Dream of: 24 May 2001 "Nature Revealed Her Saddened Eyes"

I was in my last year of high school. It was finals time, and I was counting up how many finals I needed to pass to graduate: two math classes, a chemistry class and one other class. But I had long ago quit going to the chemistry class and I had already missed the final. I had already taken one math test and I still had one math test yet to take; and I now I realized it was imperative that I pass the next math final, scheduled for the following Monday (today was Saturday). I was thinking of going to Buckner's house in Portsmouth and studying with him. But I realized my chances of passing the math test at this point were almost zero. Therefore, I wouldn't graduate unless I returned to school for another year; and I didn't intend to do that. I already had a college degree and a law degree and I was just going back to high school to get a degree which I had never obtained, but I didn't really need. I could obtain a GED if necessary, but I doubted I would even do that. My father and my mother hadn't been keeping track of me lately: they had their own problems. So they probably wouldn't even be aware I had flunked out of high school.

Nevertheless, even though the situation seemed hopeless, I opened my math book and began studying. But, the math problems were actually problems in English grammar. I began going over some simple problems of how to use the subjunctive mood, specifically, some examples of whether to use "become" or "becomes", or whether to use "can" or "could" in a subjunctive clause. I thought about the word "could", whether it was a past tense of "can" or a subjunctive form of "can."

Finally, I began reviewing examples of verbs being used as modifiers, and I saw the mood of the verb made a difference; the mood determined whether the verb was a happy verb or a sad verb. Suddenly, a sentence popped into my mind: "Nature revealed her saddened eyes." The critical word in the sentence was "saddened." By looking at the examples, I had learned the proper word to use in this sentence was "saddened" instead of "sad." I said the sentence over and over; the sentence sounded so much better when the word "saddened" was used instead of "sad."

I wanted to learn more. My head was full of grammar examples, and I wanted to show what I had learned to a friend of mine: a girl of high school age. She was sitting nearby in a field, and I walked over to her. I knelt on my knees in front of her and said, "I actually learned something."

Black-haired, she was thin and very pretty. She had the same book I had been using. I said to her, "I don't care about the test anymore, but I do want to learn this stuff."

I leaned over and touched my lips to hers; we didn't actually kiss, but the feel of her lips on mine was very pleasant.

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