Dogs Can Teach Valuable Lessons

This funny article was written up by Your Dog Man Eamon Riley.
Eamon is a professional dog trainer and animal behavioral consultant.
He can be reached at dogmanusmc@aol.com if you have any questions.

"In all my years as a dog trainer, I have collected various lists about dog owners.
Sometimes I give these out during my training classes, and I hope that you find them as humorous as my students have.
Enjoy."
Your Dog Man Eamon Riley

DOG PROPERTY LAWS

• If I like it, it's mine.
• If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
• If I can take it from you, it's mine.
• If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
• If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
• If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
• If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
• If I saw it first, it's mine.
• If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
• If it's broken, it's yours.

TEN REASONS WHY A DOG IS BETTER THAN A MAN:

• A dog does not have problems expressing affection in public.
• A dog misses you when you're gone.
• A dog feels guilty when it has done something wrong.
• A dog admits when it's jealous.
• A dog is very direct about wanting to go out.
• A dog does not play games with you - except fetch (and it never laughs at how you throw).
• You can train a dog.
• A dog is easy to buy for.
• A dog understands what "no" means
• A dog means it when it kisses you.

TEN REASONS WHY A DOG IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN:

• A dog's parents will never visit you.
• A dog loves you when you leave your clothes on the floor.
• A dog limits its time in the bathroom to a quick drink.
• A dog never expects you to telephone.
• A dog will not get mad at you if you forget its birthday.
• A dog does not care about previous dogs in your life.
• A dog does not get mad at you if you pet another dog.
• A dog never expects flowers on Valentine's Day.
• The later you are, the happier a dog is to see you.
• A dog does no shop.