Each breath I take is driving me closer to the edge, every sensation burning and building within me until all I can do is sigh Faith’s name over and over. She’s kissing every inch of my face, telling me I’m beautiful and amazing, and that all she can think about is me. Whispering that all she wants is me. It’s making my heart pound harder in my chest, and it’s already beating pretty quickly from the way Faith’s moving against me.

“I love the way you feel against me like this, Faith,” I manage to breathe out, my lungs sucking in the air around me as we move faster and harder.

I wince a little as I feel a twinge of pain in my side from the deep injury I’d gotten earlier. It’s healing quick, but still sore.

“I’m sorry, B,” Faith says softly, kissing my nose and pulling her weight off me just a little.

I don’t want her to move. I want her weight on me, all of her on me. When we have sex this way it makes me feel incredibly close to her, our bodies completely in synch, fitting together perfectly as she slips her pussy over mine until we both come together.

“Don’t move away, Faith,” I say, my eyes holding hers, asking her to stay with me.

“I’m not going anywhere, B,” Faith assures, moving her body with mine again, making love to me exactly the way I need right now.

We kiss soft and slow, but full of passion and the deep want we have for each other. After a day like today this is what I need, and I didn’t have to ask for it. . .Faith just seemed to know. She took me in her strong arms and lifted me to the bed, kissing me slowly everywhere, letting my tears fall and not once making me feel bad for showing emotion. She kissed away the tears and she’s easing away the hurt with her touches and her body trapped between my legs as we cling to each other.

The last few days have been crazy hectic and today was. . .something I can’t find the words to describe yet. It’s all kind of a blur, yet completely clear in my mind.

Once Faith and I had been caught having the not so secret sex I almost lost my nerve and was on the verge of freaking out. I mean, I’d just come out as a big raging Faith lover. It was way more awkward than I’d imagined it could be. It kinda made me feel sorry for Willow and what she must have felt those few years before when she came tumbling out of the closet.

As soon as I’d gotten Faith upstairs I’d began to pace, my mind spinning and my thought processes shooting off in all different directions. I didn’t know what to think or what to do. We’d heard everybody but Andrew leave again for the mall, but that didn’t make me relax. I knew they’d come back and I’d have to face them.

* * *

Moments after the big revelation. . .

“Chill, B. . .we can just say we were goofing around,” Faith tells me, watching me pace the floor from the bed. “It doesn’t bother me if you keep it just between us. . .as long as yunno, you’re not about to change your mind about this.”

Faith’s words and the slight vulnerability in her tone make me stop and look directly at her. I don’t want to stop this thing with her, and I definitely don’t want Faith thinking I’m in any way ashamed of being with her, which is probably how it seems. It’s just. . .difficult. This isn’t an easy situation for me to find myself in.

Sitting on the bed beside Faith I take one of her hands in mine. “I’m not about to change my mind,” I tell her sincerely. “You’re. . .well, I guess you’re what I want right now. Probably what I need,” I say quietly, looking down at my feet.

She squeezes my hand and nudges me with her shoulder, making me look up so I can see the cute grin she’s giving me.

“Was one hell of a way to break it to ‘em anyways,” she says with a chuckle. “Hell, I think some of ‘em might need therapy after that.”

I laugh with her, feeling the weight lift from me just that little bit; just enough to breathe and try my best not to bury myself under my responsibilities and other people’s expectations.

We stop laughing once we start kissing, my desire flaring up again instantly with not only the taste of Faith’s mouth on mine, but the remnants of her pussy smeared across my lips. I really can’t believe we had sex in the kitchen, and that I did what I did to her without even stopping to think about her poor ribs. Once the floodgates had opened I couldn’t stop the rush, so to speak. I just want her so much.

* * *

We’d had sex again - a little less one sided than previously - until Andrew had interrupted, telling us that Giles needed Faith to train with the scythe with me. He told us that it was all mystical and magical, and not just some random axe I’d stumbled on. I guessed it must have been important for Giles to send the message through Andrew, so we got up and did a few hours sparring with it, taking turns to get used to the weight and the flow of its arc.

When Giles and the girls had eventually made their way back home, Giles told us his theory about where it came from and its purpose. It didn’t just feel like mine, it seemed like it really was my scythe. Well, mine and Faith’s. I was more than happy to share, and was left feeling much more hopeful having heard all the information Giles knew about it.

It was our key to winning the fight, I just wasn’t sure how right away.

That night I went with Faith to a place I’d never recalled seeing before, even though I’d patrolled through the cemetery hundreds of times in the past. We were meant to find who, or what had made the scythe. An old woman came out of the shadows in an old tomb and told us about it. She told us that it had been forged a long time ago, and that it was powerful. She didn’t get to say too much more as a guy in a preacher outfit kind of abruptly ended her sentence for her by snapping her neck. It was a little shocking, and I could feel the power oozing from the guy who told us his name was Caleb.

I didn’t like his tone, let alone the way he’d just killed the old woman that was some kind of link to the past and to the ancient slayer line. It pissed me off, and when he told me how he’d met and killed a slayer on the way to Sunnydale I launched myself at him, scythe first.

“The slayer was weak,” he said. “Nothing more than an itty bitty fly to squash for the greater good, and you’re next.”

He’d killed Kendra and her watcher, gloating about it as he knocked me back way too easily. When I’d gotten to my feet I saw Faith being pushed aside like she was nothing but the potential she’d been when she first arrived. The guy was strong. . .but I knew we were stronger. Especially together.

Throwing everything we had at him, kicking, punching, and tossing the scythe back and forth between us we wore him down. He never stopped talking the entire time, telling us about what was coming.

It took a lot of effort and both Faith and I ended up a little battered and bloody, but I tested the power of the scythe on Caleb by slicing him in half. It wasn’t a pretty sight, and the sound he made rang in my ears for hours afterwards. But he was gone so we didn’t have to listen to him rambling on anymore, leaving the First to do its own bidding.

We went back home triumphant, almost giddy in fact. . .until I spotted Angel lurking outside the house.

* * *

The evening before the big battle. . .

“It’s ok, Faith,” I assure her, holding my hand out to stop her as she pulls a stake from her jacket, obviously feeling the vampy vibe. “I know him. It’s Angel.”

Faith glances over at me and I can almost sense the slight worry within her. I’d told her all about Angel the day we had our first real ‘talk’, just after Faith had been called. She knows he was a big part of my life, but I also hope she knows that he’s nothing more than just a memory and a friend now.

“Hey,” I say, nodding Angel’s way. “Can you give us a minute?”

He looks confused, almost burying his eyes under his brow as he gives me the pained puppy-dog look. At least he doesn’t follow when I pull Faith closer to the house to talk to her.

“I’m gonna ask why he’s here before he comes in. . .if he’s coming in. It’s probably best you go inside and let everyone know we killed the guy that got to Kendra,” I tell Faith.

She furrows her brow, glancing from Angel to me, something obviously just on the tip of her tongue that she’s not sharing. I see the worry that I’d felt before, but it doesn’t annoy me. I think I’d feel the same if one of her deep and meaningful exes showed up. Not that she has any that I know of. Apparently she’s always been more of a use ‘em and lose ‘em kinda girl. . .until me. The “until me” part is my favourite.

“You don’t have to worry, Faith,” I say quietly so only she can hear. “I’m a one man kinda woman. . .I mean, one woman kinda. . .you get the idea, right?”

“Yeah. . .you’re not gonna go rubbin’ up against him when you’ve got me to do that with,” she says with a grin, but there’s still a lingering sense of concern.

I want to kiss her to reassure her, but it feels a little weird with Angel brooding by the tree.

“I won’t be long, and I swear – slayer's honour -,” I say, holding my hand over my heart with a mischievous smile, “that I’ll be back before you know it so we can work off some of the energy of the slayage.” I give her a little wink.

“I’ll hold you to that,” she chuckles, about to turn away, but stopping to look me right in the eye before continuing. “And just so you know. . .I’m not worried, B. Choosing between the goon over there and me,” she says, running her hands down her body, “shouldn’t be that hard when you know what I can do for ya.”

My tongue sneaks out over my lips as I watch her hands, wanting to replace them with mine. There’s no competition. Hell, if she’d come along in the height of my whole ‘Angel thing’ I still think I would have crushed on her like crazy and had quite a few naughty fantasies about us. She just seems to inspire that in me.

We share a knowing smile before she disappears into the house.

Before I have much of a chance to turn and wave Angel over he’s right beside me, his face all sad and expectant. I once found that look completely and undeniably cute, but now it just makes me want to poke him in the ribs. I don’t of course, choosing to smile fondly at him instead.

“Hi,” he says. “Nice scythe.”

He points to my shiny red scythe and I nod. Obviously he’s feeling a little uncomfortable, and I know that I am. It shouldn’t be this way, but after all we’ve been through. . .it’s kind of unavoidable.

“It’s good at chopping bad guys up,” I say, pointing out the obvious.

“I’m unarmed and in full possession of a soul, I promise,” he tells me with a big cheesy grin, holding his hands up.

I laugh at him and shake my head. “So you’re not here to force me to kill you. . .which leaves me with the question, why are you here? Not that it’s not nice to see an old flame now and then but yunno, we’re kinda busy and apocalypse-y here,” I say, still smiling so he knows I have no bad feelings about him.

“Old flame? Ouch,” he hisses, clutching his chest. “I thought I at least ranked somewhere around the ‘love of your life’ mark.”

His smile is still on his lips, but I can sense his disappointment. He forgets how well I learned to read him when we were together.

“Maybe you’re a little higher than old flame, but don’t push it,” I tease.

Angel nods and we fall quiet again, the silence growing a little awkward.

“So. . .” we both say at once.

There’s another pause and I almost feel like using the scythe to slice my arm off to give me an excuse to leave in a hurry, but that might be a little extreme, even if I am kinda missing Faith. Which is obviously pretty extreme too, as we’ve only been apart for two minutes.

We both begin to speak at the same time again, but this time I wave him on to continue. He looks from the house back to me, his soft eyes settling on mine as I wait.

“You’re. . .with her?” he asks quietly, shocking me with his presumption.

At first I don’t know what to say. I mean, what can I say? Yeah, we’ve fucked a few times and I can’t stop thinking about her? She’s making my insides turn to squishy stuff and giving me amazing orgasms? I’ve never been with anybody that I’m so into and completely bowled over by before, and it’s making me fall headlong in love with her? Sure. . .those are all true, but not exactly the kind of thing you’d say to an ex who sometimes likes to lose his soul and eat your friends.

I choose the honesty option, it’s the least I can do. “Yeah,” I reply, a small smile lifting my lips before I can stop it.

Angel nods and shuffles his feet a little.

“And you’re happy?” he asks.

I nod. Angel nods. It’s a nodding convention.

“Serious?” he pushes.

“Serious as in am I seriously happy? Or serious as in. . .do I think I can and want to trust her with my heart?”

“Either, both. . .neither hopefully,” he responds with a slight smirk.

I let the question sink in, and despite the fact the world is on a knife edge I answer yes, to both. “It’s both,” I make clear. “She. . .makes it both,” I continue, a little less clear but needing to hear myself say the words aloud again.

There’s more nodding from Angel and I realise I’m not as good at reading him as I thought. I have no clue what he’s thinking.

As I’m distracted by what he might go on to ask, Angel pulls something out of his pocket and hands it to me. It’s a shiny pendant or something probably more magical and meaningful.

I’m right in my assumption as he goes on to tell me what it is and how it could play a part in our apocalypse. The conversation leaves no room for more chatting about my new lesbian tendencies and I’m grateful. I don’t want to feel sorry for being with Faith now, not when it feels as good as it does.

When he leaves we hug and I tell him he still has a place in my heart, just not the same place he once had. I think he gets it, and I think he’s ok with me being with Faith. He would have been able to tell she’s a slayer, so at least he knows she’ll have my back when I need it. And my front, and my. . .

I’m broken from my thoughts as the door creaks open and I see Willow poking her head out. I guess it’s time to go in and face the music about Faith, and tell them all that Spike’s our champion. Even if that last part makes me want to hurl the amulet thingy into the nearest stinky bog full of crocodiles.

* * *

Having distracted them all with more details about the scythe woman, Caleb, and the news about Spike, I managed to play down my newfound gayness and fondness of sex in – almost - public places. There were surprised looks and open mouths, but nobody fainted or died of heart failure so all in all it wasn’t a completely mortifying hour of my life. Just slightly so. . .especially when Xander fell off his chair when he realised he’d missed the show and Willow filled him in on the details.

They all took it surprisingly well, though there were a few questions like “Why Faith?” I asked them if they’d ever actually seen Faith, with their actual eyes, and they understood. It’s obvious why it’s Faith, and not just because of her attractiveness. I know they’ll find out how great she is in more than just the looks department. It’ll just take a little more time for them.

At that point we didn’t know how much more time we had, but my hope was growing. I knew we had to have a chance, even if I wasn’t exactly sure how, or where to strike with that chance. I’d seen the army we needed to fight in a vision. We were few against many, but we had good on our side, a scythe full of slayer essence stuff, and apparently Spike.

That night we came up with a plan and prepared ourselves to take the fight to the First, hoping it wasn’t anticipating us strolling into the hellmouth filled with thousands of Turok-Han on a whim. We had more than a whim of course, we had Willow, and a crazy idea. I just hoped we could hold it together.

* * *

The night before the big battle. . .

Laying my head down on my pillow, feeling exhausted from the long day, I watch as Faith gets undressed for bed. We’re both a little anxious about the huge fight we have tomorrow, but both of us are trying to hide it. I don’t want her to get the impression I’m scared, as much as I am. I imagine Faith’s thinking the same way.

“Hurry up and get that sexy backside in here,” I tell Faith, holding the covers up for her to crawl under.

“Sexy huh?” she says, wiggling it at me as she slides her panties off.

“Without a doubt,” I grin, feeling pleased with myself for deciding we should forgo the whole need to fumble each other’s panties off when we get more ‘cosy’, by taking them off before getting into bed.

“You’ve got great taste, yunno that?” Faith tells me with a smirk, her dimples making her all the more grabbable than normal.

My hands shoot out of the covers and I grasp Faith around the waist, pulling her down to me as she squeals. It was a pretty girly squeal, and all kinds of cute, so I wrap her up in my arms and legs and flip us over so I’m on top, straddling Faith as she gazes up at me smiling. I can’t help but fall into her eyes. More than that. . .fall completely for her. I feel my heart fluttering like crazy and all I want to do is tell Faith how I feel. There’s nothing in her eyes that’s making me think it would be the wrong thing to say, but I’m still biting my tongue and holding the words in, despite the fact I’d already almost said them earlier.

I don’t want her to freak, especially not now when I need her the most.

“Anybody ever tell you you’ve got beautiful eyes, B?” Faith asks me as she looks deep into them.

I have to stop and think about the question. If anybody has ever said that, then I’ve completely forgotten about it, or at least. . .it in no way made me feel as good as Faith telling me.

“I don’t think so,” I admit bashfully.

“Well you have,” she assures, her thumb brushing over my left eyebrow.

“Not as beautiful as yours,” I point out.

We seem to be trapped, just looking at each other as I hold myself over Faith, connected to her where we both want it most. There doesn’t appear to be any words that would fit the moment. I’m guessing Faith agrees as I feel her hand slowly - achingly slowly - travel down my body between us. She swirls her fingertips around and over my nipples but doesn’t linger as I sigh. Her hand moves down and I get wet with anticipation, unable to help myself as Faith’s dark eyes hold me still.

A gasp slips past my lips when Faith’s fingers slide between my folds and over my clit. I want to close my eyes and concentrate on her fingers slipping over me, but I can’t break free from hers. She’s looking at me so openly, filling me with what she feels. It’s almost too much, too frightening considering I could lose it all tomorrow. . .possibly even lose her.

“Buffy,” Faith says softly, grabbing my attention with the raw emotion in her voice. “Tell me what you were gonna say this morning in the kitchen, before we got barged in on.”

My breath quivers as her fingers circle my clit, and I fight to keep the words from coming out again. I don’t want to tell her then have her be taken away from me, or watch her walk out of the door. I need her more than I care to admit. In the short time I’ve known Faith she’s brought something different to my life. . .and not just in the obvious way. She’s shown me what it really feels like to fall, to rush headfirst into something that you can’t break free from no matter how hard you try. I’ve never known this before, not truly, not so deep and definitely never so quick. What would I do if I lost it so soon?

“I’m not going anywhere, B,” Faith says quietly, reading my mind, her breath coming out almost as quick and hard as mine.

I feel a tear drip from my cheek and it splashes onto Faith’s, rolling down it to her neck. She lifts her free hand and places it on my face, her thumb brushing away any more stray tears. I guess the prospect of tomorrow, and feeling totally and completely swept up by the gorgeous girl beneath me is getting me a little emotional. It’s not like me, but it’s real.

Faith’s fingers work faster over my clit making me tremble for her, but she’s still not pressing hard, just keeping me where she wants me. I can already feel myself right on the edge anyway, close to giving everything I have to Faith. Everything.

“Oh, God,” I sigh as she presses her fingers against my clit a little firmer now.

“Tell me, B,” Faith whispers.

I moan as Faith slips and slides over my clit, pushing me gently over the edge as my world blurs at the corners and all I can feel is Faith and how much I already want her in my heart.

“I’m in love with you, Faith,” I say breathlessly, my eyes still locked with hers as I come over her fingers, pushing down into her as I shake and gasp. “I’m so in love with you,” I repeat, unable to hold back now it’s free.

She crashes her mouth up to mine, kissing me deeply as I come down. Her arms wrap around me, pulling me impossibly close, and it feels like the only place I ever want to be.

When I stop shaking and break away from Faith’s lips for air, I rest my head down on her shoulder to catch my breath. She strokes her fingers over my back, her touch soft and reassuring, her heartbeat fluttering against me as she smiles like the cat that got the cream. Nuzzling my nose into her neck, I smile almost as broadly as she hugs me tighter. I’m not waiting for her to tell me she feels the same back, I’m pretty sure I can feel it anyway, but I keep still and silent just in case.

“I’ve never said the words before,” she says, almost too quiet to hear. “Fuck, I’ve never had to. Never wanted to have to.”

We both hold our breaths for a second, hearts thumping together. I don’t want her to feel like she has to say anything. I know I’m being pretty quick off the mark with the love thing. I mean, we haven’t known each other that long. It’s not like. . .

“I’ve got like zero experience with this. . .but I went and fell in love with you too, Buffy,” Faith finally says, stemming my pointless flow of thoughts. “Pretty fucking hard in fact.”

I know I’m beaming, probably enough to light a small town, her words filtering into my heart like. . .well, like nothing I can even begin to describe right now. I feel full. High. Soaring. Everything you’d expect when you get what you truly want. When you have a girl as beautiful and special as Faith tell you she’s in love with you.

Lifting my head, I look down into her eyes. She doesn’t avoid looking back, her feelings on display to me as much as mine probably are to her. It’s no wonder I’ve fallen in love with her. Who could blame me?

I lean down and kiss her softly, my lips teasing over hers as I smile against her mouth, feeling her smiling right back. Everything slotting into place just before everything gets put on the line.

* * *

That was the first night we made love. Don’t get me wrong, it was still damn hot, and wet, and fucking sexy as hell, but there was more there. It went deeper and we could both feel it. The world was going to be hanging by our fingertips and every moan and gasp between us brought us closer, made us stronger. Ready for the fight ahead.

When morning came we all flew into action, every one of us knowing our place, our position on the front line. Willow was nervous, as were we all. I tried my best to hold it together, keeping my cool as we made our way through the deserted streets of Sunnydale. The sun was hot, making us sticky and thirsty even before the fight began. Our goal solid. Our reasons built on good against evil, on right against wrong. This was our war, and we weren’t going to back down from it.

Entering the hellmouth was probably the most terrifying thing any of us had done before, but nobody dropped out. Faith stood by my side, making me feel bigger, stronger, faster. I wasn’t about to lose and have our time together cut short. I wasn’t going to let anybody’s time be cut short if I could help it.

Of course, we did lose people, and Spike made the ultimate sacrifice, redeeming himself as he willfully gave up his existence to save those of us left. To save the world. As the earth shook around us I stayed with him as long as I could, Faith waiting close by, not pushing me or pressuring me to just leave him. He was once a good man, before the demon killed his humanity. . .and I knew he was a good man again as he met his fate with a grin. Our history was patchy and I won’t fool myself into thinking I was above blame in all we did, in all the ways we hurt each other. He was flawed, but so am I. He was mean and jealous, but I’d helped make him that way.

The hellmouth fell into the earth as we sped away counting the survivors, checking the injuries. It had been close. Almost too close, but as each potential had felt the power of the slayer go through her. . .the tide had turned. We came out on top. We beat the bad guy, just like we’re supposed to.

Not all of Sunnydale crumbled away. The crater ends just a mile from the house we all set out from this morning. From here, where I lay wrapped in Faith, feeling every movement of her body against me as we hold tight to one another. As we try to warm each other, fighting out the cold hurt of losing people that had become such a big part of our lives. Of my life.

“Faith,” I moan, pushing up into her as her pussy slides over mine. “Don’t ever stop holding me like this.”

My emotions are laid bare and exposed, out of my control as I let myself go and just feel. Skin against skin. Foreheads touching as we lock together.

“I won’t,” Faith replies, her breath hot against my lips. “In too far.”

I kiss her deeply, knowing exactly what she means. Sure that she won’t leave me.

During the battle I’d fallen as I got hurt pretty badly, and she came right to my side, beating back the vampires with no fear for her own safety, trying to get to me. I’d never seen such anger, such power and feeling. It flowed through me from her. Faith flowed through me and gave me the strength to get back up. I was sure right then that she was the one. She’s the one I want to keep with me for the rest of my life.

“I love you,” I tell Faith breathlessly as my body shivers beneath her.

We thrust and grind and ride each other to climax, our fingers grasping and bodies trembling as we come hard, covering each other in wet and warm stickiness. She’s beautiful when she comes, especially like this, holding herself flush against me with my legs wrapped around her. Our gasps and moans fill the air, calling each other’s names until there’s nothing more to give. Until the next time.

“I love you too, Buffy,” Faith sighs. “Never knew what it meant until the day I met you.”

I smile and kiss her face all over as we catch our breaths. We have a lot ahead of us. A lot of mending, and a lot of picking up the pieces for those around us, patching up what’s left of our lives as we try to remember what’s normal again. . .but we’ll do it together. Despite the fact this is new for both of us; I feel her heart against mine and know it’s sincere and true. And it’s mine. I fought it out of fear to begin with, but I won’t fight anymore.

Sliding my legs down from around Faith’s hips, I take a deep breath of her scent and feel my eyes drifting closed. She’s drifting with me, settling on top of me, nowhere near too heavy for me to want to move her off. She can stay there between my thighs all night. It’s exactly where I want her.

As I arrange my feet near Faith’s I chuckle softly, feeling the fuzzy warmth of her favourite pair of holey socks.

“Do you still have your socks on, Faith?” I ask, knowing fully well she does. Finding it adorable given the fact she always acts so tough and cool.

“Hey, I get cold feet, ok? S’not a crime,” she responds sleepily. “Didn’t hear ya complaining either when I was making you come all over my pussy.”

I feel her gorgeous grin on my neck where her face is pressed against me, and kiss the top of her head.

She’ll always be adorable to me, no matter how much she tries not to be. No matter how tough, crude, bad, cool or downright annoying she can be. She’s mine. My Faith.

My slayer.