Spike just keeps on looking at him, and Xander just can’t help but worry.  “You okay?  I mean, no problem with the chip or anything? It worked, or didn’t work that is?”
 
“Yeah Xan, no matter what happens that seems to be gone.  I’m just…”
 
“What Spike? If you wore underwear I’d swear it was in a bunch.”
 
“Thought I could feel it yesterday, but now that we’re out and I had a decent meal, I realized I can feel Dru.”  Spike paused, watching his lover carefully to see the reaction.  Xander hardly even blinked.   “You do realize she won’t kill you Xander, you’re family to her now, she’ll know that as soon as she sees you, if the bloody stars didn’t tell her already.”
 
Xander thought about it for a while, and realize that Spike was trying to find his Sire, but was afraid of his reaction.  To tell the truth, before being used as a human lab rat he would have felt intimidated, but it was different now.
 
“Sad to say humans with guns rank higher on my freak out list than your ex being in town right now Spike.  You think she was looking for us?” 
 
“Might, dunno really.  Mostly the bond between us has to be strengthened with blood, just like ours, and it’s been a year or so since I’ve seen her.”
 
“Well let’s find her, I don’t want these soldiers getting their hands on my Mother-in-law after all.” 
 
Spike can’t help but feel relived that Xander isn’t going to be upset or jealous.  He can smell the bone-tiredness on his boy and wants nothing more than to hide him away for a day or two to rest but he knows he’ll need help.  He needs to get his boy away safe, needs to make sure what he heard was true and what could happen to Xander.  There were too many what ifs, and he’d be damned before he let anything happen. 
 
Xander falls into that half and half stage of sleep and wakefulness, just letting the car rock him into some sort of quiet and tried so very hard not to think.  He knew what Spike was doing now, circling Sunnydale till he had an idea of just where his Sire was.  It made Xander wonder if anyone had missed him, if his parents even noticed he wasn’t living in the basement anymore. Sure Spike’s Sire was crazy, and she had broke up with him, but it seemed that she was family to Spike.  Despite their history something had made her come to town, and he was sure their capture was it. 
 
It was oddly comforting.
 
He felt the car come to a stop and looked up.  If this was where Dru was they were in trouble. 
 
“Bloody hell!”
 
“Oh shit Spike.  I may be ready to face Dru but this?” 
 
“No help for it luv, can’t let the slayer kill her either, and well, your mates were probably worried.”
 
“If I felt up to betting, I’d bet they think you just killed me.”
 
“Not up to losing right now luv.  Come on; shift your arse.  The faster we get this over with the faster we can get the fuck out.” 
 
They’d come to a stop at Giles’s condo.  “Gee, what fun, I get to face the gang after weeks of being locked up, and Dru. Just tell me Deadboy isn’t in there Spike, please!” 
 
Spike couldn’t help but laugh.  He found it oh so funny that the mortal he was mated to hated his Grandsire as much as Spike himself did. 
 
“No Luv, the Poofs not here.  Come on, I won’t let them get you.”
 
“Husband-Mine, I’m more worried about you right now. Fuck. Let’s do this.”
 
Xander got out of the car reluctantly.  He just knew this was going to be bad.  Spike came round from the other side and just let him lean into him for a moment, trying to give his mortal lover strength.
 
From behind he felt Drusilla, slipping from the shadows of the house and he nudged Xander behind him.
 
“Dru.”
 
“The stars sang to me Spike, told me you and the Kitten were trapped in the ground, in the cold snow.  I couldn’t find you and the stars sing of tigers and mice.  Can we catch them in their own trap Spike?” 
 
“Yeah, pet, we may just do that yet.”  Spike watched as his Sire goes to his boy’s side, watched as Xander held still and Drusilla looked into his eyes and traced his cheekbone with a thin finger. 

”Kitten’s all grown into a Lion Spike, protecting the pride.  Blood on the sand of the jungle and won’t the cub be all pretty and sharp?  He matches you well my Spike, he’s lovely.”  She turned from talking to Spike to talk to Xander himself and for a moment he thinks he can almost understand what she’s talking about.
 
“Now, now pretty Lion, you must rest and the Tree is worried without her cat.  Here, you must hold Miss Edith; she wants to listen to the heart. She’ll keep the nasty nightmares away, galloping, galloping through your head, she’s much more terrifying and has a bridle.” 
 
Xander takes the doll that is offered and throws a bewildered look at his lover.  A Spike shrug, even after years of dealing with her brand of rambling it was hard to figure Drusilla out sometimes. 
 
“Now don’t just stand there children, we must go have tea and scones before the clotted cream melts.” 
 
Xander and Spike followed obediently, both shocked at the strange lucidity coming from the vampire.  Okay, she was still not making sense all of the time, but it wasn’t quiet as bad as usual. They got to the door to Giles condo and Xander stepped forward. 
 
“I’d better go first guys, Giles will be less likely to stake me.”

Spike growled down deep in his chest but he knew his boy was right. However he was the one to press the bell and he stood ready to protect both his Sire and his lover.  He saw the curtains at the window twitch and heard a sharp intake of breath from the other side of the door. 
 
“Open up G-man!  I’m still a living breathing boy and do I have a story to tell you!” 
 
“Xander!  Where have you been, we all thought…we’ve been very worried about you. Willow still hasn’t stopped searching even though Riley and Buffy have tried to convince…”
 
“That I’m dead?  I’m sure Riley has.  Let us in Giles. Please?”  He watched as the door open and waited for the inevitable stake or crossbow to be aimed at his lover and Drusilla.
 
“Spike! And, and Drusilla! Xander what’s going on? I’m not letting…”
 
“Yes you are.  I need help Giles; we need help. Look.” He stuck his arm through the doorway to prove that he didn’t need an invitation.  “I can come in, but I won’t, not without them.” 
 
He could see Giles thinking before he spoke up. “Very well, I may certainly regret this, in fact I already do, but come in, both of you.” 
 
 
Spike kept a firm grasp on Drusilla but his Sire was just singing to herself, talking to the stars or what have you.  He decided to let Xander do the talking; the Watcher never really would listen to him.  He sat Dru down on the couch and sat beside her, blocking her from attacking the Watcher.  Xander sat next to him and was quiet for a moment, running his hands over his face while trying to figure out where to start. 
 
“Fuck Giles, I don’t know what to say.  We need, we need Buffy and Willow.  Not Tara or Riley though, fuck if I want to see that bastard right now.  See me and Spike, we’ve kinda been at the Iniative’s version of a roach motel, and we weren’t supposed to check out.” 
 
“Good Lord!” 
 
***
 
Half an hour later and Xander felt some better.  For once he had taken up the offer of a cup of chamomile tea and Giles had laced it with enough sugar to knock over a horse.  That and the cheese sandwich went a long way to help Xander fell more like a human and less like a lab rat. 
 
He hadn’t said much and for once neither had his lover.  Drusilla had gone on about Kittens and Lions and killing and Xander so hoped Giles didn’t put that part together.  It was enough that he was looking at Xander like he’d grown a third arm. 
 
Xander could hear the girls coming up the walkway and he shifted nervously.  Spike just laid a hand on his leg and then glared at Giles, daring him to protest.  This was not going to be easy on his boy, despite drifting away from his friends since Graduation he still cared about what they thought of him. 
 
The door opened, and Buffy and Willow came through.  They were both in shock to see who was there, Xander could tell, but then he saw his Willow’s eyes light up and he knew it would be okay. 

That feeling ended as soon as he saw why Buffy was still holding the door open. He had heard Giles tell Buffy it should be just her and Willow, but there stood Riley Finn. 
 
Xander saw red, the anger and hatred that had been building up for this human since he’d been captured erupting from him.  He leaped from the couch, the doll he’d still been holding at Drusilla’s urging falling to the floor as he took a swing at the blond. 
 
It connected solidly and Riley crashed to the floor Xander following.  In the back of his mind he could hear Buffy and Willow screaming, Buffy demanding that Xander was evil.
 
Spike had leaped up as soon as he saw the Slayer go to attack his boy.  He pinned her arms to her side and by now it was obvious to the humans that the chip wasn’t working.  He wanted to go to Xander, stop him, it just couldn’t be good for him to be that enraged, but he was afraid to let go. 
 
It was his Dark Princess who came to the rescue, going to Xander’s side and shushing him.
 
“There, there pretty Lion, you’ve scared your Tree.  Mustn’t hurt the tin soldier too badly, need him to lead us to Frankenstein.  Hush Little One, hush.” 
 
The red haze finally lifts from Xander’s eyes and he’s shaken at the damage he’s done.  He hadn’t even knowingly thought about going for the other man, it just happened like a switch had been thrown.  Drusilla’s hands were running through his hair and damned if it didn’t feel better than anything his own Mother had done for him. 
 
“There now, go to your Tree, she’s missed you. Let me take care of the bad man for you.”  She tugs at his ear and pushes him towards where Willow was standing with a deer in the headlights look.
 
“Xander where have you been, we’ve been so worried!  Why did you attack Riley and oh goodness Spike’s chip is out isn’t it, did he hurt you? And why is Drusilla taking care of you? Xander what’s going on?” 
 
Giles seems to snap out of his stupor at seeing the boy he thought he knew viscously attack someone.  “Xander please sit down, take Willow with you.   Buffy do not dust anyone until we figure out what’s going on.  Spike, please let go of Buffy and keep her” he flings his arm out at Drusilla who is swaying before an unconscious Riley, “from doing anything insane.  Now, one at a time, what is going on here?” 
 
Spike gathers Drusilla into his arms and sits her next to Xander and stands behind the couch.  He doesn’t trust the Slayer to not stake first and ask questions later.  As he does so he can’t help but notice the terrified look in the witch’s eyes.  Her eyes get even wider as Xander picks up the doll from the floor and hands it to the vampire with a shaky smile. 
 
Spike figures he’ll have to start their little tale, his boy’s just too nervous after that little display. 
 
“It’s like this Watcher.  ‘Bout a week or so after the world just about ended yet again, that time with the bloody Vahrall demons at the library, Xan and me was patrolling at one of our usual places.  The long and short of it is we were both caught by Captain Cardboards friends over there and used as guinea pigs, just got out early tonight.”
 
“It was seriously fucked up guys.  They poked and prodded and I don’t know what else! It’s been weird, we don’t even know what day it is yet even.” 
 
“It’s April Xander, April tenth. Can you tell me exactly what they did to you?” 
 
“Maybe later G-man, okay? I am seriously tired here, and freaked.  I just want to go home.” 
 
“Oh Xander I’m so sorry we didn’t find you!! We looked, really, but my location spell just didn’t work and we couldn’t find you and your basement was empty and,” here the volume on Willow’s babble went down to where Xander could barely hear it. “Buffy was convinced Spike got the chip out and killed you. I’m sorry! If I would have known…”
 
Xander hugs his friend, enjoying the scent of her shampoo as he buried his face in her hair.  “It’s okay Wills.  You didn’t know.  You haven’t walked home with me in a while; you didn’t know I haven’t really lived there this year.  I understand.”  
 
“Well I don ‘t understand!”  Buffy.  Xander sighed, he didn’t feel up to her questioning right now, but he knew there would be no way out of it.  He watched as she paced across the room and then turned and looked at Xander. “Why did they keep you?  You’re just a human, Spike they might dissect into little pieces, but they’d never get anything out of you!  And why are you being so nice to Fangless and his girlfriend? What’s she doing here anyway?” 
 
Spike watches as Xander recoils at the girl’s unintentionally harsh words.  “Shut your fucking mouth Slayer!  You know nothing!  My Sire is here because she was looking for us, knew those of her blood needed her! While you all were convinced I’d killed my boy or just bloody well got busy and forgot him!  I should just take your pet solider over there and finish off what Xander started!” 
 
Xander can almost see the train wreck that is coming and part of his doesn’t want to stop it.  It hurts that Buffy is more concerned about his status as a human than whether or not he was okay.  When they first told Giles the older man had looked him over from top to bottom.  Okay so Giles was probably looking for puncture marks, and they were there, at his throat, but most of his injuries were from the bruises, scrapes and cuts were from tests and samples the scientists had forced him to give. 
 
Still he doesn’t want his lover scattered to the four winds.  He lets go of Willow’s hand and joins Spike behind the couch, keeping an eye on Dru to make sure she doesn’t hurt his Wills.  He lays a hand on Spike’s arm, trying to quiet him.
 
“Spike please, arguing isn’t going to help right now.” 

Spike captures his hand, holding his boy tight.  The time for hiding is over.  “She just shouldn’t say anything like that about you luv.”  He hears the gasps that come from three different sets of lungs and could almost grin.  If he weren’t so busy looking at Xander he’d love to see their faces. 
 
Once again Buffy makes a move as if to stake him, but his Dru is faster, protecting her Childe.  “Must listen and learn.  The Lion has lain with the Wolf.  Run and catch! Rabbits hiding in the lettuce patch!” 
 
“What the hell?”
 
“Xander!”
 
Xander hears the fury in Buffy’s voice, the confusion in Willow’s.  Giles says nothing, only polishes his glasses and tried to look elsewhere.  He probably figured it out as soon as we got here, Xander figures. 
 
“Buffy just chill, okay?  You’re not going to hurt Spike or Drusilla, they’re my family. Got it?”
 
 
That announcement went over even worse than the one before.  Giles sinks down into an armchair and Buffy looks like she’s going to have a stroke.  Xander looks as his Willow, his best friend for so many years, still his best friend if you didn’t count Spike, which Xander did.  Willow looks wide eyed and frightened, as if he’d announced he had cancer or something. 
 
Giles finally speaks up.  “I think you’d better explain yourself Xander, now.”
 
“It’s like this, Spike and I, we’re together, the forever kind of together.  The only reason we came back to Sunnydale after last summer was to find a spell to attach my soul for when he’d turn me but then the Soldier boys got a hold of him.  I am Alexander, Consort to William the Bloody, also known as Spike, Childe of Drusilla and a Master in the line of Aurelius.”  He spoke the formal words knowing that while Buffy and Willow may not understand Giles will. 
 
Spike wraps his arms around his mate, feeling proud.  He almost laughs at the continued confusion on the two girls faces, Dru had stopped restraining the Slayer and was now petting Red, humming to herself once more.  The Watcher looks as if he’d announce the Queen was really a man, he’s so shocked.  Maybe they’d played their rolls as two friends that fought constantly too well.
 
“Good Lord Xander do you know what you’ve done!  You’ve bound yourself to, to Spike! A soulless demon!  This can be broken, I know just the spell and…” He gets up but before he can find a book but Xander is the one who stops him. 
 
“You will not break our bond Giles!  I wanted this!”
 
“Xander please understand, I realize the time you spent with Spike may have left you with certain feelings, sharing the same cell and all, but surely now that you’re out you will change your mind.” 
 
“Xander please, Giles is right, I know a spell that will fix…”

Willow jumps as her oldest and dearest friend growls low in his throat at her.  He will always have a special place in his heart for Willow, but Xander will allow no one to come between Spike and himself. 
 
“It’s not something new Giles, we’ve been mated since last August, and you guys just never noticed.”

Willow, dear, sweet almost-sister.  Willow looks guilty and calculating all at once.  He can see her look at how they are standing, Spike holding him close as if he was precious, and she starts a smile.  He knew he could count on Willow.  
 
But it’s Buffy who’s reaction he’s been most afraid of all this time, and he could tell he was going to be right.  All he can see is hurt and anger in her eyes. 
 
“What ever happened to hating vampires Xander, huh?  You always hated mine and Angel’s relationship and now you’re getting it up the ass from Spike?  Who’s tried to kill us more than once?  You’re insane!” 
 
Spike’s arms tightened around his boy and both vampires hissed at the girl.  Xander’s there before they are this time and Spike can’t help but feel proud at how his boy is standing up for himself. 
 
“Okay number one this is so different from Angel it isn’t even funny.  Number two, can’t someone grow up just a little and change his mind about things?  Don’t get me wrong, I still can’t stand Deadboy, but this time it’s not just because he’s a vampire, it’s because he’s a horse’s ass.  And Number Three, you’re not my mother, you can’t tell me what to do or who to love, so get over yourself!” 
 
By the end of his speech, he was straining against Spike’s hold, wanting to attack this woman he had thought was his friend.  Okay, so he kept their mating a secret, it wasn’t that big of one, if they would have at anytime asked what was going on in his life, he had promised to tell them. 
 
But Buffy and Willow had been so busy with college and Giles with his mid-life crisis or whatever it was that had been plaguing the Watcher.  Xander thought that Oz knew, with his werewolf nose, but the quiet boy had never said and Xander never asked. 
 
“Perhaps we should all sit and talk about this calmly and…”
 
“Fuck calm Giles, he’s standing there with an unchipped Spike and Drusilla.  He’s either with them or with us, he can’t do both.”
 
“Bullshit Buffy, I’ve been both for a while now.  Where do you think I got the explosives that blew the Mayor sky high, Big and Small Lots?  Spike here helped me out and we weren’t even lovers yet.  Hell, you think I was able to stop Faith when she tried to kill me all by myself. I would have died if it wasn’t for Spike coming out of hiding where he was stalking me and saved me.”
 
 
“Good Lord!”  Giles takes off his glasses and pinches the bridge of his nose while Willow shakes her head. 
 
“He… he was stalking you Xander?”
 
“Yeah Wills, but not in a bad way by that point.  It’s a vampire thing, it’s cute.”
 
“M’not cute Xander, I’m evil.”

”So not helping Husband-Mine, and yes you are cute, get over it already.”
 
Spike just smirks at his lover, the comment did what he had intended it to do, make Red smile just a bit and drain some of the anger out of his boy.  By then, he could feel Xander swaying and he knew it was time to wrap up this Hellmouth version of Jerry Springer and get them hidden for the day. 
 
“Right then, now you know and knowing is half the battle and all that crap.  We need to get hidden before the Slayer’s boy and his friends find us and take us to task for not accepting their hospitality.  Dru love, Dru!”  He shouts to get his Sire’s attention, she’d been singing to herself while standing in front of Finn.  “Dru love, see what you can do about his memories, make sure he doesn’t remember us, alright? Can you do that?”
 
“Spiders in his brain, scuttling across the surface of the water. Pick one out and squish it, watch him twist.” 
 
Spike cocks his head to the side and watches as she rouses the man enough to look in her eyes as she speaks to him softly.  She must think she can do it, he figures, either that or she’s going to stomp the soldier flat, either way he didn’t care as long as no one knew he’d found the escapees.  
 
“We’ll call you tomorrow.  Red, I’ll need some help from you especially, I’ll explain tomorrow.  Meanwhile, I’m taking my boy somewhere to rest.  Don’t worry, we’ll take Dru with us and she’ll be a good girl, won’t you, Princess.” 
 
“Mustn’t upset the kittens right now or they’ll cry and there will be no milk.”  She finished with Riley and walks up to Xander, holding out her hand.  Xander looks at him and all Spike can do is shrug and watch as Xander holds her hand like she’s a little girl he’s got to keep track of.  What little tan Xander had before being captured has faded and they look beautiful together, both tall and dark and pale.  His future and his past. 
 
“No!  We are not helping you Spike!  If they’re after Xander too, well I’m sorry I’ll help him but not the gruesome twosome!  Is no one else freaked that Xander’s in some weird vampire group sex thing?” 
 
“Buffy! While I might not approve of Xander’s choices, the truth is that it’s too late.  We-we simply can’t let them fall into the Initiative’s hands just because you don’t approve…” 
 
“Approve!  Hell I should just stake them both and then Xander won’t be in this mess any longer.”
 
“Stop it Buffy, just stop it!  Look at him! He’s hurt and tired; Spike and Drusilla are the only things keeping him standing right now.  I knew he wasn’t dead, Tara told me not to give up but I listened to you! Now I’m going to help my friend and support him and if you don’t like it, well that’s just tough!”
 
“But Willow, he tried to kill you last year when he kidnapped you!  How can you forget that? He’s a killer, he’ll only hurt Xander!” 
 
“Right now Buffy, the only thing I see hurting Xander is you, perhaps you should think on that.  Spike, the three of you are welcome to stay here for the day if you think it will be safe. I believe between Willow and I, we should be able to ward the house for a short period of time.  Perhaps Willow can run and get you any supplies you need once it’s dawn.   That would help you three keep a low profile until we figure out how to… what to do.” 
 
Spike watches the group as it shifts from its usual, supporting the Slayer no matter what, to Xander for once.  He knows for a fact that the Watcher would as soon stake him as look at him, but because of Xander he’s offering a roof and a bed.  He wasn’t that surprised by Red’s reaction, in fact he’d bet the little girl wouldn’t want to leave his mate’s side if she could. 
 
But the Slayer, she was reacting exactly as Xander had said she would. Her scent told a story of anger, resentment, and jealousy. 
 
“No way Giles!  I can’t believe you of all people are supporting this!” 
 
“Buffy, it’s done, if you don’t like it that’s your problem, but I am Spike’s Consort, nothing you can do will change that and I won’t let you even try.” 
 
All through the fight, Xander had been trying to get a hold of himself; it wasn’t fair to Willow and Giles if he didn’t say anything to protect his lover. She had been the main reason they had stayed quiet, he had hoped that they would get to know Spike as a person and not just a vampire while the chip was in place, but Buffy never even tried to look at the personality that was Spike, she just saw the killer. 
 
“And what are you going to do Xander? Throw doughnuts at me?”
 
“Pretty Lion has blood on the sands Slayer, claw out your eyes to make you see.  Toy soldier, kitten and puppy in one, my Lion’s jaws can snatch your neck make it crush.  Shouldn’t push, or he’ll go away and you’ll never get to meet the dark that’s coming.  The stars sing of the dark and how it will save the light one day.”   Drusilla had never let go of his hand, but had switched to her demonic face and danced at the end of his arm. 
 
“That’s it, I’m staking ‘em!” Buffy rushed forward and Giles stepped in front of her.
 
“You’ll do no such thing.  Go home, get some rest and we’ll… we’ll discuss this further once everyone has had some rest.  I take it you three will be staying?” 
 
“Sure mate, as long as we can have a bed instead of the bathtub this time.”  Spike smirked at the Watcher, unable to pass at annoying the man just a little. 
 
A half hour later found Xander asleep in the guestroom, Drusilla sitting by the bed crooning to his Consort while Spike kept watch from a window for any soldiers.  He didn’t really want to stay where they’d be so easily found, but he knew Xander couldn’t go on. 
 
The slayer had taken her boy toy home after he made sure the soldier knew nothing. The woman had promised no help, but that she wouldn’t say anything either.  Somehow he had a hard time believing her though, they’d have to get out of Sunnydale quickly. 
 
A soft step on the stair alerted Spike to a presence but he relaxed when he found only Willow’s scent.  He quietly slipped out the door into the halfway and met her halfway up the stairs.
 
“Spike?  I…I can’t sleep and you said that you’d need my help for something and well I thought I’d try to get a start on it. I mean I can go and get Xander a change of clothes or some food or get you some blood. I know you can bite now but I don’t think it’s a good idea right now if the army guys will be looking for you.” 
 
“Wow Red, now I know how you kept up with my boy for all those years.  Is not breathing while babbling a Sunnydale trait?” 
 
The girl blushed and Spike let up on the teasing.  Leading her back downstairs and setting her on the couch, he sat back and really looked at her.
 
“Listen Red, Willow, what I’m going to tell you, you can’t tell anyone, not the Watcher, not the Slayer, not anyone.”
 
“Not even Tara? We’ve gotten really close while you were-were gone.  She’s the one who helped me keep hoping we’d find Xander.”
 
“Would you trust her with your life and Xander’s?”
 
“Yes.”
 
Spike just looked into the girls green eyes, noticing the set of her jaw.  It was what Xan called her Resolve Face. 
 
“Okay pet, I’ll trust your judgment on her, but know this.  As much as Xander loves you lot, if what I’m about to tell you gets round neither one of you will live.  Not a threat Red, a promise.  It’s that important.”
 
She nodded and swallowed.  Spike leaned forward so no listening equipment that might be trained on them would hear.  It was only paranoia if there wasn’t anyone out to get you. 
 
“Need you to hack, or whatever it is you do, into the Initiative’s computers.  They did some experiments on Xan, cut him open like.  I need you to find out what they did and destroy anything about us.  Can you do that, Red?” 
 
Her lips had thinned at the thought of her friend being hurt.  She nodded.  “I can do that, I’ll get back to you as soon as I’ve found something.” 
 
“Red?  From what little I know it’s a bit out there pet, just don’t say anything, got it?” 
 
“Got it.” 
 
****
 
Eight hours later and Xander was beginning to think he might get back to normal sometime soon.  Sleep followed by food was always of the good.  Now if only he could get Spike to rest.  The vampire had been on guard all day, and now that Giles was awake the two were arguing about the fact that they were leaving Sunnydale.  Evidently Giles wasn’t going to wig over their relationship as long as he was around to make sure Xander stayed breathing. 
 
Xander, in the meantime, was trying to keep his lover’s Sire from eating said Watcher or do anything else too weird.  He was glad the vampire liked him, but he did not want to have another tea party with her and Miss Edith, or play with Miss Edith or any of the weird things Dru kept asking of him.  He finally gave up and asked Miss Edith for her opinion of where the stars think they should go.  Vampire and doll were now in conversation in a corner of the living room.  
 
He stood and listened as the Giles and Spike argued. Giles was adamant that the soldiers would stop looking for them and they would be able to slip back into their normal lives, well normal for them.  Spike on the other hand was taking no chances; he wanted them out of town as soon as possible.  Xander had tried to intervene, agreeing with Spike but he had grown tired of arguing with his father figure.  He knew they would be leaving.  He hated leaving Willow behind, but it had to be done, not only would the Initiative be after them, but Buffy was on the warpath as well.  If they stayed, either Spike or Buffy would end up dead. 
 
Leaving Spike and Giles to their British swear-word-a-thon, Xander wanted desperately to go outside and sit in the sun before it set in an hour or so, but he settled for sitting near a window looking out, keeping watch.  He hated being trapped and after weeks of being inside it grated on his nerves, but he knew going out would be idiocy right now.  
 
After a few minuets of watching, he saw Willow come up the walkway, lookin behind her shoulder.  As soon as she was at the door he opened it and let her slip in before closing and redoing the locks. 
 
“Hey Wills.”
 
“Xander, you look better.  Where’s Spike?”
 
“He’s getting all bloody and blimey and wankery with Giles in the kitchen right now, they’ll be back in here fussing in a minute.”
 
“Xander, why didn’t you say anything?  I would have understood, look at me, here I am being understanding Willow.” 
 
Xander put his arm around his friend and pulled her close.  “You gotta understand Willow, I was just so afraid that Buffy would kill him outright, I can’t live without him and it’s not just because of the Consort bond.  Hell, I wouldn’t want to live without him.  I just thought that if I told you, you’d have to choose between me and Buffy or I’d have to choose between my friends and my lover.  If that ever happened, I knew you wouldn’t like my choice.  Then the chip happened, and while I hated it, hated what those bastards did to him, I kinda hoped it would give you a chance to get to know Spike as a person, not just a killer.  Besides, with the chip he’d have no chance of defending himself, so we just couldn’t take that chance.  Understand?”
 
“I guess.  I mean, it was hard for me to tell Buffy and Giles about Tara.  But no more secrets mister! I mean it!”
 
“Yes Ma’am!  So you’re not mad?” 
 
“If we had more time I would be, but we don’t so I’ll wait till you guys are safe to be mad.”
 
Xander took a deep breath.  “Here Wills, you gotta see this.”  He pulled up his shirt and there, above his heart, was the tattoo they’d had done by a sorceress. 
 
“Ooh what a great Celtic Knot, I don’t think I’ve seen that design before, and wow, red.”
 
“Umm, yeah, it’s designed specially for me, for us.  It binds my soul to me permanently, no worries about perfect happiness or anything.  The red, well it’s blood magicks, tying me not only to my soul, but to Spike.”
 
“Oh. Oh so that means that… he’ll turn you?”
 
“One day, yes.  Does that bother you?  I’ll still have my soul, Wills, and you’ll always be my girl. And you did say no more secrets.” 
 
“It’s just weird, to think that you’ll be all grrr and biting and stuff.  You really do love him, don’t you?”
 
“Yeah, I do.”
 
“Okay then, what’s going to happen in the future, well this will make it easier.  I found out what they were doing to you to get you that.” She pointed at the scar on his midsection.  “And can you please put your shirt back on, I so don’t need Spike getting all possessive and growly at me for seeing you without one.  Jeez, looking back on things I don’t know how I missed it, no wonder you hated me after that ‘My Will Be Done spell’.”
 
“Yeah, well I’ve got other things to worry about now and I know you didn’t mean it.  Do another spell on my vampire, though, and I’ll have to show Tara those pictures of you playing Rudolph in the second grade Christmas play.”
 
“Xander!  You wouldn’t dare!” 
 
“Married to the evil undead Wills, not much I won’t dare!” 
 
Suddenly he found himself in a crushing grip of his best friend and she was all but sobbing. “Hey Wills, it’s okay, I won’t show the pictures, promise.”
 
“It’s not that, you’re gonna have to leave to protect… for your protection and I’m just going to miss you so much and so much will change for you and I won’t be able to help you at all!”
 
During this speech Spike and Giles had come back in.  Spike sat down next to Xander and looked at the girl that meant so much to his mate. 
 
“Here now Red, we’ll find some way of talking to you.  Xander will need that.  Did you get that information I asked for?”
 
She sniffed and sat back up. “Yes, and well, do you want Giles to know?  I haven’t told Tara yet even.  I love her, but this…we need to protect Xander.” 
 
“Hey now, I can kinda protect myself you know, I’m not the Zeppo anymore, haven’t been for a while now.”
 
“You just sit there and be good Xander, you’ll need protection if you…Spike?”  She looked at Giles with a question in her eyes. 
 
“Oh, bloody hell, all right.  Maybe this will convince the Watcher of why we need to leave this Hellhole.” 
 
Willow straightened up and pulled out her laptop.  “I have everything coded on these disks Spike, you’ll need the information if…well just if. A virus and a spell have wiped everything on the Initiative’s computers, so nothing of this research remains here in Sunnydale.  I can’t be certain about other facilities, and there are more, the Initiative is just one branch of this secret organization.  I’ll have to do some more hacking and research, I just got the basics.  Evidently, the government has been playing God for years now, using different methods to create the ultimate super weapon or super solider. Some of the files I’ve found date back to scientists back from Germany in the 1940’s.”
 
“In the 1980’s and 90’s there was work on a something codenamed Saint Francis.  The scientists used genetic manipulation and what they knew of DNA to create two weapons, one turned out to be monstrous, human intellect but worse than some demons I’ve seen with the maiming and killing routine.  They called it the Outsider because it was outside of humanity.  Their other weapon was what looked like a simple dog, but with enhanced mental capabilities.  The dog was smarter than some humans.  Eventually, the whole thing blew up in their faces, their weapons escaped and the Outsider killed the dog before being killed himself.” 

 
Everyone looked both fascinated and disgusted by what the witch was saying, and Spike couldn’t help but fear what they’d done to Xander, what he was pregnant with.  He wrapped his arms around his mate and all but pulled him into his lap.
 
The girl continued. “There are other projects, I haven’t tracked them all down yet, one of them was to develop genetically enhanced humans, make them into something like Carrie from that Stephen King book with the mind powers and all.  From what I can tell, that’s backfired on them too.  Then we come to Professor Walsh.  She’s my teacher for God’s sake; I don’t know how I’m going to be able to look at her!  Walsh worked at both projects and another further up the coast here in California, I haven’t figured out what they’ve done there.  Then Walsh found out about demons and the like and figured that demons were the way to create the perfect weapon.”
 
“She had a project. 314, a sort of Frankenstein’s monster made up of demon parts, human and computers.  It didn’t work, though, so she started working on cloning.” 
 
Here she took a deep breath and Spike could see her look at Xander from the corner of her eye.  “They figured that they could create a demon/human hybrid, vampire/human specifically.  The speed, strength, stamina.  All the best parts of the demon with none of the disadvantages like sunlight and holy water.  Something sorta like out of the movie Blade.” She added, noticing the dazed look in Xander’s eye. 
 
“My god, these people are fools!  They have no idea what they’re doing! Is it not enough that their experiments keep on backfiring, they have to make even more mistakes?”  Giles took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose.  Xander could identify with the man, all that info in such a short time left his head hurting as well. 
 
“There’s more, Giles.  I-I have all the information here.  See they made a successful hybrid, but the surrogate mothers never carried to term, evidently the child was too strong for a human female to carry, and well they figured out just a couple days ago when they were watching Spike and Xander that the fetus would need blood.  They couldn’t use the vampires as a surrogate, because they weren’t living, so they, they decided to use human males as surrogate mothers, using an artificial womb and implants in the arms to provide all the necessary hormones once a series of shots were given.”

Oh god, Xander thought, he just knew this wasn’t going to be good. “Please Willow, please don’t say what I think you’re going to say.”
 
Before Willow can respond, Drusilla gets up from where she’d been sitting in the floor with Giles’s best tea set that Xander had given her to play with.  “The dark will be coming and it’ll be so sweet, don’t worry my boys, Grandmum will take care of things, make sure the tin toys don’t follow with their sharps.  Miss Edith says I’m to learn new lullabies.  Must hurry though, I killed the spider but the golden girl has given him another and she’s calling on the angels to hurt my boys, hunt them down.  The Tree and her Light will help me, must use a cloak to hide the kitten. Oh the stars sing of the little dark!”  With that she started spinning in place.
 
Xander couldn’t look at her, didn’t want to think of it. “No, no, it’s can’t be, that’s…it’s something out of a bad movie.”
 
Willow looked up at him, her green eyes wide. “I’m sorry Xander, it’s true.  The fetus is about a month old, but you’ve only been implanted for two weeks.  You’re pregnant.”

“Not now, okay Red?  We’ve got other things to worry about.  He's safe for now, right?”
 
Willow looked at him like he’d just suggested Xander fly.  “Not now?  Spike, you’ve got to decide what to do!  You just can’t let him live in denial or something.”   
 
“I think perhaps that Spike is right; one does not make life altering decisions under duress.”  The Watcher looked pale, and he’d been cleaning his glasses as if he could rub away the mental image of a pregnant Xander. He turned to look at the vampire.  “I see now why you are so adamant about leaving and I must say that I agree.  Where will you go?” 
 
“Don’t know just yet, just away from here for now. We’ll figure out the rest later, once I’m sure we’re safe.”   He looked at Willow.  “Anything you think I need to know right away, speak up now, Red. I want to be out of this bloody town and somewhere safe before the next sunrise.” 
 
He ran his hands over his lover’s arms, trying to offer comfort.  Xander was still as a statue and cool to the touch; shock, Spike figured.  No wonder either, not everyday a man found out he was preggers.  There was no way Spike was going to try to pull him out of it just now, and he was not going to ask if he was okay.  It was obvious he wasn’t.   
 
After a few minutes, during which Willow stared at Spike and watched as he comforted Xander, she finally spoke up.  “Well, he’ll be tired, need lots of rest. Vitamins, I guess; Xander isn’t known for his healthy eating habits.”  They shared a smile, both thinking of some of the weirder things they’d seen the boy eat.  “I so don’t even want to think about his cravings; you’re welcome to that, Spike!” 
 
“Ta much, Red, I’ll find some way to repay you for that!” 
 
“Yes, if you two are quite finished?”  Giles sounded as if he was on his last nerve. Spike couldn’t help but wonder what had crawled up the watcher’s butt--it was Xander who was pregnant and they were the ones the Initiative gits were after. 
 
The smile left Willow’s face and she looked down at where her hands were resting on the computer.  “Umm, no, that’s not all, but I don’t know much else about male pregnancy or even female pregnancy, for that matter.  I’ll have to research, well, we will, cause I know you’ll help, Giles. I just don’t think we should tell…tell Buffy.  At least right now.” She looked up at Giles and Spike could see the conflict in the Watcher’s eyes.
 
“Yes, perhaps you’re right.  I’d like to think that Buffy would be supportive of Xander in his time of need; however, we must not take chances with his safety. In the Watcher Diaries there was mention of hybrids, but it is very unusual.  What I remember, though, did not include a male and, well…” The Watcher pitched his voice low so that only Spike could hear.  “Usually the birth was prevented by the Slayer, or some other agency stepped in to take the child to use for their own purposes.”
 
Spike couldn’t help but growl at the thought and held Xander tighter to his chest.  He wouldn’t let that happen. He felt the boy start to stir and knew he was coming out of his fugue-like state.  “Anything else I need to know, Red?  Get it all out before Xan here wakes up, don’t want to send him running into himself again.” 
 
“Just one thing. I’m sorry, Spike, but, well, if Xander decides that he doesn’t, well, want to be pregnant…” Spike could feel his face shift to its demonic form and he growled, taking a sort of comfort in watching the human girl jump.  How dare she threaten what was his? 
 
“I’m sorry, Spike, but it’s a possibility.  Or something could happen to Xander and, well, if you turned him that would stop the pregnancy.  It’s something you two will have to figure out.” 
 
Spike closed his eyes and tried to stop the rage he was feeling.  It wouldn’t do to kill his mate’s friend for speaking the truth.  As much as he loved the thought of a child he would never give Xander up.  A hundred possibilities flitted through his mind; birth defects, mutations.  It was terrifying and not something he’d ever thought about before. 
 
“Yeah, Red, I suppose you’re right.”  With a quick squeeze to Xander’s arms, he moved the boy over to sit beside his friend and got up to pace.  He wanted a cigarette, but one thing he knew was that the smoke was bad for mortals.  He didn’t want to make Xander breathe the smoke. 
 
“First things first, how do we get out of town without those bastards finding us?  They are not going to be happy that their pet project got away.” 
 
The Watcher got up and went to one of his many bookshelves.  “I believe I have something here.  From what I could understand of Drusilla’s…comments,” he looked at the vampire, who had gone back to the tea set and was busy trying to bite her doll’s neck, “she said something about a cloak.  There is a cloaking spell, one that protects against an enemy finding you.  This is by both magickal means and natural.  With that and with Willow’s proficiency on the computer, we should be able to erase any trace of Xander and yourself.  I’m afraid it won’t do much to erase people’s memories, or affect hard data like books and handwritten notes, but it will help.  I’ll have to go get some supplies, though; I’ll need tiger eye gems along with some herbs and some smudge sticks.” 
 
Spike just shook his head and watched as the human mumbled to himself and wrote notes absently in the margins of the newspaper that had been on the table at which he sat.  As a rule he didn’t like magicks, they could be unpredictable, but right now he’d take anything.  Thinking back on what his Sire had said, he looked to where she was sitting. 
 
“Dru love, what did you mean about the tree’s light?” 
 
“Maiden, Mother and Crone, dancing in the circle.  The Light is the Maiden; she belongs to the Tree and will call upon lost innocence.  The Sun will shine on the Tree and help her grow.  The Little Tree here is the Mother, protecting her cubs.  Gentle until a threat and then she’ll bite and gobble you down, bones and all.  She is the godmother of the dark moon; the Empress protects her court.” 
 
Drusilla had gotten up to stand in front of Willow and the red haired girl had paled at the description and moved closer to Xander, but Spike thought it suited her.  He’d seen what the witch would do to protect her friends and he did not want to be on the receiving end of her magick. 
 
“What about the Crone, pet?”
 
“The Crone is Death, dark and bloody. Bones that rattle and skull that grins.  Justice. Moldering in the grave, the worms care not for noble or peasant.  Death brings Life, by clearing out the old to make way for the new. Death brings change, both for good and for ill.  I’ll be your Death, my Spike.  The toys that want to hurt the Lion and the Dark will feel my scythe as I reap what others have sown.  Pale horse and pale rider, galloping through the ranks of the general’s army.  But be warned, my Spike, for other seeds have flown to the winds and more than one army wants the Little Dark.  The circle must be cast, before the hounds have the scent. Already they are sniffing at the trail, baying to the sky.” 
 
As Spike watched her, Drusilla swayed, running her hands all over her body.  Suddenly her eyes snapped open and Spike could almost see the stars that were talking to his Sire.
 
“Eyes!  Hateful eyes, snatching the Dark!  Can’t see the Tree for the Forest.  The Forest is listening, the Woods come to capture at dawn, must stop the Forest or the Tree will lose her Light!” She moaned and fell to the floor.  Everyone was quiet, and then Willow jumped up. 
 
“Oh my Goddess, Tara!    They must be watching Tara to get to me!”
 
Spike walked over and picked up his Sire laying her down in a chair.  He looked over at Xander and sighed heavily.  Time to get things going.
 
“It’s just an hour past sunset, and she said dawn.  Red, you’re with me, we’ll go get your girl and pick up whatever supplies the Watcher needs.  Watcher, I need you and Drusilla to protect Xander.  We won’t be gone long, if I have to steal the bloody ingredients, and don’t you argue, Red!”  He walked over and ran a hand through Xander’s hair.  He still hadn’t said anything; it was like looking at a living doll and he found himself missing the sparkle in his lover’s eyes. 
 
“See if you can get some tea with lots of sugar down him or something; that should help with the shock.   Just don’t let Dru do it, she forgets that humans need to breathe.”  
 
He leaned over and whispered in his lover’s ear.  “I’ll be right back, love, gotta run some errands and then we’ll blow this pop stand, okay?  I’ll even leave the sign up this time, I know how you hate it when I plow it down.”  He leaned forward to kiss his mate, feeling relief when the boy responded.  Xander would be okay; he would make sure of it. 
 
****
 
Three hours later and Xander was there, but quiet.  He hadn’t said more than five words at a time and Red and the Watcher looked at him worriedly.  What did they expect?  Xander wasn’t all babble; the time after Graduation he’d been entirely too quiet, the guilt of his friends’ death eating at his soul. Of course, most of his so-called friends had been busy doing their own thing, leaving Xander by himself as usual.  That had suited Spike’s purposes but it had hurt his boy.
 
For right now Spike contented himself with the feel of Xander in his arms.  They were standing in the middle of a huge circle the witches had drawn with herbs and salt in the living room, the furniture having been pushed out of the way.  The air was thick with the smell of cedar, rose and vervain. Black Madonna Protection incense, the Light witch had called it. 
 
Spike found himself liking the little witch.  They hadn’t really gotten to know the girl before they had been captured, but it was obvious she was good for Willow.  Plus she hadn’t looked at his boy like a freak or science experiment, she’d merely stuttered how glad she was that they were out and safe. 
 
Despite her shyness, Spike could sense an old and powerful soul.  Somehow, the thought of this girl helping with the spell to protect them made him feel better than knowing the other three would have their fingers in it. She had a calming, grounding effect.
 
Xander had remained impassive as they watched the magick users go about their work; casting the circle, calling the quarters and the like.  Now they were on the main work, the protection spell.  Giles had stepped back with the other two men and the three women gathered around the table turned altar. 
 
In the middle of the table were two rings, silver with what was called falcon’s eye; the blue version of the tiger eye.  The two candles that were lit made the gems look as if they were almost winking.   
 
Tara stepped forward, her hair pulled back out of her eyes.  She lit a white candle and took a deep breath. 
 
“I call upon Badb, Maiden Goddess. 
  She who stirs the Cauldron of Death and Rebirth.
   Lend your energies Great Lady to these two objects. 
    Let them protect our friends and hide them from enemy eyes.”
 
She stepped back and it was Willow’s turn to light a candle, this time red. 
 
“I call upon Macha, Mother Goddess. 
   Queen of the Land, Guardian of Childbirth.
     Lend your energies Great Lady to these two objects. 
       Let them protect our friends and hide them from enemy eyes.” 
 
This time before she stepped back she lit the black candle for Drusilla.  Everyone had agreed it was a bad idea to give the insane vampire any type of open flame.  Drusilla almost sang her part, and the difference between her and the two human women was slightly chilling, even to Spike. 
 
“Grandmother Death, Old Crone; hear my call.
    Dark Goddess of Banishing and Helper to those who must overcome their enemies.
     The stars ask that you protect my two boys and the coming child. 
       Nemain call on your ravens, claw and bite those that watch and wish to harm.” 
 
Once again Tara stepped forward and Spike knew the magick was nearly done.  The final candle, this time an indigo blue, was lit, and more herbs added to the censor.  
 
“We call upon The Morrigan, Maiden, Mother and Crone.  
    We ask for protection, and for our enemies to be confused. 
      Please Great Lady, Triple Goddess, help Xander and Spike find their path.
        Guard their steps, and stop all who may harm.
           May this spell not reverse, or place upon us any curse.
             As You will it Great Lady, So mote it be.” 
 
****
 
Xander watched impassively while the others opened the circle and cleaned up.  He’d seen Willow do magick before, but this had felt different, somehow.  The ring he was wearing felt as if it almost had a charge to it and it was warm to the touch.  He found himself turning it round and round on his finger. 
 
“If you’re going to…to play with that, Xander, turn it widdershins, counter clockwise.  That…that will banish any negative energy.”
 
He looked over at Tara; her head was down and her hair had come undone, hiding her face.  During the ritual she had projected such an aura of tranquility and power; now she was back to blushing and stammering.  At least she didn’t look at him like he was some sort of freak. 
 
He was beginning to believe what Willow had told him.  She wouldn’t lie, not about something like this.  Still, he wasn’t ready to think about it just yet, at least not while Willow was looking at him with those big eyes and Giles was going from anger to scientific curiosity.
 
“Thanks.”  He stood there next to her as Willow gathered papers and talked with Spike and Giles.  They would be leaving soon.  Drusilla had already slipped out of the house, saying she had to protect them from the nasty eyes and stop the angels.  He figured Buffy had called Deadboy and he was on the way from L. A.  All the more reason to get the fuck out of Dodge.  He hoped Dru could stall him; Angel would have no problem with staking Spike to save Xander from himself. 
 
The funny thing was that if Angelus was around neither Spike nor Xander would have had a problem going to him for help.  Not the Angelus that almost sent the world to hell, do not pass go, do not collect $200.  No, they would have gone to the Angelus of a century ago, who would do anything to protect his family, even his annoying grandchilde.
 
The girl beside him sighed ever so softly; her eyes were on Willow as she spoke quietly to Spike, her hands waving.  
 
“Umm, Wills said that you helped her not give up on me.  Thanks.  I’m sorry we didn’t get to know each other.” 
 
“I guess I feel like I do know you, from what Willow has told me.  But I’m glad we could meet and I promise not to say anything about...well, anything.”
 
“Do me a favor?  Take care of her, will you? For me?  You’ll have to sneak her an Easter Basket, her folks never let her have one.  Okay, so I know you’re both pagan and it's different now, but give her one from me.  And don’t let her think that magick is all she can do; she’s more than that.  Sometimes Buffy, well, Buffy doesn’t always see beyond the witch label, just like she misses the regular guy behind the Watcher.  They forget, too.  That was my job, to make them remember they’re human.”  He closed his eyes, the thought of leaving his friends forever weighing heavily on his heart. 
 
“Angel, well, don’t let Angel fool you.  Underneath all that guilt and self-pity is a killer, and from what I saw at Thanksgiving he still only has eyes for Buffy.  Fuck, he didn’t even seem to care that Spike was hurt and he’s supposed to be family! For all that Buffy may care for Riley she’ll still turn to Angel, she’s done it tonight from what Dru said. Giles, Giles needs to remember that he can’t know everything, and I won’t be here to pop his bubble.” 
 
He lifted his hand and raised her face, making sure Tara was looking him in the eye. “Take care of my family for me; if Willow loves you I trust you, and they’ll need you.”
 
“Xander, I don’t know if I can be all that.”  The stutter was gone, but she still looked ready to run.  She was flushed with embarrassment and he thought he could see what Willow saw. 
 
“Yes, you can. It’s hard sometimes, but you are strong, no matter what anyone from your past has told you.”  Her head tried to duck again, but he wouldn’t let her run.  “I can see a kindred soul, Tara; my birth family doesn’t care if I live or die, but the Scoobies do.  Even if we’re fighting we care. They’ll be your family, too.  I’m proud to say I met the real Tara McClay tonight, the one who’s helped someone she barely knows, the one who’s brave enough to work magick with an insane vampire, the one who called the Goddess.  So I know you can do it.  Take care of them and yourself.” 
 
She looked at him and he could almost see the gears in her head working.  She nodded and he pulled her into a hug.  He really wished he’d had a chance to know her better ... maybe someday.  He could feel people looking at him, and he knew that the others were finished.  He let Tara go and turned around. 
 
“Willow.” 
 
“Oh Xander!”  She was sobbing and threw herself in his arms, pulling back for a brief moment before he held her tighter. 
 
“God, Wills, I’m going to miss you!  I never meant to leave like this, I always thought we could come back and bug you guys till you got old and gray and forgot who I was.  Be good, Wills, listen to Tara, you’ve got a great girl there.”  His oldest friend was crying, his shirt was getting damp, but he didn’t care. 
 
“I gave Spike some information, like how to use pre-paid cell phones and set up blind email accounts.  If I don’t hear from you soon I will come looking for you, no matter what.  So you’d better call, mister!   If I find you and you just forgot to call you’ll wish the bad guys had caught you!”
 
“I will, pinky swear.”  Willow let go and turned to Tara, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend and continuing to cry silently. “Please don’t cry, Willow, you know that’s my kryptonite!”  He was rewarded with a laugh.  “That’s better.”
 
Spike was waiting by the front door, and Xander could see he was anxious to leave.  Still, this had to be done for his peace of mind.  He turned to Giles.
 
“Well, G-man ... guess you won’t have to hear that anymore.  Thanks Giles, thanks for being a better Dad than my original one.  I’ll miss you.”  With that, he ignored every rule of male companionship he and Giles had built over the past three and a half years by hugging the older man tight.  After a moment Giles hugged him back.  “Take care of my girls for me, Giles, and, hey, be good to yourself. Get out of the apartment and live a little.”
 
“I’m sorry we didn’t pay more attention to you this year, Xander, then maybe this might not have happened.  I’ll miss you.  I won’t miss the pizza stains on Tobin’s Spirit Guide, but I’ll miss you.  Son.” 
 
Xander closed his eyes at the rush of emotion that one word provoked before he turned into a bad joke and started crying.  He settled instead for holding the man tighter for a moment and then let go, stepping away from the human and moving closer to his lover. 
 
“You guys tell Buffy I love her, will you?  I know she’s just worried about me, but this is something I want, Spike is something I want and I’m not giving him up for anything.”  Spike came forward and he leaned into his lover, gaining strength from the vampire.  
 
Before they could leave Willow spoke up. 
 
“Spike, I don’t think I need to tell you that if you hurt Xander in any way, well, you won’t be able to hide from me.  Take care of them, I mean it.”  Xander could feel the magick radiating from his oldest friend. 
 
“Don’t worry, Red, I’ll have walked in the sun before you found me.  But I figured I’d get the shovel warning, not the magick one.  Glad you think I rate the big guns.  Don’t worry; gits like these army blokes always seem to self-destruct.  You won’t be rid of my sexy body that easily.”
 
***
        
An hour later and Xander was just sitting, watching the cars go by in the darkness, the red taillights in front of them flickering in the spring rain that had started as they left the Dale.  No one had stopped them; they had managed to drive right past the roadblocks. 
 
They were taking a chance of running into Angel and going south, heading for Oxnard where Spike had some connections from last summer.  Then they were going east; if they sped like the devil was after them they might be able to make Nevada before dawn.  Spike had made a call to some people and a car with special tinting was waiting in Oxnard so they could drive even if the sun caught them out. 
 
He knew they should be thinking about the big stuff.  Where they were going, how to hide from the government.  But it was all too much right now, so instead he worried about Spike’s driving, which wasn’t as bad as usual, and the lack of Snickers and other road trip snacks. 
 
“Spike?” 
 
“Yeah, Love?” 
 
“Tell me it’s going to be all right, even if you have to lie.”  He could see Spike looking at him from the corner of his eye; he’d long since stopped looking for his reflection.  They had the radio on and Pat Benatar’s 'Shadows of the Night' was playing in the background.  How fitting. 
 
Spike reached over and pulled him into a one-armed embrace. 
 
“Yeah, Love, we’ll be great.  No Hellmouth, no Slayer.  It’ll be our Honeymoon.  Maybe I’ll take you to that town in Pennsylvania, where they make all the chocolate.  Or we could go to Chicago and see the baseball team you make fun of.  We can do all sort of things, Love, just you wait and see.”
 
“No we can’t, Spike.” 
 
“And why not, Love?”
 
“Because Husband-mine, I’m pregnant.”

”How do you always know what I’m thinking, no matter how far out in left field I am?” 
 
“Cause you’re mine.  Of course I’m gonna know what you’re thinking.  Right now part of you wants nothing to do with whatever freak show they’ve put inside of you, and then there’s the other part that wants a family and sees this as a chance.  It’s up to you Xander, it’s your body.”
 
“Yeah but it’s your child too.”
 
Spike laughed and Xander just loved that sound and how it felt to be held in his arms while he was laughing. 
 
“I think Xan that possession is nine tenths of the law, and you’ve got the kid for right now.”
 
“Do you want it?  Do you really want to be the first Master Vampire to change diapers?  Carry a diaper bag?  I don’t want to bring a child into the world that wasn’t loved.  Not after what I went through.  I can’t do this, not without you.”
 
“Yeah Love, I want this.  Status doesn’t mean that much to me anymore, you know that.  I’ve changed a lot because of you, and I think a little one of our very own would be so great. What do you want?”
 
“I don’t know.  I’m afraid it’s going to be some mutant after what the scientists did.  And I know nothing about babies.  Hell I don’t even know how to change a fucking diaper.  What kind of parent would I make?” 
 
Spike rolled over on top of him and kissed him on the nose.  Xander just loved it when Spike was playful. 
 
“ I think you’d make a great parent Xander.  You have so much love to give, and such a unique way of looking at life.  Of course I’d be wonderful, we both know I’m good at whatever I do.” This was said with a Spike smirk and Xander smacked at him playfully. 
 
“Besides Xander, we can always buy books that will tell us how to change diapers or give the baby a bath and that sort of thing.  We’ve got the love for a child, that’s what matters.” 
 
Xander just lay there under his mate.  Spike was a comforting presence and he felt so safe.  With Spike he had found that he was complete, at least he thought he had been. But now he wasn’t so sure.
 
“You know one of the things I didn’t regret when we got together is the fact that I’d never have children.  I thought it was a great way to make sure the Harris genes weren’t carried over to another generation.  When Faith slept with me that one time I was so scared that I got her knocked up because I couldn’t handle having a kid.” 
 
He rolled them over till Spike was beneath him and kissed his lover, letting his tongue play in Spike’s mouth and doing his best to make the vampire gasp for breath.  He pulled away and waited till Spike was focused on his eyes. 
 
“Now all I’m thinking about it how cute you’ll be with a little boy or girl on your back calling you Daddy.  How much I want to share this with you.”
 
“So we’re going to do it Xander?  Go ahead and carry the baby to term?”  Xander had to laugh, his husband sounded so hopeful.
 
“I think we need to find some doctor or something to make sure the baby is okay first, but yes, I want to do this.  I want to have your child.” 

”Yeah Love, most of it at any rate.  The few accounts I had set up that Peaches knew about have been closed, bloody bastard was trying to stop me from getting access to any funds.  Shows what he knows, those were just there to let him play with.  Tonight we’ll go out and get one of those cell phones and you can call your mates before Red worries herself into a fit.  Maybe she’ll have some info on where to look for a doc for you Love.” 
 
“Yeah, and while Las Vegas is nice it’s weird.  I always thought it was gangsters that built this town, not demons.  Was Bugsy Segal a demon? Or maybe Warren Beatty?  Cause that would explain how an old guy like him got Annett Benning. And his sister’s weirdness.”
 
He heard the rumble of Spike’s laughter.  “Bugsy was a human working with demons Love, and no one can explain Shirley McClain.  You have the strangest mind sometimes Xander.  We can be ready to leave day after tomorrow if you like. We can get supplies for the trip tonight.”
 
“I want to go to a bookstore I guess.  From watching too much TV I know I’m not supposed to drink and eat bad things while pregnant but that’s about it.  Willow sent some stuff with us I know, but…I want to do this right.”
 
Spike’s hand came down and reached under the sweats he was wearing to stroke the scar where the scientists had implanted the artificial womb. He was only about seven weeks along so he hadn’t gained any real weight yet but Spike was fascinated with his abdomen.
 
“It’s hard to believe there’s a life growing inside of there isn’t it?  Wonder when you’ll start growing Xan, once you get too big you won’t be able to go out really, you’ll have to hide.”
 
Xander quickly hid the grin that had stretched across his face.
 
“Spike?  Will you still love me when I’m fat?”
 
The vampire all but jumped up and looked like he’d just seen a rampaging elephant coming after him, his eyes wide and panicked.
 
“Oh bloody hell Pet!  Red didn’t say anything about you being knocked up was going to turn you into a bint!”
 
Xander laughed and pushed Spike down so he could roll on top of him. “Relax Spike, I’m just pulling your leg.  So far I can report no cravings of ice cream and pickles, no morning sickness, and no crying over weight issues.  I don’t doubt that I’ll be big as a whale, men aren’t made to carry babies, but that will be worth having a kid.”
 
Spike looked relived.  “You are evil Pet.  I was about to run screaming from the room, and I still reserve that right if you do start puking up your toe nails.”
 
“You run and I’ll make sure to aim for your duster buddy.”  He leaned forward and nipped at Spike’s lips and then kissed, slipping his tongue in when his mate opened his mouth.  It was always an experience to kiss Spike, the cool mouth and strong muscle that stroked his never let him forget who he was with. 
 
He ran his tongue on the underside of Spike’s teeth and felt the resulting growl when Spike shifted to his demonic face.  He leaned away long enough to lick along the ridges above his eyes before going back to kissing.  He very carefully slit his tongue open on one fang and the taste of blood filled his mouth before Spike licked at him, trying to taste every inch. 
 
 
He fumbled down and unbuttoned Spike’s jeans, making sure to carefully remove the hardened cock, before raising his hips to allow the vampire to pull the sweats down to his knees.  He settled against the cool body underneath him, making sure their cocks touched, and started a rocking motion. 
 
Spike thrust up to meet him and they quickly fell into a rhythm, moving together even as they kissed each other and let their hands roam.  Xander found himself almost to the edge so he broke off kissing to make his way down Spike’s neck, laving the scar he’d put there so many months ago while at the same time offering his neck. 
 
 
Their pre-come eased the way for their lengths to rub together, creating a delicious friction.  Xander gasped when Spike’s fangs finally penetrated him, enjoying the feel of his lover drawing the blood from his veins before he bit as well.  He came hard as Spike’s blood filled his mouth, the feel of it hot and slippery and home.  He felt Spike follow him over the edge, a cool stream of come splattering his chest. 
 
He collapsed on Spike’s chest and cool arms wrapped around him, holding him close.  The only sound in the room was a rumbling purr and his breathing as it slowed.  Xander found himself getting sleepy again, at least until a sharp smack was delivered to his bottom.
 
“Come on Love, we need to get moving so we can get everything we need.  You’ll need to call Red once we get the phones.  Shift your arse and get in the shower.”
 
Xander reluctantly got up and headed towards the bathroom, stopping in the door to bend over to pull off the sweatpants the rest of the way and making sure to moon his lover. He heard the springs on the bed creak as Spike quickly got up to join him.
 
He turned and smirked at the blonde.  “Coming Spike?” 
 
“Keep teasing like that Pet and it’ll be a week before we leave the room, never mind leaving town!”
 
*****
 
Spike stomped into the bookstore, determined to find his mate.  How long could it take to pick out a few books at any rate?
 
Finding Xander in front of a large display with a slightly glazed look told Spike how difficult it was.  There had to be a hundred different books, half of them with cutesy names or in pastel colors. 
 
“Xander?” 
 
“Dear god Spike how do we choose?  This is worse than a research night at Giles’.  At least there I have a vague idea of what demon to find in which book.  This is just weird.  Jenny McCarthy from MTV has a pregnancy book out even!  Maybe we should look for a magic shop or something, I really doubt they have anything I can use here.” 
 
Spike picked up a book, read the title and put it back.  “I can safely say you won’t be needing information on a natural pregnancy Xan, or information on conceiving.  And I really hope we won’t need the one about twins.  A kid will be nice but I don’t know if we can handle two at once.  Look, just grab a couple and lets get out of here.  It’s not like you aren’t going to see a mall in the next eight months or so.”
 
He couldn’t keep the growl out of his voice, there were too many people in the mall, and kids running every direction and adults stopping to walk right in front of him while he was walking back from the cell phone place.  Anyone could try to grab Xander in this mess and no one would probably notice it. 
 
 
“Yeah, that sounds good Spike.” 
 
He followed behind Xander the rest of the way through the store, watching as his boy picked out five books, one of which was nutrition he was thankful to see.  He’d noticed earlier that Xander had taken more blood from him than usual.  Consorts always needed the blood of their mate to live, but usually Xander was much more careful.  Spike just figured it was because the child within his mate needed the blood too and planned to feed accordingly.  Already tonight he had taken a little from three different muggers and pickpockets on the way to the bookstore.
 
“Someone having a baby?” 
 
The cashier was a young thing, hardly as old as his boy and spoke with fake enthusiasm.  Spike could hear Xander almost growl and felt him move closer.    For once his lover had nothing to say so Spike jumped in to fill the gap. 
 
“His big sis is having a little one and we’re getting her some books.   These are the kind she’ll need, yeah?”
 
He gave her the cover story they had cooked up.  It would look really weird to have a gay couple buying pregnancy books for themselves unless they wanted to say there was a surrogate mother out there somewhere. 
 
The girl behind the register looked like she was finally excited about something.  “Yeah these are great!  I just found out I’m pregnant last month and you’ve got some great ones.  The ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’ one is required reading from my doctor, and the nutrition book that goes with it is great too.  They even have an organizer, if you like I can order one, we just sold the last one the other day.”   
 
This time it was Xander that spoke up.  “Well we’re kinda from out of town, so we won’t be here when you get it in, but I’ll keep it in mind.  If Willow wants it I’m sure she can find it.”
 
They made their escape, stopping in the middle of the mall to figure out what to do next. 
 
“We still need to get a laptop Spike, Willow may have more of those files she hacked from the Initiative decoded.  That plus I’ll want to do some research on the Internet on pregnancy too.  Damn, I never thought I’d hear myself volunteering to do research.  I keep on finding myself feeling like I’m in a Twilight Zone episode, either that or a bad comedy with Danny DeVito.” 
 
“Look on the upside Pet, we haven’t ended up in a cornfield and I’m not planning on getting on a plane.  I’ve got a contact already working on a laptop, she’s a Tesser demon and they’re computer experts, just look at the Gates bloke. Mandy should have it ready by tomorrow, that’s why we couldn’t leave tonight.”
 
“My god!  Don’t tell me that Bill Gates is a demon!”
 
“What, you think a human would devise a way to frustrate so many people at once?  Really Xander, you’re slipping, of course he’s a demon!”
 
“That just explains so much.”  Before he could go on Spike heard Xander’s stomach rumble loud enough that even the human heard it and blushed.
 
Spike just laughed, he had long become used to the fact that Xander’s belly seemed to have a mind of it’s own and complained loudly at the lack of food.  Being pregnant only seemed to make it worse. 
 
“Come on Love, let’s feed you before your stomach is loud enough to wake the dead.  Well any dead other than me that is”
 
Three quarters of an hour later found them seated in a nice restaurant, in a corner booth.  It was nice and dark and the low hum of different conversations sounded like the ocean and Spike was glad the place was crowded enough to make it difficult for anyone to listen in to what they had to say. 
 
Spike ordered fish and chips and Xander ordered what was becoming his usual, a rare steak.  This time he had steamed vegetables and a salad rather than a potato, but the squinch of his nose said he didn’t really like the idea.  The nutrition book was open on the table in between them.
 
“This sucks, low sugar, no caffeine, no artificial sweeteners, and loads of green stuff.  Damn it this is a human/vampire hybrid not a human/rabbit!  What else is there besides sugar and caffeine to drink?   At least I’m supposed to have lots of protein, that I can do.  Except they talk more about fish and chicken than beef, and that’s all I seem to want.”
 
Spike fought back the need to sigh.  He wasn’t sure if he wanted to get into this before Xander ate, but his lover did mention it. 
 
“Look you still have the hyena in your head Pet, not a lot but a little. Plus it’s a vampiric child. Only makes sense that you’d feel the need for red meat a bit more.  Probably should have the others too, just to be on the safe side.  We’ll stop on the way to the hotel and get you some vitamins.”  Here he leered at his young lover.  “Got to make sure you have plenty of iron in your bloodstream for me and the little one.” 
 
The waitress came with Xander’s salad and he looked dejectedly at the mass of spring greens and spinach.  Spike could just see the eight year old inside his lover trying to figure out how to get out of eating the stuff and laughed.
 
“It’s not funny Spike, I’m eating what looks to be grass and weeds.  Something so green cannot taste good, it’s just not natural.” 
 
“If you’re real good and clean your plate like a good little boy I’ll give you a treat when we get back to the room, an all night lolly.  How’s that?”
 
“I’m thinking how wrong it is for you to be talking like that while I’m reading ‘You’re Pregnancy Week By Week’.  That and I now have an x rated version of the Tootsie Roll song running around in my head, thank you ever so much.” 
 
“Took your mind off of eating the lawn clippings didn’t it?”
 
“That it did Husband-mine, that it did.”
 
By the time they left the restaurant it was late.  Spike quickly drove them to an all night pharmacy so they could get vitamins and some chamomile tea, Xander had read that it was high in vitamin C and was good for helping someone to relax enough to sleep.  He was ready to try anything to keep the dreams away and Spike couldn’t help but agree.
 
As they left the store hand in hand Spike looked fondly at his mate.  Xander had found calcium supplements safe for pregnant women that were chocolate flavored and had already eaten his daily allowance and was now bouncing along. 
 
Watching Xander did not keep him from watching out for trouble, so when he pulled at Xander’s arm the brunette knew something was up.  They quickly moved to cover each other’s back and Spike growled low. Warning off whatever it was from his boy.  Xander to his surprise was doing much the same. 
 
“Well, well, well.  What do we have here?  A couple of faggot boys in our neighborhood look like.  We’re gonna have to show these two we don’t like their kind around here, eh boys?”
 
Four human males, drunk and obviously stupid.  He had seen one of them in the store but had dismissed him from his mind.  He relaxed a bit, they could handle this.  He felt Xander’s silent laughter vibrating through him from where their shoulders touched. 
 
“My god, we’re in a big city where you can be married by an Elvis impersonator, I wonder why it’s a surprise when we run into rednecks?  Hey guys, you do know that most people have seen Deliverance and know that you protest way too much right?” 
 
“Why you…!”
 
The leader took a swing at Xander and that was the excuse Spike needed.  He rushed to intercept the blow and caught the arm, then pulled it till the big idiot lost his footing and fell to the concrete dazed.  Spike quickly disabled the two others, slamming his hand into the nose of one hard enough to kill him instantly while using the side of his hand to hit one quickly in the region of his Adam’s apple, making him pass out from the pain. 
 
He heard the crack of bone and looked to see that Xander had snapped the other’ man’s neck, his eyes showing more of the hyena than Spike had ever seen before.  His demon felt the call from its mate and reminded Spike that he was needed to protect Xander.  
 
His human face slipped as he grabbed the git who had started all this.  He let his fangs slide into the man’s neck right at the jugular and enjoyed the spray of hot fresh blood filling his mouth.  He was soon done with his impromptu meal and looked to see if Xander was upset with him. 
 
The brunette was smiling wanly and held out his hand to be held.  “I don’t think there are any cameras around in this alley but let’s go before the other two wake up and call the cops on us.”
 
Once they got back to the car and was on the road again Spike looked at his love. 
 
“You okay with that Pet?”

“Kinda too late now, besides while I may not like it, I know you have to protect me.  I was scared for a second; I mean what if one of those idiots caused me to abort or something.  And yes, eeeww.  But a part of me loved what you just did.”
 
At this admission Xander looked sick, and Spike knew if he hadn’t had killed the man he’d go back and do it again for messing with his boy. 
 
“Don’t worry Love.  Like I said earlier tonight, for some reason your hyena is closer to the surface.  You’re just reacting to that.”
 
“Right.  Don’t worry.  Easy for you to say, you didn’t eat a pig.”

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