Dream of: 21 January 2002 (2) "In The Wilderness"

My father, my sister, a couple other people and I were on a hiking survival trip and were staying in a cave far out in the wilderness. We were sleeping in the cave, when I suddenly awoke in the middle of the night. My sister (lying not far from me) was awake. I recalled she and I had been having a dispute and weren't getting along. It would be nice if we could simply hold each other in our arms and rub our cheeks together. I doubted, however, that would happen. Instead, I felt as if I simply needed to get away from everyone.

I stood up and I picked up two thick books out of a box sitting in the cave. One book was The Iliad by Homer. I turned to my sister, said goodbye and walked out. When I was outside of the cave, I could hear my sister trying to awaken my father by calling, "Daddy! Daddy!."

I knew they would be lost in the wilderness without me. I started walking down a path, thinking I simply wanted to go off into the wilderness by myself to be alone. At the same time, I simply couldn't bring myself to abandon the others, so I stopped and stood for a while.

Soon my father came driving in a convertible car with my sister and the other people inside. I knew something had changed, because we hadn't been in a car before. My father stopped and began talking. He said we needed to return home now because we had been out here so long and he had already spent about $200,000 in the last month. I thought he might have lost some of that money in the stock market. I felt a bit sorry for him because I thought he would probably stay out there if it wasn't costing him so much money. The lack of money was forcing him to leave.

After they drove off, I stood debating whether I wanted to go into the wilderness by myself or whether I was going to turn around and also return home.

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