Dream of: 07 April 1998 "The Lord At Bay"
The vehicle in which I was riding seemed like a bus, but had the characteristics of a roller coaster, including being open to the air with no top or sides. I was sitting between two people, a man on my left and a woman on my right, riding parallel to the Ohio River, which could be viewed off to the right. Our journey was leading us to a colossal dam on the river, which loomed up ahead of us. But just before reaching the dam, we picked up speed, racing downhill like a roller coaster in a huge dip. Unlike the seats of a roller coaster, however, our seats weren't equipped with any bars or straps to hold us in. The woman on my right became nervous and made a move as if she were going to scoot closer to me for protection. But I cautioned her to stay put, that it would be too dangerous to move while we were moving so fast. She stayed in her seat, and we made it safely to the bottom.
Now we were close enough to the dam to clearly see its face, parts of which were covered with gigantic pieces of cloth. One by one the cloths started falling away, obviously on our behalf, to reveal large snow-white busts of famous men, as huge as those on Mount Rushmore, carved on the front of the dam. Nine or ten of the faces adorned the dam, the last face being that of Abraham Lincoln. It was a spectacularly impressive sight.
Our journey continued until we reached our destination, a ski resort where everyone intended to go skiing. However as soon as we had debarked, I separated myself from the others and made my way over to a nearby barn-like structure filled with hay. I had been here before and was familiar with the barn. Entering, I began climbing up through the hay, completely covered by it. I pushed upward until I found what I was seeking – a small room-like area arranged in the middle of the hay. Other people, indistinct, were here waiting for me.
As I spoke to the others, I could see myself. I was a black man, troubled by my present job. I was working undercover as a narcotics agent, planning to bust someone who had been on the bus with me. But I was a crooked agent, because I used drugs myself. Right now I was getting ready to take some drugs. In my hand I was holding a tiny piece of white cardboard paper, perhaps a centimeter square. On top of the paper were a few drops of a clear liquid viscous substance, with some black peppery specs in it. The substance resembled some poison I had recently set out to kill ants. But the substance I had was a powerful hallucinogenic drug.
No sooner had I taken the drug than I knew this was going to be a nightmarish experience. I immediately seemed immobilized, as if I couldn't move. I was powerless to avoid facing whatever was about to happen to me, and I knew it was going to be terrible. I gradually began to realize that two young girls, not more than four years old had materialized in front of me, profanely proclaiming that I was going to "fuck" them. I was unable to move or control my body, and began to worry that they might take off their clothes and push my fingers into their hairless vaginas. I experienced intense mental pain at the thought of such a prospect. This was an extreme nightmare, one which seemed to have been cagily constructed to torment me. I seemed to be confronted with the most despicable and unforgivable act that I could commit.
Suddenly I began singing. My first words were just a little chant like something Irish or Hawaiian, something like, "Oh lie oh lee oh lie oh lay." Then I sang, "I always thought I'd keep the Lord at bay, when suddenly he's on my back."
The meaning of my little song disturbed me profoundly.
Copyright 2001 by luciddreamer2k@gmail.com
