I Got An M.D. For This??
Who do ya call .... The Proctologist or The Ophthalmologist ...
A man with a glass eye had been out for a night on the town. Being the worst for wear, when he stumbled into bed, he dropped his glass eye into his drinking water on the bed table. During the night, he drank the water and swallowed the eye.
A day or so later he was suffering from severe constipation, so he went to his local M.D. The doctor inserted his proctoscope and muttered under his breath, "Good grief, I've looked up plenty of assholes before, but this is the first one to ever look back at me."
A baby was just born. He had all his parts and looked quite normal, except that he was laughing like crazy. I mean laughing real hard.
All the doctors and nurses were examining the little new born in front of the worried parents, but he kept laughing. He laughed, hands in tight fists, until tears were rolling down his cheeks.
During the initial exam, the pediatrician slowly unfolded the tiny fingers to check if the hand was all right. Nobody in the room believed what was found in the baby's hand.
A birth control pill!
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