Hello everyone. You might think you know me but you really don't. I don't even know me really. I guess I could put all the retard stuff about me that you already know (i.e. I'm 15, have red hair, blue eyes, am horrible ugly, etc., etc.) but if you already know it why the hell should I tell you it?
I'm basically starting this website because I'm pissed off at life and I really want to write a novel. Why make a web page then you ask? Because writing a novel takes a really long time. And a hell of a lot of thought. This I can just ramble forever and there's nothing you can really do about it.
Read the following list if you really feel like finding out what pisses me off. After that there are links to other pages where i just ramble incesantly. Always good fun.
Also...please sign my guest book. I really want to know that someone came to this website besides me.
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A quote for all: "Nothing worth doing is completed in one lifetime, therefore we must be saved by hope. Nothing true or beautiful makes complete sense in any context of history, therefore we must be saved by faith. Nothing we do, no matter how virtuous, can be accomplished alone. Therefore we must be saved by love." -- Reinold Niebuhr
Things That Really Piss Me Off
- Highschool. Really I just hate the people. I'm talking about the ones that aren't my friends. The ones I like to sit back and judge. Why all the fucking make up? Nobody's really gonna wanna make out with a French whore in America. Maybe if you traveled to France you'd have a better chance at getting laid. I also hate all the people who are trying to make a statement with their clothes. The only statement I hear is put something on that won't make me feel like hurling everytime I look at it.
- Highschool Dances. They aren't actual dances. The only person actually dancing is my friend who will be referred to as Lumpy. Everyone else is either having sex or just standing there. Personally I prefer the former.
- English Class. More specifically...the stoopid meanlessly pointless essays. The essays are almost as pointless as my life. Who's my hero Mrs. Gipson? He's a dead psycopath...I bet you didn't want to hear that did you? No. I didn't think so.
- The pointlessness of my existence. Seriously, what purpose do I serve? Sure I might give you entertainment sometimes but you'd survive just fine without me. I'm not like oxygen where people would die without me being there. But you know...when I think about it...I don't really want that much responsibility to be tagged onto my existence. I would just like to find a purpose. Or even if I don't find a purpose I'd really enjoy finding a way to be happier.
- Reflective surfaces. I can be having the perfect day and then I catch a glimpse of myself in the window and I really want to hurl myself down a flight of stairs because I hate what I see.
- Marching band. 'Nuff said.
- Stoopid people. They shouldn't be allowed to reproduce. We should seriously do an IQ test on prepubescent kids and take away reproductive abilities on those that don't make the grade. It makes sense. Get them way before highschool so you know that the ones stoopid enough to get pregnant in or before highschool won't be able to have children. It helps prevent overpopulation because most smart people won't have millions of children that they can't afford. It'll improve our over all intelligence level because if stoopid people aren't reproducing there won't be future versions of them. It would also prolly cut down on poverty because most of the people living in poverty stricken dumps are too stoopid to improve they're situation. I'm not saying all of them...i'm just saying that a lot of them are. A lot of them don't have any money at all and yet they keep popping out stoopid children.
- Make-up. What's the point of it? To make other people believe you're something you're not? Most of the time the girls who cake it on look like shit anyways. I personally only wear mascara but that's because I'd look dead otherwise. And maybe I'm being hipocritical there but still...I don't use half the Wal-Mart stock of make-up on my face every morning.
- My parents. Most of the time. They just will not leave me alone. Every five seconds they want me to talk to them. Maybe if they'd leave me alone once in a while I'd actually want to spend time with them. Do they ever think of that? Of course not.
- Decorating for Christmas. With my parents. And having to pick out a tree. I really just want to sit alone in my room and wallow in my angst. Why won't you let me wallow?
- Emotions. Maybe they just piss me off because I have way to many of them. All I know is they really piss me off all the time. I just want to be the kool laid-back chick who's un-emotional.
- Thinking. This prolly pisses me off because I do way to much of it. I tend to think myself into depression or think up things that aren't really true.
- Being a woman. There is no guy that could ever prove to me that being a woman is better than being a guy. Guys are the same all the time. If they're pissy, they're pissy all the time. Girls on the other hand are different every single day. Personally my mood changes about twenty times a second.
- Reading. It takes along time. But I do like forcing you to read. It really amuzes me.
- Free time. It's what gets me depressed. I have time to sit around and think up things that aren't even there. It's especially bad when I have pms. But hey, on the bright side, blaming everything on pms makes life a hell of a lot easier. But see...right now...I'm sitting in BCIS with nothing to do and I'm just rambling because I know that if I stop I'll end up getting depressed and whining to someone. This way I just whine to random people who are bored enough to read through this entire list.
- Paranoia. I have a hella bad case of paranoia. I constantly think that everyone is just sitting around making fun of me. Of course I realize that no one really cares about me and prolly never even thinks about me unless I'm directly involved with what they're doing at that very moment but I still can't kill that stoopid voice in the back of my head that's constantly telling me that everyone hates me. It's really quite unhealthy.
- The multiple voices in my head. Let's go thru the list. First of all there's the kool (I like to think) laid back one who I'd like to be all the time. This is usually the person I am in the morning when nothing's managed to piss me off yet or in the afternoon when I've just stopped giving a shit. Then there's the voice that I hate. The paranoid one. Refer to the above hate to learn about this one. Then there's the one that's writing this right now. The one that just kinda witnesses and judges everything that's going on inside my head. Gotta love the judging!!!
- Guys. More specifically the ones who are just friends and will never think of me otherwise. See...I have yet to find that secret key that makes guys think of me as more than just a friend. Hell, I'd be happy if I was thought of as a friend with benifits. I just can't stand being just your friend anymore. (Please don't ask me if this is you. This is really only one guy and I really don't want him to find out I feel this way about him. Yeah...more than likely it's not you. So just don't ask.)
- Crushes. The hurt like a hella big bitch. And they can ruin friendships like nobody's business.
- Clothes. None of mine fit anymore and they're all really uncomfortable and look shitty. And then I went shopping today and NOTHING fit right or looked even semi-decent. Why can't I find perfect clothes that fit me? I personally think we should all just walk around naked. It would make everything a lot easier because nobody would be judged on what kind of clothes they wear...just on how good their naked body looks. And I think we all know I excell in that area of beauty, that being the naked area. Mmmmm....nakedness...one thing I defenitely do NOT hate!!!
- Dreams. Well, I guess they'd be considered nightmares if I don't like them. They just really confuse me. I don't know if that's my subconcious trying to tell me that I want what's in my dream. I know that usually I hate what turns up in my dreams and wish I could never think about it again. But of course, since I'm a woman, it's all I end up thinking about.
- People who quote Dave Chappelle. Sure the guy is funny but you aren't. And quoting someone that is funny makes you even less funny that you already are. You wanna laugh? Go look in the freaking mirror. I can't even watch the damn show anymore because everyone thinks they're him. I don't even need to watch it because I know when I get to school the two good moments of the show will be reinacted for me. And the sad thing is most of the people I'm talking about are white. Just because you quote him doesn't make you funny OR black...get over it.
My other pages that go with this site.
Letter to Everyone - Please Read
Kurt Cobain Pics
Kurt with Francis Pics
The Perfect Man
Fortunes, Fortunes Everyone!!!