Busyness
Mood:  caffeinated
Its all been busy busy busy lately.
Stu has a new job and is living at my mums so im barely ever home anymore. I also actually have a job leaving less time to be at home and so my time spent on the internet is somewhat diminished for the meantime. When I am home my dad seems to be constantly on the phone and we dont have broadband yet which makes things awkward and annoying. However all will be good when we get the net on our newly aquired laptop which Stu so kindly brought for us! I will then have more time and resources to update my entire site with (including a photo section and a pets corner)
Until I return at some indefinate point in the future farewell!

Numbness
Mood:  hug me
It's stranege, this feeling a kind of emotional numbness, like being totally invisible to everybody even when you're standing right in front of them. They dont really care, not many of them at least, not necessarily about me as a person I know people that do care about that but about the things I do, my life that is not revolved around my physical being!

I have very little confidence in my abilities at anything and so when I have done something, a piece of writing or a picture for instance, I will show very few people because im afraid of ridicule. I would love to show so many people and not be embarassed about the low quality of the things I produce because they make me happy when I do them so it shouldnt matter really what other people think. But I know too many people who can produce such outstanding work that I feel so inadequate around them and what I do is left ignored in the corner. For so long I havent wanted to do anything like this because no one is interested in what I have to produce, why should I bother? no one cares so is there really any point in my trying? Just save me the embarassment and i'll quit before I start.

Mood:  lazy
Such boredness!
I've been so exhausted recently for some unknown reason, I've been getting enough sleep, and it's not even like I do anything tiring, okay some of my lessons can be mentally draining but nothing that would wear me out to this extent! I'm sure it will pass, either that or I'll get ill and have to take a week off with the flu or something *rolls eyes* that would just be typical.

Anyway as usual nothing particularly exciting happened today, not that I'd expect much from a regular day at college. Nice easy lesson to end the day though which was good, simply advertising for the Macmillan nurses charity event we're holding on Friday.

No Japanese lesson tomorrow because its a specail language day at college so instead our class is going to learn some very small and basic amounts of Sweedish which could be interesting. Widening my knowledge of languages, I know random and useless words and phrases in French, Spanish, German, Italian, Russian, Japnaese, Welsh and will soon be adding Sweedish to that list (note that I couldnt even attempt to form a coherant sentence in any of these apart from French, Spanish and Japanese).

I will now do a random disapeering act because I'm hungry and should start cooking dinner.
Sayonara!

Mood:  chillin'
Okay so this is my first entry in my new bolg and I can promise you that it wont be particularly interesting to anyone who may read this. However it's my blog and so I will fill it with as much crap as I like!

College today was no particular change from the usual, tutor period, a complete waste of time and to think I got up at 8 this morning just for that. But to then not actually have a lesson until 12:10 simply takes the piss. The lesson was psychology, quite an interesting subject however pretty much everyone else in the class is a first year which makes me feel old. (okay it's only 2 years difference but the gap between 16 and 18 seems considerably large) So there are times during the lesson when I feel that some people really need to grow up , but that might just be me feeling superior because im older and know the college about as well as I can.

Then we reach another point in the day where my timetable takes the piss, from 1:10 till 3:20 I have absolutly nothing! Yet this isnt quite enough time to go home in but it is still far too long to hang around college wasting my time, boredom tends to overcome me after the first hour. They have done this to me every year I have been there and its really beginning to annoy me and they wonder why I sometimes dont come back for the last hour when i've had about three in which to do nothing!

Anyway the end of my ranting about my crappy day at college, im sure you've all died of boredom by now!
Farewell!