Dream of: 26 August 2003 "Alienated"

Hundreds  of  lawyers  had assembled in the  middle  of downtown Portsmouth,  in  the esplanade area. I had also arrived  at  the assembly, uncertain of its purpose, curious. Beaty (an old law school classmate whom I hadn't seen in years) showed up  by my  side and  we began talking. She was thin, sported cropped blonde hair, glasses, and looked in her early 30s. She told me she was handling a case for the prosecutor's office. I  goadingly inquired further, barely suppressing my disdain for prosecution attorneys, and she somewhat abashedly admitted that she now worked for the prosecutor. Even though I held such low esteem for prosecuting attorneys, I wondered what working as a prosecutor would be like I would need to learn quite a bit  of new  law. What was the difference between misdemeanor theft  and felony theft? Maybe I could ask Beaty.

A  wave of turbulence passed over the throng of lawyers   something to do with flags. At least two flags were flying in the tall buildings surrounding the esplanade one flag on one side of the esplanade and another flag on the other. One flag apparently had been created during the American  Civil War. A dispute  had  arisen among the lawyers as to which flag was  the proper  flag.  

As the crowd swayed from one side  to the  other, Beaty and I were pushed along in the current. Someone grabbed  me by the wrist, pulling me; I in turn grabbed Beaty's hand, and as soon  as I could, I pulled her over to the side. The  person  who had grabbed my wrist let go and disappeared in the throng. I somewhat  reluctantly released Beaty's soft hand I  barely knew  her; yet maybe I would become better acquainted  with her.

As she looked around at the faces in the crowd,  she mentioned that Austin had been invited to this assembly. I knew that I had  gone to high school with Austin and that he had later become a lawyer; but I wondered why he had received an invitation and  I hadn't. Oh well, it didn't matter much; I was  a  lawyer and  I had as much right as any other lawyer to be  here.  

Beaty  walked  away from me, perhaps 10 meters, as if  she were looking  for something. I was about to follow her when  I noticed that she was doing some intricate ballet movements, as if she were practicing  a  dance. Not wanting to interrupt her, I stood  to  the side and watched. I felt isolated, alienated, not part of what was happening around me. Yet here I was, whether I belonged here or not.

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