Woke Up This Morning

By

Stefanie Acela

 

Monday morning.  Raven, Rebecca, Zia, Heather, Jonathan, and Alexander are heading to school in Rebecca’s Vista Cruiser.  “Woke Up This Morning (Chosen One Mix)” by A3 is playing in the stereo.  Right now, the group are somewhere on Lawndale’s highway system, which might as well be Washington DC’s beltway.

 

Rebecca:  Did we take a wrong turn into DC?

Raven:  Are there any idiots pulling to the side of the road and walking to work?

Rebecca:  I wonder if that happens in Lawndale, too.  This is my first time driving on these roads, and it looks rather scary.

Zia:  As long as you break the speed limit like everyone else, you don’t have to worry about it.

Rebecca:  Good point [pushes down on the gas, taking the car from 65 to 85 MPH].

Alexander:  [Reading a certain teen magazine] Oh-my-god!  Look at Justin Timberlake!  Oh!  He’s sooooo dreamy!

Jonathan:  [Looks at the magazine in disgust] What the hell is that?

Alexander:  It’s Val!  It’s, like, the coolest teen magazine ever!

Jonathan:  Really? [Scoffs] Looks more like a piece of crap to me.

Alexander:  Oh, like, how would you know, Jon?  You’re just jealous because the guys in here are hotter than you!

Jonathan:  Oh, is that so?  For your information, Alex, Val has got to be the most shallow, image-oriented piece of trash ever printed.  Their goal is to screw up young girls by thinking that if they don’t look like some anorexic, brain dead twit who looks like the bride of Rob Zombie, then those poor girls will be lost souls.

Alexander:  [Puts down magazine and makes “Whatever” sign] What-ever!  Hey Becca!  What do you think about these hot guys?

 

Alexander holds up magazine in Rebecca’s rear-view mirror, causing her to panic and swerve into the far left lane.

 

Rebecca:  [After regaining composure]  Alex, could you not do that again, please?  Hitting guardrails and other cars like it’s a demolition derby wasn’t in my daily planner today.

Alexander:  Sorry.

Heather:  Isn’t Val the great white dope who thinks she’s a teenager?

Rebecca:  Hold on a minute [listens to a questionable part of “Woke Up This Morning”].  Okay.  He said, “Shave my body.”

Raven:  No, Becca, he didn’t.

Rebecca:  Hello?  He did!

Raven:  No, he said, “Shake my body.”

Rebecca:  Um, dear.  He said “Shave my body,” not “shake.”

Raven:  Okay, suppose he really did say that.  Why would he need to shave his body?

Rebecca:  He needs to shave because he needs to be clean.

Raven:  Couldn’t he just take a shower?

Rebecca:  Well, maybe a shower isn’t good enough to get him clean.

Raven:  And by shaving his body, he will be cleansed of what, exactly?

Rebecca:  He’ll be cleansed of all negative energy from doing all of those mob activities.

Raven:  Becca, the song’s not even about that.

Rebecca:  I know that, but maybe the narrator is the one in need of the shaving.

Heather:  [While Raven and Rebecca continue their discussion] O-kay.  So…

Zia:  About Val being the great white dope?

Heather:  Yeah!  I mean, what kind of a moron is she?!

Zia:  Tell me about it!  Do you remember how she reviewed our album?

Jonathan:  Oh god, don’t remind me.  “The Wake is a really jiggy album made by really edgy teens.  If you like depressing music that’s cool, then Sundown is the band for you.  They’re really wack!”  If you ask me, I’d like to “wack” her in the head with a frying pan!

Heather:  You know what the sad part is?  That was the entire review!  I mean, c’mon!  At least listen to the damn album or something before writing about it [sighs in frustration]!

Zia:  You know what’s even sadder?  The fact that Val is nothing more than a teen journal written by an airhead who’s 30.

Jonathan:  Fuhgeddaboutit!  Rolling Stone writes better stuff than that garbage over there.

Heather:  Reader’s Digest is better than that garbage over there.

Alexander:  Aww, you guys are just a bunch of whiners.  I mean, just look at the super-cool pics [holds up magazine and shows it around]!

Zia:  Yeah.  The super-cool pics with Val in every single damn shot.

Heather:  I bet a day-old doughnut looks better than Val.

Jonathan:  Speaking of doughnuts, hey Raven, Becca, can we stop by somewhere and pick up some breakfast?  Heather and I didn’t have time this mornin’.

Rebecca:  It’s just as well.  I can’t think straight with all of these cars around me on the freeway.

Jonathan:  Freeway my ass!  We had to pay just to use this clogged vein.  I wouldn’t be surprised if Lawndale dies from a heart attack ‘cuz of this.

Raven:  You’d figure turnpikes would allow more freedom.  Oh well.  [Sees road sign ahead] Hey, let’s turn off here and go check out that BP station they just put up.  I bet they have something there to eat.

Rebecca:  Okay.  I need to put more gas in the tank anyway.

 

The gang exit the beltway and pull into the BP station/truck stop for doughnuts and gas.  Rebecca pulls the car up to the first available pump and shuts off the engine.  All exit the car.

 

Rebecca:  Wow!  This place certainly looks nice!  You guys go on ahead and I’ll meet you inside.  Don’t take too long, though; we have to put in a long day in hell and we can’t be late.

 

The rest of the group all go inside the BP convenience store/restaurant to check it out.

 

Jonathan:  This place sure is fancy!

Alexander:  Uh, it’s a convenience store, not Chez Pierre.

Jonathan:  Yeah, but does Chez Pierre have a hot dog rotisserie like that [points at a hot dog rotisserie similar to those found at carnivals]?

Alexander:  [Sighs in frustration] I’m going to look at the magazines [walks over to the news stand].

 

At the other end of the store...

 

Zia:  Maybe we should grab some soda for our lunch today.

Raven:  Hmm, are you sure we just need soda?

Heather:  He’s right!  We need, like, chips or somethin’.

 

After using her gas card at the pay pump, Rebecca moves the car to a parking spot in front of the store, then goes inside.

 

Rebecca:  [Spots Jonathan] Hey Jon!  What do you have there?

Jonathan:  A hot dog.  Forget doughnuts, this is my breakfast.

Alexander:  A hot dog for breakfast?!  Eeeewwww!

Jonathan:  Oh, you got a better idea, Quinn Jr.?

Alexander:  Duh, Jonathan!  Cereal!  Doughnuts!  Anything but that!  And stop calling me Quinn Jr., okay?!

Jonathan:  Sure, Sandi Sr.

Alexander:  [In frustration] Ooooohhh!

Raven:  [Coming from other end of store with Heather and Zia] Hey Becca.  We got some stuff for lunch today.  Hope you like Munchos [hands her a Grab Bag of Munchos].

Rebecca:  You know I do, sweetie [leaves to buy a hot dog].

 

Zia and Heather make catcalls to Raven.

 

Raven:  [While grinning with embarrassment] Oh stop!

Zia:  I bet she has a crush on you, sweetie.

Heather:  Yeah, Raven.  I bet she wants to take you on a trip.

Zia:  Around the world and back.

Heather/Zia: [Sings] And you don’t have to move--you just sit still [giggles].

Raven:  [Shakes his head while still grinning with embarrassment]  Shut up!

Zia:  C’mon.  Let’s go get some hot dogs for breakfast.

Heather:  Yeah!  Hot dogs rule!

 

Back out on the highway, with the song back on the stereo...

 

Heather:  So, where did you find that song, anyway?

Rebecca:  Oh, someone from some record company sent over a promo copy of The Sopranos soundtrack to our new office a week ago.

Raven:  And we’ve been listening to it ever since.

Jonathan:  [Eyeing Alexander’s new magazine] What’s that?

Alexander:  It’s the new issue of Val!

Jonathan:  You just can’t help yourself, can you?

Alexander:  As if [starts flipping through the magazine]!

Jonathan:  Fuhgeddaboutit!

Zia:  Hey, do you remember when Daria had to put up with that twit for an entire day?

Heather:  Tell me about it!  It was so pathetic just seeing her trying to fit in with us that it was funny.

Jonathan:  Too funny [all but Alexander laugh; he scowls at everyone]!

Rebecca:  [Stops laughing and regains composure] It’s too bad Daria didn’t go with Val to New York, though.

Jonathan:  Yeah.  She could’ve met our Uncle Tony while he was on business.

Heather:  Tony Jr. and Meadow would’ve hit it off with Daria, too!  [Wistfully] If she only had the chance.

Raven:  At least we don’t have to deal with the great white dope anytime ever.

Rebecca:  What a national nightmare that would be [all but Alexander laugh again; Alex’s mouth drops at what he sees in the magazine; Rebecca notices him in the rear-view mirror]!  Alex?  You okay back there?

Alexander:  [Slowly] Oh... my... god.

Jonathan:  What is it?  It’s not Ricky Martin, is it?

Alexander:  No.  No, it’s not.

Rebecca:  Well, do you want to share the note with the rest of the class or what?

Alexander:  You won’t believe this, guys.

Heather:  Tell us already, Alex!

Alexander:  [Quickly] We’re going to be on the cover of Val next month!

Rebecca:  WHAT?!

 

Rebecca jerks the wheel of the Vista Cruiser and quickly exits stage left into a ditch.  The crew panics as the Cruiser then heads down the hill onto the underpass near Lawndale High.  They go across the highway, swerve a hard left, go off-road again, and finally stop right next to the fence that separates the highway from the LHS football field.  The crew immediately exits the Cruiser.

 

Jonathan:  This is your fault, Alex!

Alexander:  My fault?!  Becca’s the one who freaked out and nearly got us killed!

Heather:  Well, if you hadn’t scared us like that, Becca wouldn’t have gone down the bunny trail and crash into a goddamn fence!

Rebecca:  Will all of you please shut the f--k up [everyone goes quiet]?!  Alex, where the hell does it say that we’re going to be on the cover of Val?

Alexander:  [As he hands magazine to Rebecca] Right in the back page, under Coming Next Month in Val...

Zia:  I’m gonna be sick [throws up on the grass].

Rebecca:  [Reading out loud] “Val goes back to Lawndale to spend a day with depression rockers, Sundown!  It’s gonna be totally wack!”

Raven:  And I’m gonna totally yack the next time I hear “wack” used in a sentence.  Who did this to us?

 

All glare at Alexander.

 

Alexander:  Excuse me, but I didn’t put a call into Val to have her interview us!

Rebecca: Well somebody did, and I know it wasn’t any of us.

Heather:  Yeah!  We all hate Val... [glaring at Alex] well, almost all of us, anyway.

Alexander:  I swear, you guys!  It wasn’t me!

Jonathan:  Yeah?!  Well, when I find the creep who did this to us, I’m gonna bust their friggin’ legs!

Rebecca:  No one is going to be busting any “friggin’ legs,” Jon.  Let’s just calm down and go to school, okay?

Raven:  [Looking through fence] Isn’t that our football field?

 

All gather to see and confirm the findings.  They also notice that the Cruiser took out a part of the fencing, which is now behind the car.

 

Rebecca:  [Realizing what just happened] Uh-oh.

Jonathan:  That looks really bad.

Zia:  I hope no one saw us do that.

Heather:  No one from our school, you mean.

Raven:  What are we going to do?

Rebecca:  Let’s just get our things and walk to school.

Alexander:  Will the Cruiser still be here when we get back?

Rebecca:  Don’t worry about it, Alex.  I’ll call a tow truck during lunch and have them check it out.

Alexander:  What about the fencing?  Ms. Li’s going to kill us if she finds out what we just did!

Jonathan:  Fuhgeddaboutit!  Ms. Li’s got plenty of money.  Let’s just go, okay?

Rebecca:  Let’s.  Oh, Alex, bring this with you [hands the magazine to him by hitting him in the chest with it].

 

The group grab their backpacks from the back of the Cruiser and duck under the gap created when the car struck the fence.

 

Lawndale High School.  Hallway.  Daria and Jane are at Daria’s locker discussing Sundown’s upcoming concert.

 

Jane:  So, Daria, are you going to the concert in High Hills Park next month?

Daria:  I think I’ll pass.

Jane:  Oh, come on, Daria!  It’ll be fun!

Daria:  As much as I like Sundown, I don’t think I’m up to seeing two concerts in a row from them.

Jane:  You’ll change your mind when you find out who the opening act is [holds up a poster designed by her; Daria reads it and becomes a little excited]!

Daria:  Trent?!  I thought his band wasn’t good enough to be on Sundown’s indie label, let alone share the same stage with them.

Jane:  It may be awhile before they are, but they have been working very hard recently, so they’ve earned the right to open for the gods of hard gothic metallic dance music.

Daria:  I guess competition does allow for improvement, even among the dead.

 

As Daria and Jane continue to talk, Mr. O’Neill spots them and quickly walks over to them.

 

Mr. O’Neill:  [Urgently] Daria, Jane, I was wondering if you two have seen Raven, Rebecca, and their friends.  I really need to talk to them before class starts!

 

Sundown turn down the corner and make their way towards their lockers when Daria, Jane, and Mr. O’Neill spot them.

 

Jane:  Well, look who’s here!

Mr. O’Neill:  [To the group] Oh guys!  I’m so glad you guys are here today!

Rebecca:  Well, we’re glad to see you, too!

Jonathan:  To what do we owe the honour of your presence?

Mr. O’Neill:  I have such excellent news for your band!  I... oh, I’m so excited that I forgot that I can’t tell you this in public.  [To Daria and Jane] Sorry Jane, Daria, but I can only tell this news to them [whisks the band to the faculty lounge].

Jane:  Wow!  It must be something really special if only those guys can know about it!

Daria:  I have a feeling we’re about to go through something really wrong again.

Jane:  Oh Daria, you worry too much.

 

Meanwhile, in the faculty lounge...

 

Mr. O’Neill:  You won’t believe who’s waiting for us to call her!  It’s... it’s Val!  You know, the Val!

Rebecca:  Oh, you mean the one who writes that very wrong teen magazine?

Mr. O’Neill:  That’s the one!

Jonathan:  [To Rebecca] I don’t think he heard the “wrong” part.

Mr. O’Neill:  Anyway, Val is coming to Lawndale to spend an entire week with all of you!

Sundown:  WHAT?!

Mr. O’Neill:  I know exactly how you feel.  I would be shocked, too, if a big teen magazine editor came here to interview me.  You must feel really lucky to have such an honour [starts dialing telephone]!

Heather:  [Under her breath] Yeah, really f’ing lucky.

Raven:  [To Heather] I hear ya.  [To Mr. O’Neill] So, how did you manage to hook us up with the fruitcake?

Mr. O’Neill:  Hold on a minute.  [To person on other end of phone] Yes, this is Mr. O’Neill, Sundown’s English teacher.  Is Val there?  Of course, I’ll hold.  [To group] Well, while all of you were touring with Britney Spears--great performance, by the way!

Sundown:  [Calmly] Thanks.  No problem.

Mr. O’Neill:  Anyway, while you were out, I sent some of your promo CDs and materials to the magazines you had on your list of respectable publications.

Zia:  And?

Mr. O’Neill:  And, when I saw Val in your list of “pondlife” publications, I was a little shocked that you wouldn’t share your art with her, let alone anyone else on that list, so...

Rebecca:  [Interrupting] So, you let your heart get in the way of our edict and you mailed promos to everybody on our lists, even Val, right?

Mr. O’Neill:  Yes!  But then, I receive a call from Val a few weeks later, and we start talking about you and all of the neat things about you!  The next thing I know, I’m setting up a meeting with her, and now... [Val picks up phone] Oh my gosh, it’s Val! [Talking to Val] Yes, they’re all right here, and they’re just dying to talk to you!  [To group] Who wants it?

Rebecca:  I’ll take it[takes phone and starts talking to Val].  Hi!  I’m fine.  Yeah, we’re all big fans of your work, especially our electronics master, Alexander [Alex bounces when Rebecca mentions his name to Val; the rest of the group just look at him in a confused manner].  Well, we can’t stop you.  I guess we’ll see you in a week.  Okay.  Bye-bye [hangs up phone].  [To everyone] Well, it looks like we’re going to have company next week.  God help us all.

Mr. O’Neill:  Now, we have to keep this a secret.  Val doesn’t want anyone to know she’s coming.  Oh Rebecca, gang, we did it!  We’re going to spread the positive message of Sundown to a broader audience [hugs Rebecca way too tightly]!

Rebecca:  [Muffled, while patting Mr. O’Neill’s back] That’s great, Mr. O’Neill, but you’re crushing my solar plexus!

Mr. O’Neill:  [Quickly releases her] Sorry!

 

Hallway.  Later in the day.  Raven and Rebecca are with Daria and Jane at Raven’s locker discussing Val’s imminent return to Lawndale.

 

Rebecca:  I can’t believe Mr. O’Neill did that to us.

Raven:  We gave him a job, and he didn’t exactly obey orders.

Jane:  I don’t know.  Maybe he’s doing you a favour by sending those promos to the “pondlife.”

Rebecca:  In what way?

Daria:  I guess he just wants you to do well in your career, and by sending your music to magazines like Val, you’ll have a wider audience.

Rebecca: I don’t know if I want that kind of audience, though.

Jane:  What do you mean?  You toured with Britney Spears!

Daria:  Yeah.  You basically played your music to the same audience who reads vapid teen magazines like Val.

Rebecca:  And that’s why we made that list of magazines!

Raven:  So we could avoid attracting the wrong crowd.

Daria:  That still doesn’t explain why you spent your summer with America’s teen pop princess.

Rebecca:  Well, I-I-I had a crush on Britney at the time, and after I spent some time with her, I just fell in love with her personality.

Raven:  Besides, Britney loved our work and wanted us to tour with her.

Rebecca:  We just couldn’t refuse that opportunity of a lifetime!

Raven:  And we ended up taking in some of her fans into our Dominion.

Jane:  I guess that makes sense, but that still doesn’t explain why you didn’t want to send your work to Val and others like her.

Rebecca:  It’s because we want our Dominion to expand due to their appreciation of our work and of us, not because they saw us on some vapid teen ‘zine and just decided to hop aboard.

Raven:  It would eventually ruin the fan base and us.

Rebecca:  But, I guess we can survive this.

Raven:  If Sleater-Kinney can, then so can we.

Daria:  I guess.

Ms. Li:  [Over PA system] Will Ms. Milano please come into my office for a normal, everyday, routine conference?  This is so exciting [giggles]!

Rebecca:  Hmm.  I wonder why she just wants to talk to me?

Raven:  Well, maybe it is just about you.

Rebecca:  I guess.  Well, I’ll see you later [heads off to Ms. Li’s office]!

Raven/Daria/Jane:  See ya!

 

In Ms. Li’s office...

 

Ms. Li:  It’s so exciting to hear that Val is coming to Lawndale next week!  I just can’t wait another minute!

Rebecca:  Uh, how did you find out about that?  It was supposed to be a secret.

Ms. Li:  [Quickly] Security cameras.  [Normal pace] Anyway, in honour of this major event, I came up with this schedule of events for her stay during the coming week [hands Rebecca a paper].

Rebecca:  [Reading] Monday-School Colours Day.  Tuesday-Come As You Are Day.  La la la... la.  Friday-Sundown Appreciation Day?

Ms. Li:  Oh yes.  On that day, everyone will dress in “gothic” attire...

Rebecca:  We’re not goth.

Ms. Li:  And your band will be holding a special concert/dance later that evening.

Rebecca:  I see.  And why are we playing this “dance?”

Ms. Li:  Well, I figured that it would be easier to rake in the money needed for a new fence by holding a dance, instead of having you and your band repair the old one.

Rebecca:  You saw that?

Ms. Li:  Yes, so you have no choice but to play, for the glory of Lawndale High.

Rebecca:  Okay.  So, why didn’t you call in the rest of my friends?

Ms. Li:  I figured it would be easier to talk to one of you, and since you’re the head of the band, well, why not you?  Besides, I can’t have six people in the same room with me in it at the same time--damn fire codes!

 

Saturday morning.  Lane house.  Raven, Rebecca, Jane, and Daria are in Jane’s room.  Trent is still asleep.  Jane is painting and Daria is watching Sick Sad World, and Raven and Rebecca are arguing over some certain lyrics.

 

SSW Announcer:  A math genius perfects nuclear fusion, but without a brain!  How’s that possible?  Brainless mathematics, next on Sick Sad World!

Raven:  Okay, so you’re saying that he would shave his body to rid himself of the bad karma?

Rebecca:  Well, yeah.

Raven:  I think he could do that by just shaking his body.

Rebecca:  You just can’t shake bad karma like that off your body, Raven.  You have to shave it off!

Raven:  With what?  Some kind of cosmic razor?

Rebecca:  A karmic razor.

Daria:  [Eavesdropping] I bet that’s what King Gillette had in mind when he invented the disposable razor.

Rebecca:  See!  Daria agrees with me.

Daria:  Actually, I...

Raven:  I think Daria is saying that you’re nuts.

Daria:  Well...

Rebecca:  Daria did not say I was nuts.  She thinks you’re nuts!

Jane:  I’m nuts, you’re nuts, we’re all nuts, let’s call the whole thing off!

Daria:  [Seeing painting] What’s that?

Jane:  Just an interpretation of their argument, with an added twist.

Raven:  Hmm.  You’ve managed to put Val in concrete shoes with a razor to some guy, or… guys?

Jane:  Yeah.  I had to put the two of you in somehow.

Rebecca:  That reminds me.  Daria, you’ve had experience with Val, correct?

Daria:  Enough to know how much of a nut job she is.

Rebecca:  Good.  Can you come with Raven and me to C’est La Veal tonight?  Val’s coming here this afternoon, and we’ve made reservations.

Daria:  Why can’t the rest of your band come?

Raven:  Zia’s with her parents on a camping trip--they left yesterday, Heather and Jonathan are going to see the Redskins game against Pittsburgh, and Alex is going clubbing.

Rebecca:  Though Alex would really love to come with us to meet [with awe] his heroine [bats her eyes]!

Raven:  I’m surprised he doesn’t shoot her up by now.

Daria:  Now that’s something I’d like to see.

Rebecca:  You know what?  So would I.  Raven, could you call Alex and tell him to change his plans.

Raven:  Sure [grabs phone and dials Alex].

Rebecca:  Okay, so, as I was asking, will you please come?  I don’t want to deal with her alone.

Daria:  I don’t know...

Rebecca:  Jane, you can come, too.

Jane:  Cool.  Will I need a dress, because I don’t have one.

Rebecca:  Don’t worry.  I have some things you can wear.

Jane:  Cool.

Rebecca:  Now, what else will it take to get you to go?

Daria:  Well, I guess I can come along.

Rebecca:  Great!  Let’s see... We have you, me, Raven, Jane, Mr. O’Neill, Trent...

Daria:  Trent?!

Rebecca:  Yeah!  I’ve heard his band lately, and I think it may be time to expand the Nightwind family.

Raven:  Hey Becca!  Alex is coming with us tonight, if he can find the right things to wear.

Rebecca:  Which is why I’m also inviting Quinn.  Those two seem to be able to get it together when they’re together.

Daria:  With half-a-brain each, I don’t see why not.

Jane:  At least they’ll be talking to each other tonight.

Rebecca:  Rock.

 

Saturday Evening.  Outside Raven’s home.  Rebecca pulls the Cruiser up to the curb, and then steps out.  She has on a classic black dress, low-heeled black polished leather dress shoes... well, think Audrey Hepburn with a ‘90s flair.  Anyway, she walks up the door and rings the bell.  Raven opens the door.

 

Rebecca:  Hello, my sweet.

Raven:  [In awe] Hi!  Wow!  You look beautiful!

Rebecca:  Thank you.  I love how you look, too.

Raven:  [Smiles] Yeah.  It’s kinda hard to find a ‘30s gangster outfit in women’s sizes.

Rebecca:  Well, you look very cute in it.

Raven:  Thanks.  Ready?

Rebecca:  When you are.

 

Raven and Rebecca walk over to her car, arm-in-arm.  Raven then opens the driver’s side door for Rebecca, and finally he climbs in on the passenger side.  Rebecca then turns on the stereo, and “Twilight Zone” by Golden Earring starts playing.

 

Raven:  So, who are we picking up first?

Rebecca:  Alex and Quinn are at Daria’s house, so they’re first.  Then we go over to Jane’s to pick up Daria, Jane, Tom, and Trent.

Raven:  Cool.

 

Later that evening, the group is waiting for Val to arrive in C’est La Veal.  They are seated at a table in a private area overlooking the lake. The arrangement, going clockwise, is an empty chair at the 12 o’clock position, which is facing the outdoor entrance, for Val, then Rebecca, Raven, Daria, Quinn, Alexander, Trent, Tom, Jane, and another empty chair for Mr. O’Neill.

 

Trent:  Wow!  This is a really great place.  I bet it’s expensive, too.

Jane:  Yeah.  How did you two pay for this?

Rebecca:  Oh, Val’s footing the bill.

Raven:  Well, before Val and Mr. O’Neill arrive, the two of us have something to tell you, Trent.

Rebecca:  Trent, when you go home tonight, call your bandmates, because you and your group are our first signees to Nightwind [all applaud the news]!

Trent:  Thanks.  When do we start recording?

Raven:  Can your group start after this next week, considering our arriving situation?

Trent:  Sure.

Jane:  Looks like we’ll soon no longer have to worry about paying the bills around the house, now that we have a rock star waiting in the wings!

Tom:  Maybe you can do your brother’s first album cover.

Trent:  Will you do it, Janie?

Jane:  Why not?  I have some photos I took for Sundown’s debut lying around.   We might be able to come up with some ideas from there.

Trent:  Cool.

Daria:  [Checking watch] When’s Val going to be here?

Tom:  Who’s Val?

Jane:  Some crazy teen magazine editor who thinks she’s still a teenager.

Daria:  If you consider 35 as still being a teenager.

Quinn:  [Staring out onto the lake] Isn’t this great, Alex?  We get to go to a really cool French restaurant overlooking a moonlit lake... [sighs] Isn’t it romantic?

Alexander:  Yeah.  It’s too bad that it’s kinda ruined with our friends being here and all.

Quinn:  Yeah, that does kinda ruin it.

Alexander:  I’m so excited that Val’s coming here to Lawndale again!

Quinn:  Well, to be quite honest, Val wasn’t exactly right in the head.

Alexander:  What do you mean?  I think she’s the coolest!

Quinn:  You’ll see what I mean when she arrives.

 

A few minutes later...

 

Raven:  Is she supposed to be fashionably late, or just late?

Rebecca:  No kidding!  She was supposed to be here at seven, and now it’s eight!

Daria:  Maybe she’s still trying to choose which lip gloss to wear with her Sundown baby-tee.

Raven:  I guess.

 

Rebecca looks up from the table and spots Mr. O’Neill entering the restaurant.  She motions to him to come over quickly.

 

Mr. O’Neill:  Wow!  You all are certainly dressed to the nines tonight!

Rebecca:  Take the seat next to Jane, Mr. O’Neill [he sits down].

Raven:  So, where’s Val, Mr. O’Neill?

Mr. O’Neill:  She said that she’ll be here in thirty minutes.

Rebecca:  I see.  Okay, well, I’m going to freshen up.  [To Raven] I’ll be right back, sweetie [gets up, kisses Raven on the cheek, and goes to the restroom].

 

All make catcalls to Raven as soon as Rebecca is out of sight.

 

Jane:  Ooooh, Raven!  It looks like she wants you.

Raven:  [Embarrassed] Noooo!  She’s just being really nice, that’s all.

Quinn:  Oh come on, Raven!  I can tell just by the way she looks at you that she wants you.

Raven:  [Still embarrassed] I don’t know.

Tom:  I say you should go for it.

Trent:  Yeah.  You two would make quite a couple.

Daria:  You two would be the envy of the most popular couple at Lawndale High.

Alexander:  I know you two would not only be the most popular couple, but possibly the sexiest couple in Lawndale, girlfriend!

Mr. O’Neill:  I don’t know if they should be the envy of everyone at our school, guys.  Jealousy is a very scary thing to see, and very destructive.  I think Raven and Rebecca should set a positive example of what a couple could be, rather than compete against another.

Quinn:  The real world doesn’t work that way, Mr. O’Neill.  Raven, be honest with us.  Do you have feelings for her, or not?

Raven:  [Blushing] Oh my!  All of you are playing matchmaker for me... I don’t know what to say [pauses for a minute]!  Okay, I do have feelings for her.  I mean, I’ve known her all of my life.  She’s my true best friend.  We’ve done a lot together, and we’ve been through a lot together.  Hell, we even have our parents’ deaths in common.  I’m just afraid that if I ask her to be my lover, and if something goes wrong, we won’t be able to be friends after the breakup.

Mr. O’Neill:  They say that the best relationships start out as friendships.  I think you two may actually be more than just friends.

Raven:  Like soul mates?

Mr. O’Neill:  Actually, more like twin flames.  I read this book recently, and it said that sometimes a reincarnated soul will split into two or more pieces, in order to gain more experience before returning to the astral plane.  Those are known as twin flames.

Raven:  So you’re saying that Becca and I are the same soul, and we just happen to arrive back here nearly four months apart?

Mr. O’Neill:  Yes!  That’s exactly what I’m saying, Raven!

Tom:  I don’t understand this new age stuff Mr. O’Neill is telling you, but he is right about how friendships can lead to some of the best relationships anyone can have.

Raven:  So, I should ask her to be my lover?

All Others:  YES!!

Raven:  Well, it is working out for John and Christine of Boss Hog--hell, they’re married--so why not the two of us!

Mr. O’Neill:  That’s the spirit!