Dream of: 25 March 1998 "Cold Feet"

My life was bogged down — I wasn't doing anything with myself. I had never even moved away from home, but was still living with my mother. I had no prospects and little future. I couldn't even think straight. My mind seemed dull and groggy, unable to focus.

I was sitting upright, with my legs hanging over the edge of something, but I was unsure where I was. I also noticed my feet were cold, almost freezing. Suddenly I awoke. I realized that everything I had been thinking had been a dream, and that I should probably write it down. I would then probably post the dream on the Internet, where I knew it would be read by many people. I wondered if everyone would think it were true I was still living with my mother. Maybe even Donna (who had been reading my dreams on the Internet) would conclude I had moved back in with my mother. I knew, of course, that I wasn't living with my mother. But I wondered why I would have dreamed such a thing. It must mean something.

I was still very sleepy and wanted to snooze some more. I knew I was sitting outside on a concrete porch, with my legs hanging over the edge. I had been lying on the porch and sleeping before, and I wondered how I had come to be in a sitting position. Another boy who seemed to be related to me was also lying asleep on the porch. I lay back down, completely covered myself with warm brown leaves and tried to fall back to sleep.

Just as I was about to doze off, I heard my mother calling me. She sounded worried about something, and I tried to answer her, but I was having trouble emitting any sounds, and only a muffled grunt came out of my mouth. I could feel that my mother was close to me, but I was afraid she wouldn't see me because of the leaves. Suddenly, however, I felt her hands on my hands. I was lying on my back, so my hands were resting on my stomach – she had reached through the leaves and touched me. But her hands were so bony-cold and clammy, I suddenly realized the person wasn't my mother at all, but someone who intended to harm me. My voice came back to me and I hollered out, "Help! Help!"

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