Dream of: 29 September 1997 "Toys"

I was with Jerry Seinfeld, in an apartment where Jerry was living. The place was different from the apartment inhabited by Jerry on his television sitcom "Seinfeld." Yet it was still about the same size, and had the same ambiance as the apartment in the sitcom.

It wasn't long before Jerry's friend George Costanza (the character played by the actor Jason Alexander on "Seinfeld") showed up. George began talking about Jerry's other friend, Elaine (the character played by the actress Julia Louis-Dreyfus on "Seinfeld"), and quickly informed us that he (George) had played a trick on a boyfriend of Elaine. George was carrying a large object which he thought was the motor of the car of Elaine's boyfriend. As a trick, George had taken the motor from the boyfriend's car. Or at least that was what George had thought he had done. But after George had set the object on the floor, and I had a chance to study it, I discovered that it wasn't a car motor at all. Instead it was an extremely long chain-saw – about two meters long. It had a huge blade and two motors, both painted bright red. I thought George had probably just grabbed the saw out of the boyfriend's car, thinking he had grabbed the motor. I told him the saw probably indicated that the boyfriend was some huge muscular lumberjack who would be quite upset when he discovered that his chain saw was missing. When George realized what he had done, he became visibly upset.

Eventually Elaine herself showed up. And finally another fellow arrived. The new fellow wasn't a member of Jerry's clique of friends, but he was going to have a meal with them. I noticed that the new fellow had about the same build and about the same color of hair as Jerry.

As it turned out, Jerry and his friends had also played a trick on this fellow. In fact it seemed that Jerry and his friends were always playing tricks on people. As part of this particular trick, Jerry and his friends had stolen some toys which had belonged to this fellow, and the toys had been brought here to Jerry's apartment. Now that the trick had been revealed to the fellow, the toys were going to be returned. However, the fellow's toys had been mixed in with Jerry's toys, and now needed to be separated. All the toys were stacked neatly in a pile along one side of the room. I also realized some of my toys were mixed in with the pile of toys.

Since all the others were getting ready to go into the kitchen (in an adjoining room) and eat their meal, the fellow turned to me and asked me if I would separate his toys out of the pile while they ate. I didn't mind, and as the rest of the party retired to the kitchen, I began sorting through the pile of toys, trying to figure out which toys belonged to the fellow and which ones didn't. As I proceeded, I realized the task was far more daunting and confusing than I had originally anticipated.

Finally the fellow walked back into the room to examine my progress. He seemed indignant that I hadn't yet completed the task. He stepped right up in my face and began spouting off orders about how I should sort the toys. I immediately became angry and shouted back, "Fuck you! I'm not doing it!"

I backed away from him, determined that I wasn't going to help. He turned on his heel and rushed back to the kitchen, obviously to tell Jerry what had happened. I felt bad because I had originally promised him that I would pick up his toys for him. But I certainly wasn't going to help someone who was going to act like that.

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