Dream of: 01 January 2005 "A Grecian Urn"

I was riding a train in Germany. I had been there a few days and I was planning to stay quite a while. An attractive woman (probably in her late 20s) was sitting next to me on my right. She and I had become quite friendly and we were having a long conversation when I became aware that I had an erection -- not only an erection, my penis was sticking out of my unzippered pants. I didn't do anything about it at first, but finally I said something and the woman looked as if she had been aware of it all along and simply hadn't said anything. I put my penis back in my pants and zipped up. However the bulge was still there. I told the woman I wasn't sexually aroused, I simply couldn't get rid of this erection. She didn't criticize me and we continued our conversation. 

She handed me a volume of Encyclopedia Britannia. I thought I might be able to hold the book in front of my erection if we had to stand to get off train. She said she had been looking in the encyclopedia for the entry on John Keats and she asked me if I knew who John Keats was. I smugly thought to myself that I knew who Keats was and I mentioned to her that he had written "Ode to a Grecian Urn." I thought I might even know a few lines from the poem and I hoped she was duly impressed. I began leafing through the book looking for Keats. 

Another fellow (probably in his mid 20s) stepped up looking for a seat. At first I thought he was Anderson, but looking closer, I realized he wasn't Anderson. He sat down in a seat behind us. A second fellow nearby began talking about how he loved Germany and he pointed out the window to a German town sitting on a high hill in the distance. It looked beautiful. He said when he had first arrived, his plane had landed in that town and he loved it there. 

Suddenly my father (only about 40 years old) stepped up in the aisle next to me. He was thin and in good shape. I could hardly believe he was there -- I certainly hadn't expected him. He got right to the point. He said I would need to remove all my things from the Gallia County Farm tomorrow. I was flabbergasted because I had stored a lot of things on the Farm. He and I hadn't been getting along well lately, but I hadn't expected him to do anything like this. He said he and my step-mother had already stacked all my things together in one spot and he intimated that if I did not get them tomorrow, he would destroy them. 

This seemed so despicable to me. I tried to explain that I wasn't going back to the United States for quite a while. I certainly didn't see how I could buy a plane ticket and fly back tomorrow. But he was adamant. I tried to decide whether it was even worth it to go back. Maybe it would be better to just let him destroy everything. I knew he and I would never reconcile. I leaned over toward him and whispered, "You bastard." 

He looked surprised and angry. I immediately regretted what I had said, not because I was sorry I had said it (because I believed it was true and that he was an evil man), but because I knew he would now retaliate against me like he always did if he was offended. I just wished I didn't have to be around him anymore; but I hated to see my possessions on the Farm destroyed.

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