What Does The Bible Say?

Mike Owens
He who loves his own wife loves himself


What Is Love?

They are very family-oriented; closely bonded to individuals within the family unit. They can be exclusive, quiet people who never talk to the son, daughter or spouse; but the family relationship is important. A Melancholy says, I love you by being dependable and responsible, not in physical terms such as hugging, touching and holding. Melancholies are task-oriented as opposed to relationship-oriented. They see life as a goal to achieve. Because the Melancholy is intelligent they can predict pitfalls in a project before they undertake it. They tend to be good supervisors so long as they are comfortable within the area they are attempting to manage. They are also very creative like musicians and artists; and are prone to deep depression.

Melancholies tend to be perfectionists and set very high standards for themselves and for the people around them. They are extremely private and very serious people. They are self-motivated and do not respond to the promise of reward nor the threat of punishment. They are loyal and faithful friends, true to their word - if they make a promise, they will keep it. It is their tendency to be self-sacrificing for the people with whom they are close. Then too, they are very self-sacrificing to mankind as a whole.

Inclusion Strengths: introvert, loner, great thinker, genius-prone, very artistic and creative, often found alone in thought, perfectionistic, slow-paced, great understanding of tasks and systems, a critical and challenging mind, and seeing both the pitfalls and the end results of a project undertaken.

Inclusion Weaknesses: extremely moody, suffer from black depressions, reject people, set standards neither they nor anyone else can meet, develop habits that are very hard to break, have suicidal tendencies, low self-esteem and are pessimistic.

Control Strengths: good at decisions and responsibilities in known areas, very good leadership abilities. They adhere to the rules and they need very little control over the lives and behavior of others.

Control Weaknesses: rigid, inflexible, sensitive to failure, fear of the unknown, fear of failure, apt to be a rebel and procrastinate.

Affection Strengths: very faithful, loyal friends and self-sacrificing. Their feelings run deep and tender (even through they lack the ability to express these feelings). They easily empathize with others and have the ability to make very deep commitments.

Affection Weaknesses: They dissect the past with theoretical what ifs, i.e., what if he had given me flowers, I would feel loved; what if I were prettier, they would love me more. Also, they are critical of others, angry, cruel, vengeful, emotional, rarely tell people how they feel, have a low self-image and are sensitive to rejection from deep relationships. The loss of a deep relationship (even by death) is devastating to them. They are sexually oriented but not romantically inclined. They have sex with their spouse; they do not make love to them. This causes marital problems.

The Supine

The Supine temperament is the servant’s heart. Thus the name Supine, which means with the face upwards; like a servant looking up to his/her master.

Inclusion Strengths: a great capacity for service, liking people, and the desire to serve others. They possess an inborn gentle spirit.

Inclusion Weaknesses: indirect behavior that expects others to read their mind, high fear of rejection, and harboring anger viewed as ‘hurt feelings’.

Control Strengths: dependability, ability to enforce the policies set by others and to serve those they follow with absolute loyalty.

Control Weaknesses: aggressive disorders, open dependence, defensive against loss of position, weak willpower, a tendency to feel powerless and at the mercy of others.

Affection Strengths: the ability to respond to love and to open up emotionally when they feel emotionally safe. If treated properly, they are capable of absolute and total commitment to deep personal relationships.

Affection Weaknesses: the inability to initiate love and affection. The require constant reassurance that they are loved, needed and appreciated. The Supine temperament is a beautiful temperament; it naturally has the servant’s heart.

So why did I bring this up? It is historically significant that individuals tend to select certain types. A woman will continually select a man who will abuse her, once she is in an abusive relationship. Rapists select their victims because their victims portray being the victim. Why is this so? Perhaps, since we are spiritual beings above all and formost, we naturally select things on a spiritual basis. We see the other person's temperament, and realize that this is what we are looking for, so we are attracted to this individual. This may be a positive attraction (to our benefit) or a negative attraction (through our own feelings of unworthiness). With this consideration, can we not choose a better lover by living off our strengths? This is just an idea to think about.