Dream of: 28 June 2007 "Against No Assets"

I had gone to see Carolina, and while I was visiting her, her husband (a black-haired man about 40 years old) showed up. An altercation between him and me ensued and he pulled out a gun and shot me in the arm. The bullet went right through my arm, causing only a small wound. I still didn't leave and he pulled out a shotgun. He shot me twice with the shotgun, only causing flesh wounds.

Another fellow (thin, about 40 years old) showed up. He looked a bit like the character Kwai Chang Caine (played by the actor David Carradine in the television series "Kung Fu") and he tried to break up the fight.

While Carolina's husband continued to point the shotgun at me, I grabbed the gun, twisted it around toward him, and while he wasn't paying attention, I pulled the trigger. As we were standing on some steps in the hallway, even as he was still holding the gun, I shot him and I thought I had killed him.

All of us thought he was dead. Carolina had been taking care of my wounds, being very solicitous, but now she ran over to her husband. I looked at the other fellow and I told him that he had seen it all and that I had acted in self-defense. He didn't respond.

Somebody knocked on the door at the bottom of the steps. I opened the door and saw policemen standing outside. They said they thought they had better come. I looked back at Carolina's husband. He was clearly alive, moving his eyes and sitting up. I was relieved.

I wondered if I should now leave or stick around. I imagined myself going off and leaving Carolina, perhaps not seeing her for 20 years. After all that time, when we were old, I could return and tell her the story of my life. I wondered if she would even be interested in hearing my story at that point.

I decided I was indeed going to leave. I was going to leave everything, renounce everything. I would go off by myself. The other fellow who had shown up said, "Its a shame to leave against no assets."

I understood what he meant. I heard somebody say the phrase meant it was a shame to leave without having something to come back to. I corrected the person and said the phrase did not mean that at all. The phrase meant it was a shame to leave with no assets because assets could be a source of temptation. The proper idea was to overcome the temptation of returning to one's assets. If one had assets, one would be tempted to return, ant it was the overcoming of the temptation to return which was most important.

I still wasn't certain, but I thought I would just leave everything behind and go off by myself.

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