Dream of: 26 June 2012 "Completely Unaware"

concentrate on being aware

I was in a house where I was living with my mother and my father. Four or five children were also living there, so a total of around ten people were living in the house. I felt as if my parents had always wanted a big family, but I hadn't known that they wanted this many.

Although my father was presently in the house, he was either in the process of moving out or he had already moved out. Probably he wasn't going to stay there anymore.

My mother and I left in a car which she drove erratically to downtown Portsmouth. Since I badly needed to urinate, I seized a large white plastic cup, pulled out my penis and peed right there in front of her. When my mother started trying to park the car, I quickly opened the door and poured the urine out on the curb.

She experienced substantial difficulty parking the car and backed into a big white sign. I had told her that she was going to hit the sign even before it happened. As she tried to negotiate out of her predicament, several parked cars obtrusively impeded her progress. She was imminently close to one car - I told her she was about a half inch away. I also did not think she could see a big red car parked along my passenger side. When she finally managed to extricate herself from the predicament, I stepped out of our car, said that I simply couldn't handle it, and started walking away. Many people, including policemen, were standing around the area.

My mother circled around and returned to where I was on the corner of Chillicothe and Sixth Street, right in the middle of downtown Portsmouth. Almost as soon as I saw her again, I saw that the police had seized her and accompanied her into a small downtown store. I thought about simply walking away, but I knew I couldn't do that: I had to go help her. When I walked into the store, it looked as if the police had already accompanied her downstairs. I stood on the first floor and told a young policeman (perhaps only 20 years old) that she had Alzheimer's and that I couldn't understand why they were arresting her for the innocuous incident outside. He pointed to the counter to a stack of perhaps 100 pale-blue papers which looked like sticky-notes and he indicated that all those papers were tickets - apparently for my mother.

I couldn't believe it. I picked up the stack and started looking through them. When I saw that some papers simply seemed to have writing on them of phone calls which my mother had made to the police station, I told the policeman that not all the papers were tickets. He did not seemed to be particularly concerned about the tickets and he simply seemed to be indicating that a problem existed. I was indeed surprised, however, to discover that my mother had so many tickets about which I had been completely unaware. A couple times, I explained, "She's got Alzheimer's."

Another grizzle-faced woman (perhaps 70) years old walked up. For a moment, I thought she resembled Christa (A German-American woman who met my father in Portsmouth in 1984 or 1985 and formed a long-term relationship with him, Christa separated from my father in the spring of 2000 after my father met my second step-mother. Christa died in 2008 in Portsmouth.) Referring to me, the woman whispered to the policeman, "Who's that?"

Perceiving the woman's uncertainty whether I should be looking at the blue papers, I gulped, "I'm her son."

It looked as if they were going to allow me to try to help my mother.

I knew my mother shouldn't be driving, but I hadn't ridden with her for a long time, so I hadn't known that her driving would be that bad. Apparently her Alzheimer's-afflicted mind was deteriorating.

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