Heat
There's probably some way of starting this that won't make you think I'm stupid or crazy- or both, but unfortunately I can't think of one just now. As it is, I'll just blame it all on the heat. I was dehydrated and woozy, and didn't have control of myself.
So that's cleared up? Good. Then I guess I'll start.
-
It was early September, and we were in Edmonton for a game. It was always quite the experience, what with al the rabid fans and weather cold enough to freeze your ass off.
Well... usually.
I woke up that morning to hear the Power 92 DJ talking about some freak heat wave rolling across Alberta. I figured it was something like twenty degrees, considering this was Canada. Piece of cake for someone who lives in Texas, right?
Wrong.
Most of the team stayed safely inside while I, stupid fuck that I am,decided to go visit an old college friend. I probably should haverun screaming after the courtesy van as soon as I stepped out. This wasn't just some wimpy, Canadian whining. This was true, sweat-inducing, brow-wiping 110-degree weather.
To top it all off, I'd given the Valet the wrong address.
So here I was, stranded in a city full of people who would gladly shoot me on the spot, with only the clothes I was wearing, a Swiss Army Knife, and a twenty-dollar bill. I did the only thing a sane man would- try and find a place that served something cool, or even lukewarm.
Easier said than done in a residential section.
That's when I saw it. At first, I thought I was hallucinating, but no amount of arm pinching and eye-rubbing could get the sight out of my head.
Standing under a sprinkler in some random person's lawn, sopping wet and unmoving, was Mike Comrie, Edmonton's own superstar. I blinked, trying to connect the dots in my now swimming head, when it struck me.
He was wet. Wet meant water.
Water meant relief.
But there was the little fact that the kid was still standing there, completely oblivious to me...
One look at the rolling heat convinced me. There was only one thing to do. "Make room for me in there." I said, making my way over to where he was standing. Even being close to the water felt good.
"No way, there's only room for one in here." He said, glaring. I don't know if it was just because I was a Star, or because he's just plain grabby.
"I am not melting because you're a greedy little fucker Comrie, so push over!" I usually pride myself on never getting mad out of a game, but he was standing between me, and the only thing that could stop the insistent burning, but I pushed him out of the sprinkler, and stepped into the cold water, closing my eyes and revelling in the sensation of cold water running down my face. There's nothing quite like it after you've almost died.
Unfortunately, he just couldn't give it up, and pushed me back out, and an all out war began. I'm not just being childish when I say that he started it, because as you can plainly see, he did by not letting me in the water in the first place.
Finally, we just both crammed in dangerously close and soaking wet, desperation to stay cool overriding the usual rivalry. I turned so I could get my back wet, which ended up being a big mistake, as I found myself nose-to-nose with none other than Comrie himself. Strangely enough, he looked incredibly hot when he was wet, hair plastered to his head and small beads of water making their way down his nose, over his cheeks and lips... I would be lying if I said he didn't have great lips... but I digress.
Anyways, I had this sudden vision of kissing him, and found myself looking into his eyes for far too long than could be a good thing. Especially since they were what finally sent me head-first over the edge, leaning down to kiss him softly...
Hey, what would you have done? Pushed him away? I think not.
Like I said, it was impossible to stop, no matter how insane it was.
He started slightly, but then began to return the kiss, carefully at first, but then with more abandon. It must have been the heat. It's the only possible explanation.
Neither of us pulled away as the cool, refreshing water rained down on us, arms wrapping around each other...
But then it was shut off.
To tell the truth, I didn't even notice until a woman's voice cut through the sudden silence with a loud cry of "Perverts!" Over Comrie's shoulder, I could see a woman standing next to her faucet, hands on her hips as she glared threateningly at us. "Get off my lawn!" So, we did the only possible thing.
We ran.
About a block later, we both stopped, too hot to go on anymore.
"What now?" He snapped, turning to glare at me. "Everything was fine before you decided to come along."
"What we need," I said, trying to get thoughts of kissing him more out of my mind, "is another water source." He rolled his eyes, but suddenly lit up.
"What?"
"There's a park near here." He said in a low whisper, as if it was sacred or something. A park, big fuckin' deal... Now if he could find a way to get something to drink in this goddamned deserted town...
"So?"
"There's a fountain." Those three, simple words were enough to give me hope. He laughed, grinning at me, and I suppressed another goddamned urge to throw him down on the road and ravish him. "Come on, it's just a block and a half away..."
That block and a half felt like eternity, but we finally made it. It was like an oasis in the desert, a fire and several sleeping bags if you were stranded in Antarctica.
He jumped in first, after apparently joining me in losing his mind and throwing off his jeans and shirt, leaving him in only his boxers. I suppose I should have been shocked or something, but the thought of something cold was overriding everything. So, stupidly, I followed suit.
In the searing heat, with no one else around, an odd truce had formed. We chased each other like old friends, splashing and falling over, acting like little children.
Then, we were close again, and I could feel him shiver. The way his lips had felt, his arms... "It must be the heat." He muttered, before placing his hands on my shoulders, pulling me down to kiss him.
Time became meaningless, everything became meaningless, except for us two, the world seemed to disappear, there was no fountain, no heat, no hockey, nothing but us...
What we didn't notice were the first late afternoon passers-by, and the television crews that began to show up to get us on video... no, it was the police that finally decided to break the moment, pulling us apart forcibly in front of the sizable crowd and the glare of the television lights.
"Excuse me sirs... but I'll have to ask you to step out of the fountain." I, after finally regaining the ability to think, turned to him with my worst glare.
"What?" Comrie asked, in a deadly tone of voice that even had me scared. I wasn't the only one, judging by the tentative step the police officer took back.
"It's... er... illegal to step into the fountain in the first place sir- plus, neither of you are decently clothed." A resounding whoop echoed from the crowd, making Comrie blush adorably. "I'll have to ask you both to step out..."
Comrie met his gaze levelly, not backing down for a second. "No." Maybe he was suffering from heat stroke and hadn't figured out that it had finally cooled down, or maybe it could mean stepping back into reality meant no more kissing.
Wait a minute, who ever said it had to mean that?
Whatever his reason was, nothing and no one was going to move us out of the fountain short of an earthquake or some such minor event.
-
So you see officer, it's just something that anyone could do, all a by-product of the heat, no damage was done. All right...
Look, could we hurry this up? I have a date tonight...