Dream of:
27 May 2007 "Connected By Association"My father, my sister, and I were sitting on the front porch of the Gallia County Farm. Abruptly I realized I hadn't been paying attention to whether the trees had been cut down on the Farm, even though I had heard about the tree-cutting. I looked around from the vantage point of the porch, but I didn't see many fallen trees. Some trees were lying on the ground, but many were still standing.
After my father, my sister and I boarded some kind of vehicle which my father was driving, we headed toward the old swimming hole, and I began to see the devastation, including huge trees lying on the hillside above the swimming hole. My father headed down a road behind the Farm to an area which I had never seen. On the way, I told him that greed had driven him to destroy the Farm.
We reached a quaint hilltop area where I had never been. When I saw a house with a red roof off in the distance, I realized I was looking at the far-away Farmhouse. I surveyed the surrounding tree-covered hillsides and saw some patches of trees which had all turned brown. I asked my father if the lumbermen who had come in to cut the trees had also sprayed the trees. He answered, "Yes."
I realized the brown trees were on the Farm. I couldn't understand why the lumbermen had sprayed whole areas and killed all the trees. As I looked at the devastation of the Farm, I became angrier and angrier. I looked at my father and told him phrases had been recurring in my mind lately. I said the phrases, "Money is your God" and "You worship money" and a third phrase, "You are evil" had been coming into my mind about my father.
I continued. I wanted to start telling him what I really thought about things. I told him he had cut the trees for my step-mother, and my step-mother was a whore. I thought those words would bother him, but he seemed unphased. I told him I had most difficulty believing he had let my step-mother's son Alex go up to the Farm and cut the trees. My father's actions seemed unconceivable. He mentioned that he had made one million dollars from the timber on the Farm and that Alex had made five hundred thousand. I told him the lumber on the Farm had been worth much more than that. If he had done it right, he probably could have received four or five million for it.
He seemed to be in his own little world. Nothing seemed to be bothering him and he continued driving without paying any attention to what I was saying.
We reached a picturesque little village, stopped the car, and stepped out. Right next to us was a barn. A tractor slowly began coming out of the open barn door, but no one was on the tractor, even though I knew that Alex was somehow guiding the tractor. Even though I couldn't see Alex, I hollered out to him. I wanted to confront him about his role in cutting the timber on the Farm and maybe even have a fight with him. My father said something about Alex, intimating that Alex was really stupid, that his head was almost hollow with no brain in it. I found his comments strange since my father had entrusted Alex with timber on the Farm. Apparently, however, my father had learned that Alex couldn't be trusted. Alex had taken advantage of my father and now my father was having severe regrets about what he had done.
My father and I became separated and I walked around for a while in the little village. I wanted to find a better viewpoint from where I could see the Farm. As I walked past little shops on the fairy-tale street, I lost my way. When I spotted a little shop which appeared to be a bar, I walked into the rustic room. About 10 people were standing around. They looked intelligent, as if this were some sort of resort area. They all turned their heads and focused on me. One fellow walked up, did a little dance in front of me and asked me what I wanted. I asked if he had any brown beer. I also asked if I could buy beer in a cup, carry it around and drink it on the streets. He wasn't sure, but he seemed to think it was permitted. I asked him to give me my beer in a cup. I intended to take it with me and drink it outside.
This bar seemed like an interesting place to get to know people. I thought I could tell them I was the son of the man who owned the Farm where all the trees had been cut, but I was ashamed of that fact and I didn't want to bring it up. I didn't want to be connected by association with my father. I picked up my beer and headed out.
Copyright 2011 by luciddreamer2k@gmail.com
