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Are you a mindless idiot in search of a cult? Pack up and move to Utah.

Utah is by far the worst planet in our solar system. That's right, it's a different planet. I know because i lived there for 8 miserable years. It's full of lunatics who bike around trying to spread their cult. Yes, mormonism is a cult. They demand 25% of your money. They wear white robes once a month to go dunking for the dead. They force you to go on a mission. And after all this, you're promised to be God of your own planet in the Kolob Universe. And this is all because some social outcast from New York claimed he was visited by an angel named Moroni (real name) and he was given some golden plates. What a complete crock of shit. I had to grow up surrounded by these morons who tried to push their religion on me when in actuality, I knew more about their bullshit false prophet church than any one of them did. Fuck Mormons and fuck that black hole in the universe called Utah.