Cocktails, Anyone?
American in Paris = Kentucky bourbon and champagne
Blood Clot = vodka, tomato juice, and Jell-O
Card table = When you drink 2 of them your legs fold up
under you.
Fuzzy Naval Base = peach schnapps, orange juice, and ammonia
HiV+ (for gay bars) = It's Hi C orange juice, V8 vegetable
juice, and battery acid.
Honeydew the Dishes = Midori and Dawn
Linda Tripp = 3 oz. of Old Crow on the rocks.
Martinizer = gin, vermouth, and carbon tetrachloride
Mary Poppins = vodka, tomato juice, and a spoonful of sugar, decorated with a paper umbrella
Oil of Ole = Mazola and sangria
Ronald Reagan Cocktail: Two and you start feeling senile, at
a total loss for words.
Rush Limbaugh Cocktail: two of these and you're a
loud-mouthed know-it-all.
Sake-to-me = rice wine, punch, and nitrous oxide
Shirley MacLaine = sugar, carbonated water, ginger extract - syrup, and pomegranate; or what ginger ale and grenadine were in a previous life
Sinead O'Connor = Irish whiskey and Nair
Sonic screwdriver = Vodka & orange juice going Mach 2.
The Energy Crisis Cocktail: Two and the lights go out on
you.
The Fuel Shortage cocktail; Two and you're only half-tanked.
The Mona Lisa Cocktail: Two of these and people wonder what
you're smiling at.
The Standard Time Cocktail: This one sets you back an hour.
The Communist Cocktail: two of these and you start leaning
to the left.
The Exorcists Cocktail: Two and it'll bring out the devil in
you.
The Wuthering Heights Cocktail: It's all the rage in England for those who always want just one moor.
Three Men and a Baby = Jim Beam, Johnnie Walker, Jack
Daniel's, and Infamil
Three Mile Island Iced Tea = vodka, gin, rum, tequila, and
plutonium
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