it rains on both of us just the same
but you carry the largest umbrella
and the most excuses.
"you don't listen"
"he doesn't care"
"they aren't fair"
and so we all nod sympathetically
and secretly wonder if anyone else wants to hit
you with a dictionary
so maybe you'll finally understand you pronounce
every word of your expansive vocabular
"it went too fast"
"you're not listening"
"it wasn't her turn"
we consider actually holding the underground bitching sessions
that you are sure already meet weekly
for the purpose of discussing your faults
"he said it first"
"she doesn't like me"
"you never listen"
no, we listen
but we don't want to hear.
yes, I am sorry to tell you it's true:
we are your friends,
but none of us like you.
21 May 2001