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FATHERS ARE WONDERFUL PEOPLE
Fathers are wonderful people
Too little understood,
And we do not sing their praises
As often as we should.
For somehow, father seems to be
The man who pays the bills,
While Mother binds up little hurts
And nurses all our ills.
And Father struggles daily
To live up to "his image,"
As protector and provider
And "hero of the scrimmage."
And perhaps that is the reason
We sometimes get the notion,
That Fathers are not subject
To the thing we call emotion.
But if you look inside Dad's heart,
Where no one else can see ...
You'll find he's sentimental
And as "soft" as he can be.
But he's so busy every day
In the grueling race of life,
He leaves the sentimental stuff
To his partner and his wife.
But Fathers are just "wonderful"
In a million different ways,
And they merit loving compliments
And accolade of praise.
For the only reason Dad aspires
To fortune and success
Is to make the family proud of him,
And to bring them happiness.
And like our Heavenly Father,
He's a guardian and a guide,
Someone that we can count on
To be always on our side.
~ Helen Steiner Rice ~


The Saga of the Golf Ball
I am a little golf ball,
I come in many colours.
I'm hit by the great Greg Norman
and by ordinary fellas.
I am a little golf ball,
I sit on fancy tees.
I am smacked along the fairways,
sometimes, crashing into trees.
I am a little golf ball,
I lie buried in the sand.
I'm hit, pitched and chipped,
until on the green I land.
I am a little golf ball,
I lie upon the green.
They aim me for the mighty hole,
and rejoice when I'm not seen.
I am a little golf ball,
on famous courses I'm played.
I am not very camera shy,
for I'm all the time displayed.
I was a little golf ball,
before I got driven to the drink.
By some fool hardy amateur,
who just didn't think.
Now I am a forgotten golf ball,
no chance of a reviver.
I tell you what, if I come back,
I'd rather be a driver.
Copyright: Diane Merchant

I DID ALL THAT?
After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?"
"Yes," the golfer responded.
"Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?"
"Yes, I did. How did you know?" he asked.
"Well," said the policeman very seriously, "Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver's windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn't make it to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?"
The golfer thought it over carefully and responded...
"I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip, and lower my right thumb."
WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE....
A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in nine holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him.
To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn't hit the ball far, but plodded along consistently and didn't waste much time. Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the young man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball - and directly between his ball and the green.
After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot, the old man finally said, "You know, when I was your age, I hit the ball right over that tree."
With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung hard, hit the ball up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it thudded back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay.
The old man offered one more comment, "Of course, when I was your age, that pine tree was only three feet tall."
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