"Mon Ami"
to the tune of "Fernando" by the multi-talented ABBA

It's close-up shot, mon ami
I am wond'ring why that blouse button on top is, well, undone
It's a microphone, mon ami
Would you please refrain from screaming "Oh Dear God!" into my ear
I can hear five hundred nuns
All fall upon the floor; we'll start an earthquake here

It's a turtleneck, mon ami
And her eyes look clear and sky-blue when she sees the young boy's scar
I was blown away, mon ami
When her thoughtful frown turned to disgust with Smokey in her car
And I must admit the 'do
Is looking good; some mousse instead of gel goes far

(chorus)
There's just something in the way she sighs
Or rolls her eyes, mon ami
Watch her put ole Spender in his place
No-nonsense face, mon ami
And I always like to see her drive
Drive me insane...
Uh yeah scuse me if you wouldn't mind
I must rewind, mon ami

Now we've watched five times, mon ami
And I think it's about time for us to disengage the "mute"
Are we shallow gals, mon ami?
Is it wrong for us to sit and chat at length on how DK is such a beaut
Surely if we think real hard
We'll find a mytharc bit, an insight damn astute

(chorus)
Like, uh, something about holy grails
The tape she mails, mon ami
Deep stuff regarding her moral plight
What's true; what's right? mon ami
Though distracting as her lips may be
I can talk plot
If I must ignore those jammies, well...
I CAN'T.  Oh hell.  Mon ami...

There's just magic in her measured stare
And tousled hair, mon ami
When in evening wear the screen she crossed
Nine minutes lost, mon ami
Though I protest I watch for the script
Well I saw CHarc
Pardon me while I just pause right there
Shot of good hair, mon ami
Hey please give back my remote -- no fair!
Don't make me swear!  Non ami...

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