must understand that they will expect to speak with you upon each call. Failure to put you on the phone will result in summoning help. If you are to place the calls, there needs to be a call schedule. Your safe call should have an estimated time that you will return home, or to your hotel room. Another call should be planned to let them know of your safe return. If the meeting is scheduled to be longer than one day, again a calling schedule should be set up, and maintained.

A first meeting should happen in a very public and well lit place. Restaurants are always a good idea because of easy access to phones and help if you need it. Some say planning to play with someone you meet for the first time is a bad idea. I agree it is certainly safer to plan on meeting first and making a date to play at another time if the attraction holds, but sometimes this just is not practical. Certainly, make no commitment to do anything other than show up the first time. If, after you see the person, and you feel comfortable with his behavior, and playing seems like a good idea, then go for it. Back