I married a man,
or so he was called.
That was very abusive.
And I lived in fear and
abuse for 4 years.
He was a master at physical,
mental and sexual abuse.

Don't ask me why I stayed,
I thought I loved him,
and maybe I was doing something
to make him mad.
After all he was older
and I was just a child.

He spent any free time in a bar.
And when he got home
I would have hell to
pay for anything
that went wrong for him
that day.
Then one day he came home
and beat me with a 2x4
so bad I almost died.
But I managed before
I passed out to get me and
my kids out and away.

As you read here in my own words,
I am a Survior
I made it,
I raised my children,
educated myself
and I am stronger for it.
I will not tell you
it was easy.
It was hard,and
I gave up alot,
but I am Alive.

If these words help one person,
be it male or female
get out,it was worth
all the memories it stirred
up doing this page.
STORMY

I can see you today as clear
as if it was not 17 years ago.
Standing over me in the hospital,
after one of your many beatings..
"I never meant to hurt you,"
that is what you said,
"If only you hadn't made me mad,"
"If you would of
done as I told you,"
"I love you and need you"
That is what you say.
"I want you back ,"
"I will change"
That is what you say,
and yet not
a month later ,
here I am again.
Hearing those
same words again.
STORMY

I need some time
to be alone
I need some time
to be free to think
I need to stand back
and take a good look
I can't talk to anyone about it
They wouldn't understand
Everyone thinks the world of you

I'm slowly going crazy
You're making a
nervous wreak out of me
I can't do anything right
no matter how hard
I try.
You always find fault
I'm not allowed to have friends..
no they
might find out the truth
And then you would get mad
and I would feel the pain
and hear those words
And I am slowly dying here
The only light in my life
are the children
So I sit and look out the window
and wish I was as free
as the birds.
STORMY

Today we ended a chapter
in our lives
Today I told the judge,
I couldn't stay your wife.
Today I told them
I couldn't live that life
Today,you were feeling
alot of the things
I have felt over the years
Today I saw you cry
those famous tears
The ones I have seen
so many times over the years
Today you told me
you loved me and missed me
Today I closed my heart off to you
All I could feel for you is pity
Because I no longer
feel anything for you
And as I walk out
of the court room
I believe I am free at last
Free to be me!
STORMY

I have over 400 pages of what I felt
and went though over those years and the
ones that followed
There is the one of the beating that ended in
my losing the child I was carrying
And waking up to find out I could no longer
have children
And how you blamed me
Then of the time you came home and beat me
because there was a dirty dish in the sink
How you called me stupid,and worthless
How watching my childrens faces,every time you
raised your voice or hand
The douths of what I did was right
when we had no food,or when the rent was due
I had no money..
The long hours I put in on my job
to come home and work till wee hours of the night
Then to that I added going to school to get a degree
The nights I cried myself to sleep,wondering
if I was wrong
and living with you was not so bad
At least the kids had a home
Then I look into thier sleeping faces and
I see peace for the first time in thier
young lives and I know
That we will make it,I had to do it for the kids

It has been 17 years now since I walked away
And I will admit,I had my douths,and the times
were hard And I am strong and know that I did not
do anything wrong,nor did I deserve what he
did to me
And even thou they were babies he did it to them
each time he rose his hand to me
So if you find your self in trouble
there are places to go.and people that
will help.
You don't have to stay
Your worth more than that
STORMY

These are my reasons for leaving My Children


And I was told I had to add my picture too..So here I am