people suck
Mood:  irritated
some people seriously lack common sense. honestly, why would you schedule someone to work when they request off and there are SIX other people free?!!!!?! IDIOT adklghalkhgasl;kdhgasdlkhgalskdhgaslkhgsalkdhgalskdhgklasdhgklashdglkhsadlgkhsdalkghsadlkhgsadklhgsadklhgsaldk
and holy crap..why would you make a schedule and then change it, AFTER everyone has looked at it, AND THEN not tell anyone it's been changed. friggin' A my work is retarded.
ughhhhhhhhhh and to make these mistakes OVER AND OVER again..o-m-ffffffffffff-g what is WRONG with you, woman?!
grrr some people..

hey, it could happen
Mood:  spacey
someone seriously needs to invent a robot that does all the morning tasks. seriously, i'm so not a morning person and i HATE, with much passion, getting up at 6am and having to get ready for school. if someone (or something) did everything for me, i would wake up so much easier, it'd be SO nice. all i would have to do is turn off my alarm, which would be my favorite song of the moment playing and i would turn it off by stepping out of bed, onto the floor. then the robot (i'd name him mr. umm....mr. toqoj, mainly because that's "robot" upsidedown) would lead me to the bathroom, wash my face for me and then lead me back to my room. next hmr toqoj would pick out a really neat outfit (yippie!) and dress me, while i just stand there opening my eyes as slowly as possible, waking up oh so peacefully. then he would do my hair (real cute-like), fix me breakfast and brush my teeth (real good). then, finally, mr. toqoj would go warm up my car and put my backpack in it. by that time i would be sufficiently awake to thank mr. toqoj and make my way to school.


mannn...if only..

just stop trying
Mood:  smelly
there's always that one person in life that you try so hard to please, but never feel satisfied. you're just never smart enough, nice enough, whatever enough..actually just never like them enough. then there's that day you realize that trying to please someone who's not pleased with who you truly are just isn't worth it. you realize that you will NEVER be good enough for them and trying is just a huge waste of your time. then you decide you don't care anymore, which is a pretty good feeling. it's like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. it's relieving. you tell yourself that you're better than them and there's no reason to live up to their impractical expectations. it's a good feeling..untilllllllllllll your parents,for example, bitch at you about how you're grades aren't good enough and THEN you see that there will always be someone's expectations you must TRY to live up to. always. if there wasn't, then no one would do anything. we'd just be a world of couch potatoes. good thing people have ridiculous expectations for others. and also, good thing we care so much about what others think. it's really a noble thing to do for someone you "care" about. give them impossible standards to live up to and they will spend their whole life working hard to achieve this. now, of course, they will never be good enough for you, but they'll turn out pretty successful. it's like when they say "shoot for the moon and you'll land among the stars." good advice. except it DOES suck when you don't make it. oh well, you'll probably have a nice house or a loyal dog or something.

:)

a serious question
Mood:  lazy
after watching the movie, little black book, i wonder whether it is better to be oblivious and content with life or to find out what you don't know, but are curious about. in the movie, the main girl snoops through her bf's palm pilot and finds info on his ex-gfs along with other things that she didn't know about him. this eventually leads to their break-up. i know this is invasion of privacy, but if she could've found a more moral way to do it, should she have tried to find out more about her boyfriend, or just stayed happy in her relationship? if omission is betrayal, how will we know if we are being betrayed all the time if we don't try to find out more? if there is something you want to know, yet the answer has not made it to you by itself, should you look for it? i've always wondered this, whether it is better to stay in the dark and be happy, or to find the answer to what you're wondering. i'm sure everyone has been in a situation like this. and i guess the answer is really situational. yet, i wish there was a definite yes or no that could apply to every situation. many times there are regrets in looking for something that you could live without knowing, but, also, in many cases you are better off knowing. you might not be as happy as you were before, yet to think you didn't know whatever it is before is unbelievable. although, another outcome is that what you were looking for is what you had confidence in all along, so there really was no point in looking further. you may feel better knowing you were right, yet you often feel bad for being in doubt. for example, (and this is completely made-up) if you think your friend is cheating on their bf/gf. you are perfectly fine NOT KNOWING if they are or not, it doesn't really change your life in any way. however, you really want to know. so do you go and try and find out in order to help their bf/gf or do you stick with the confidence you have in your friend and let it go. if you do try to find out, you could ruin your friendship by betraying them. if you don't you will live with the question in the back of your mind forever. what's more important: having confidence in the person or situation, or knowing the truth? if you ask me, it's a pretty tough call. in this case, i guess the moral thing to do is trust your friend and drop it. but it's not always that easy (if that even was "easy" :-/)...
seriously, that is a REALLY tough decision. every so often a situation like that comes up and i wonder what to do. now, usually, i can't control myself and look for the answer to my question, and usually i regret it. it's never anything too important, just a waste of my time finding an answer i already knew. but one day, there will be a more serious situation i must face, and i probably won't have a clue what to do. *sigh* life is so confusing..

the end.


post script- happy 18th b'day to megan!! (tomorrow) :-D

remember?
Mood:  accident prone
you know, out of all the things you can't survive without, your memory is definitely top 3 (after caitlin's journal and the wing factory, and maybe freerunning (link is fixed) now that i've seen it). all those movies about memory(paycheck, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, 50 first dates, memento, and the list goes on) really make you wonder how anyone could live if they had NO memory whatsoever. you couldn't live. you'd forget what you were doing every single moment to the point where you couldn't get anything done. ever. that is a weird thought. no memory. you wouldn't remember why you were reading this. you wouldn't have been able to open this web page. you wouldn't be able to function. that's probably why memory illnesses suck so much. memory is just not something to fuck up. yeah.


PS-snow is probably one of my favorite things in the world. :) and i hope we get more this week.

PPS- 100 more school days till graduation!! i hope many underclassmen read this and become severely depressed at that. suckers. :-P