INT. FBI HEARING CHAMBER 
Scully sits across from a panel of Assistant Directors, 
Skinner and Kersh among them. In a chair behind and 
slightly to Scully's right sits a MAN. Not just any man, 
but a man the manliness of whom even stoic Scully can't ignore. 

SKINNER 
Agent Scully, it's time for you to meet your new partner. 

KERSH 
Agent John Doggett. 

Scully turns slightly in her chair as This Man, this Man
 Doggett, stands, testosterone-esque manliness wafting 
from him. 

The lights dim, and an orchestra begins playing from 
out of nowhere. Skinner, Kersh, and the Chorus of 
Assistant Directors breaks into song, to the tune of 
Gilbert and Sullivan's "He is an Englishman" from H.M.S. Pinafore. 

SKINNER 
John Doggett, poor and lowly born 
A cop of working class position 
The butt of all X-Philedom's scorn 
The mark of Internet derision 
Has dared to fill the Punkish shoes 
Of him who has Our Saint's devotion 
Let Doggett's glorious pride arise: 
He is a Manly Man - behold him! 

CHORUS OF ASSISTANT A.D.S 
He is a Manly Man! 

SKINNER 
He is a Manly Man! 
For CC himself has said it, 
It's in the script (Autumn has read it) 
Doggett is a Manly Man! 

CHORUS OF ASSISTANT A.D.S 
Doggett is a Manly Man! 

KERSH 
Neither wuss, nor dunce, nor punk is he. 
A fitting match for Scully 
He is not a wimpy man! 

CHORUS OF ASSISTANT A.D.S 
He is not a wimpy man! 

SKINNER AND KERSH 
So in keeping with a stereotype 
We declare 'mid all the TV hype 
That he is a Manly Man! 
John Doggett is a Ma-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-anly Man! 

The lights come back up, Skinner, Kersh, and the 
Chorus of Assistant A.D.s take their seats. 

SCULLY 
(eyeing Doggett inscrutably) 
Is there anything else, sir? 

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