Rules for Kids
Never trust a dog to watch your food.
When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents.
When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she is on the phone.
When your Dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him.
Never try to baptize a cat.
Never spit when you are on a roller coaster.
Sleep with your clothes on so you will be dressed in the morning.
Don't flush the john when your dad's in the shower.
Never bug a pregnant mom.
Never tell your mom her diet's not working.
Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching.
Wear a hat when feeding seagulls.
Don't ever be too full for dessert.
Stay away from prunes.
Forget the cake, go for the icing.
Never do pranks at the police station.
Never tell your little brother that you are not going to do what your mom told you to do.
The two places you are always welcome is at church and at grandma's house.
Never dare your little brother to paint the family car.
Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it is moving.
Don't ever wrestle a dog bigger than you are.
Even old grimy oil has rainbows in it.
A duck is never, never a chicken.
Mud jumps on your clothes on it's own.
If you want your mom to know a secret, tell it to your little sister.
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