Dream of: 07 March 1998 "Numb"

It was morning and I was still lying in bed in the Gallia County Farmhouse. I had spent the night in an upstairs bedroom and I had dallied about getting up, even though I knew it was rather late. When I heard a car pull up outside, I suspected my mother and my father were arriving. Since I didn't want to still be in bed when they came in, I jumped up and began dressing.

I pulled on my pants and hurried downstairs, looking for a burgundy tee shirt. I was just able to pull on the tee shirt before both my father and mother walked into the living room. I acted as if I had been up for a while, and told them I was looking for my pet Dalmatian Picasso. Normally Picasso slept with me, but only now did I realize he hadn't been with me last night. I was unsure where he could be. I couldn't even remember for sure whether I had brought him there to the Farm with me.

When my mother saw I was looking for Picasso, a strained look fell over her face. She mumbled out some words, among which was "Genesis," and "cemetery." I didn't understand her at first, but finally I realized she was telling me that Picasso had been hit by a car and killed, that a service had been performed during which some verses from the book of "Genesis" had been read, and that Picasso had already been buried. Apparently the accident had taken place on the street behind the Grandview Avenue House.

I was stunned by the news. I felt like screaming, but no words came. I experienced a pain difficult to describe, more as if I were numb, as if I weren't feeling anything at all, as if I were devoid of feeling. I wanted to scream out and blame somebody, but I said nothing. I just couldn't believe I would never see Picasso again. The thought was almost unbearable.

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