I breathe. Ehy.

i used to at least live in the moment every once in a while.
i used to feel things as they happened
and think on them for a little while
--weighty or no--
and let it go.
me, all i can do now is remember conversations
and little incidents that meant less than nothing
while it mattered so little to everyone else
that no one but me bothered to bother.
you'll either speak or we won't
but pick one.  it's not that hard.
people make that choice every damn day.
it's unimportant language;
maybe it's printed in careless writing,
pages which i spindled between my fingertips.
how i used, i did, i said
i failed to say
becomes what you did not
and how you used.
i can't even pick things apart in present tense anymore.