Your wife has ever said, "Come move this transmission so I can take a bath."
You've ever given a rat trap as a gift.
Your mother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.
You keep a can of RAID on your dining room table.
You've totaled every car you've ever owned.
You ever got too drunk to fish.
Directions to your house include, "Turn off the paved road."
The dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
You prefer car keys to Q-Tips.
You've ever financed a tattoo.
You've ever bought a used hat.
You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
You're considered an expert on worm beds.
Your stove is on the porch and your lawn chairs are in the kitchen.
"Bambi" made you hungry for rabbit.
You spit chewing tobacco in house plants.
Your wedding reception included a beer brunch.
You think a "thesaurus" was a dinosaur.
You like to brag you learned to fire a shotgun before you could walk.
Rather than drinking sacramental wine at church, you "bring your own."
