Waverley's Finest

The Ten most Memorable Teachers at Waverley

From remincences by TTT members who attended the school 1988-1995

1. Emilio Julius Cesaro - "CONTINUE!!"

EJC is the most famous and quoted teacher in the history of school education in NSW, and possibly the world. His Year 9 religion classes are fondly remembered by TTT members Candy Boy, The Warrior and The Prince, but most of the TTT have memories of the man. We also have our favourite "Cesaro Moments", which we discuss ad nauseum at every meeting (much to the annoyance of non-Waverlian Wacko). The Cesaro calls become more common and strangely funnier as the night progresses and the beers flow...

Cesaro is remembered for many reasons, most of all his incredible, unbelievable and hilariously funny "skitzs". Below we describe some of the most famous...

We'll set the scene...it's Year 8, 1991, Mr Frangos, the longest serving teacher in Waverley history who teaches Ancient Egypt from his first-hand experience is walking quietly along the balcony when a comic genius of a student taps him on the shoulder then runs away, giggling as old man Frangos turns around to find no-one there. Well the old fella wasn't copping this sort of disrespect so he reported it to Acting Year Master EJC - then all hell breaks lose as Emilio comes down like a ton of bricks on the unsuspecting student.

"The man has been here 40 years and you tap him on the shoulder! 40 YEARS!!.....I wish you tapped me on the shoulder you piece of shit!!"

This "skitz" could be heard throughout the entire level and is clearly remembered now, nearly a decade later by probably everyone present....and will remain that way forever.

Later that same year in Class 8E(??) there was a young man commonly known as "The Alien" or also "Skelator", who now resides as a guest of Her Majesty at an undisclosed location. Well anyway, he upset EJC in a big way - even if none of us can remember the exact details. And Emilio's reaction went a bit like this....

"If you don't get a level...I'LL RESIGN"

Well luckily the young man did receive a Level (a Waverley style form of punishment), so EJC didn't have to carry through with his threat.

Moving on to the next year - Year 9 Religion class where many of those "Cesaro Moments" took place. It was the last period one Friday afternoon and EJC was in the middle of something very important when the bell sounded off, signalling the end of another day. This didn't seem to bother Cesaro, who just kept on talking away. Soon enough one student pointed out to EJC that "sir, the bell went". Well this was enough to send Emilio into a frenzy....

"The bell went.....DO YOU THINK I'M DEAF!!!! You started off alright, but now I dunno what's happened, you're just a Son of a Bitch!!!"

This statement has now become one of the most popular TTT quotes, although it is usually changed to:

"You used to be a good bloke!! Now you're a dickhead!!"

Which, although it is not the original version, actually sounds better.

But it's not only his uncontrollable temper that Emilio is remembered for....it's also his crazy, hilarious and surprisingly honest stories about his life. The humour lies not only in the stories themselves, but also in his unique way of telling them.

Most of the stories come from the Year 9 Religion class and include:

When he went to China - "Where all the cars go beep-beep-beep, and the bikes go ting-ting-ting"

When he used to go to the beach and everyone said "Here comes the big wog in his big woggy cozzies"

When he once smoked dope, and as his heart rate accelerated (don't deny it - you all know the feeling) he went...

"Oh Shit, Oh Shit, Oh Shit, Oh Shit, Oh Shit, Oh Shit, Oh Shit"

When he was 18 and he used to go "down the Ruggers" and "Kick out the flares" and his mates would "buy me doubles but I thought they were singles". This resulted in him "walking up the middle of Arden St" and "leaving my wallet on Coogee Oval". And once he got home making a bit of a mess "Number 1's, number 2's all over the bed"