Who am I
It's a good question, don't you think? I'm just a girl from Florida. Ok, maybe that's not quite accurate. (sheesh) I'll be 31 in two days, and I suppose that makes me a bit more than just a girl. I have really been wanting a place to post my thoughts and feelings, a place where I can be completely honest about anything I please. So here I am.
Who am I? Well here are a few things I am:
I'm a mother.
I'm a wife.
I'm a lover*.
I'm a formerly fat person.
I'm a size 6-8.
I'm a runner.
I'm a singer.
I'm a pianist.
I'm a programmer.
I'm a mathematician.
I'm a Floridian.
I'm a Republican.
Whew.. that's a lot to talk about, but I suppose it's a great place to start.
I'm a mother.
I have a gorgeous 10 year old son. He was not planned for, but I thank God I have him. I love him more than life itself. He is home-schooled. He loves to play his gameboy and the X-box. He is very smart and VERY lazy. :)
I'm a wife.
I'm married to my ex-husband. Yes.. read it again. We were first married in 1993, 8 1/2 months later our son was born, we were divorced in 1996, and remarried in 1998. Why do I feel the need to explain this to everyone? Who knows. Anyway. This time around we are both committed to making it work. I love my husband very much.
I'm a lover*.
Note the asterisk. I'm a lover .. sorta. I don't actually physically cheat on my husband. I have a male friend (also married) in Idaho .. you may recall, I'm in Florida. Anyway. We have quite an attachment. I love my relationship with him. He's very non-judgemental. He makes me feel very special. I'm not quite sure how this works. I do feel a little guilt about being so close to him, but the other side of my brain says it's ok because I would never do anything to really jeapordize my relationship with my husband.
I'm a formerly fat person.
I'm a size 6-8.
I'm a runner.
Formerly Fat:
I can talk about all three of these things together. I am a formerly fat person. When I say fat, I don't mean, like 20-50 pounds overweight, I mean 140 pounds overweight! I was always heavy. No, that's not quite true. From puberty on, I was heavy. I NEVER exercised or played sports, nor was I encouraged to. I ate pretty much whatever I wanted. At 11-12 I weighed about 150-160, size 12-14. As a senior in HS I weighed about 175-180, size 14-16. College was a disaster - weight-wise. I ate Reeses Peanut-Butter Cups or Reeses Pieces and Mountain Dew for breakfast. I put on a good deal of weight from 2.5 years of college. I went up to about 230-240. In the fall of 1992 I decided I should try dieting. I cut out fried foods and switched my sodas to water one month and lost 10 pounds! I exercised (a little) and when I got married weighed about 200 pounds. Well, you know what happens when you have sex? You get pregnant. 9 months later my son was born, and I was 50 pounds heavier! I ate a lot throughout my pregnancy. Afterword, I got on Depo-Provera (NASTY STUFF) and put on another 25-30 pounds. Ok. So there I hovered, between 250 and 280 for 8 years. I thought I was just one of those fat people. Of course I tried dieting a little, and exercising a little, but I never really had much success.
Transition Time:
Ok ok how in the world am I now a size 6-8? Good question. Goodness, I had no idea I'd be yacking so much my first day :P Anyway.. Christmas of 2001 we went on a cruise and I pigged out without consequence for the last time. On January 21, 2002 I set out on a new plan. My mother had joined Weight Watchers, and lost like 4 or 5 pounds her first week. I thought, Cool. I can do that. I am forever the cheap-skate and refused to pay anyone for me to step on their scale every week. I decided that if I couldn't do this.. on my own.. I needed therapy (and the truth is, I probably did) So I read my mom's WW propaganda and started the plan. I lost 7.5 pounds my first week, 3.5 the second week, etc etc. No, I didn't lose every week, but the general trend was downward! After 2 months, I had lost 25 pounds! After 5 months, 50 pounds! At one year, 80! Now, approaching the 2 year mark, I am 134 pounds lower than my starting weight of 276.5. I now weight 142 and am wearing a size 6-8 (S/M). This is compared to my original size 26-28 (3X)
I'm a runner:
I've never run before last August. I now can run 4.5 miles! I'm trying to work up to 5. I like running. It's just me and the music, and the exercise. Exercise has become a key part of my life. As I said earlier, I NEVER exercised before. At first, 2 weeks after I started dieting, I could only do one form of exercise.. Walking. I walked 3 X a week for 30 minutes. It about killed me. But gradually I got better. I started walking a little further in those 30 minutes. I started walking for 40 minutes.. I started doing it 4 times a week. I bought a bicycle. Started riding on the weekends with my family. Couldn't go very far at first.. got better with time. After 50 pounds was gone, I decided I needed a more "routine" workout. So, I started doing Denise Austin's show, Fit and Lite. Every weekday morning at 7am for half an hour. My weight loss slowed for a bit, but I was still losing inches. It started to get easier, so I added a Tae-bo workout a couple times a week at night. Gradually I got better at all these things. Last Christmas I decided it was time for me to move on to a little more exercise, so I joined a gym. After a while I started attending the 6am classes. First, just the toning class (with free weights) twice a week. Then I got brave and tried Step class. My instructor had a miscarriage, so for a couple months I did Spinning instead of Step. Each time, I got a little better at each activity. I have gotten now to where I love Step class on Tue/Thu and I do toning on Mondays by myself after Spinning, and on Wed/Fri at class. Ok.. up to the runner bit, finally :) I started running in August. It was really more like a jog. Just until I thought I was going to pass out, and then I'd walk. I learned that at that point you think you're going to pass out, if you can just push yourself a tad bit further, you'll realize you're not really going to pass out, and you can actually go further than you thought you could. So now, on Sat and Sun mornings I run.
I'll do more tomorrow.. I had finished this thing, but somehow in my series of clicks lost the last few paragraphs. Now I'm tired and have a headache from my recent phone call with my husband. No, it's not really from the phone call, that just made it worse :P
So, I'm off for now.. I'll continue tomorrow.
