FEB 2003 JAVA JIVE SHOW PICTURES BY STEB
Java Jive 1
Java Jive 2
GO CHECK IT OUT TODAY.
THE VALIS BIO
If, as Picasso once said, art is a lie that makes us realize the truth,
then Valis is a lie that makes you LIKE IT.
What is Valis?
I could tell you, but I won't. First, you must pass the Valis intelligence quiz.
Is it a briefcase?
Is it a misspelling or mispronunciation of 'phallus'?
But what does Valis mean?
It's an acronym for Vast Active Living Intelligence System, right?
It's one of PKD's last novels. One of its main premises is that so-
called consensus reality is a false projection that emanates from an ancient
satellite orbiting the earth.
The satellite is an artifact created by the real God, although the satellite doesn't know it. It thinks that it is God itself. It's a crazy delinquent God, I guess, and It's called VALIS. It shoots pink beams of pure information at the protagonist, whose life is changed profoundly by his experience. This Valis thingamajig projects a holographic reality, in which the book's characters slog through their screwy lives. The real, primary reality--a world of Platonic ideals, or, if you like, Kantian noumena or ultimate reality--exists beyond the phony- baloney world projected by Valis. You like it?
Who's in it?
Valis will be recording their new kaleidoscopic aural meatcleavers yesterday after tomorrow, so stay tuned to the intersystem ultraviolet wavelength receivers implanted in your crania by obliging aliens working for the intersystem Valis network. In other words, keep an eye glued to yer local music-type rags, even the nationals, cause these boys will hit big and I mean soonsville, dig? They got this new CD that just came out.
Where can I get it?
You can get it at your nearest retail music outlet.
If they don't have it, ask them very nicely to order it. Bein'
all snotty don't help in this racket, so be nice, huh? If that don't work, ask
them to order it all nice-like. The mom and pop-type joints prolly got it
already, but the big chains might hafta order it. Use as much juice as you's
gots to, but don't go breakin' crimes. For zample, you could tell 'em you
resent the Valis network: a federation of aliens that are way into the Valis
sound; dig me, baby? That should turn the trick! But if not, there's
'ternatives: if yer Internet crazy, you can order it through the Man's Ruin
website, or Van's web site:http://www.angelfire.com/wa/VanConner/
Or, you can order it via any online CD retailer. Do it any way you can, punk, but do it now, or you'll be left out in the radioactive cold when the next Valis orgy hits with hurricane force: don't get caught without the compliment'ry anti-'logical warfare suits that come with each Valis CD. Hell, they're good against even them anthrax cluster bombs or those 'logical aerosol plague bombs. I mean, when some crackhead nation gets riled and zings us with some of them 'logical weapons, like them black or moronic plague bombs or a bowling virus bomb or a small pox bomb, you don't wanna be walkin' around without either protection or the demonic, melodic, psychedelic lead-lined radioactive pop-punk vibe of Valis, complete with sinister lyrics, heavy-ass bass and guitar; and a wicked, driving beat that forces me off of whoever's porch I'm crashin' on and onto my feet, man! Valis makes me want to roll up reefers and INHALE, dig? Their new smash hit, 'Venus in Red,' is like pop candy hidden inside a full metal jacket! It's sweet as hell and hard as permafrost. This shit will melt the ice caps, like they were Snocones, my man.
Valis is gonna dig their way into the wallets of every man, woman, and child on the face of this planet, and people are gonna dig their tunes so much, they won't even care. Why, they'll be humming along to 'Venus in Red,' while they go down to the rekkid store to purchase even more Valis rekkids.
Gary Lee Conner
THE SCREAMING TREES PAGE
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