Dream of: 28 May 1995 "Leacy And The Little Girl"

As I was standing on the banks of the Ohio River, I saw some people I knew in trouble on the other side. They seemed like members of my family, but they also reminded me of the Cartwright brothers from the television series "Bonanza." I knew I had to swim the river to them to help them. I pondered an instant whether I should take off my tennis shoes, quickly decided to wear them, and waded out into the water.

As I began swimming, I saw how choppy the water was and felt the force of the current. I also felt the weight of the tennis shoes, and felt more as if I were in a vertical rather than horizontal position as I used my arms to swim through the water. Sometimes when I became tired I rested a bit by swimming on my back. At times the situation seemed desperate, but I never gave up hope I would have the strength to make it to the other side, and finally I touched shore.

I immediately saw my friends were having trouble breaking off two small trees. I quickly joined in their effort and began twisting a small tree until it broke off near the base. I did the same to another tree, and that seemed to solve their problem.

They were now ready to accompany me to a house where a group of my relatives had gathered, apparently to welcome me home from prison, where I had been incarcerated for quite a while. When we arrived at the house, I talked with my second cousin Jeff for a while. He asked me whether I was writing children's books, or whether I was making a movie. Apparently I had discussed those subjects with him once before. I had the feeling he wanted to know because he would like to work with me on something. I asked him what he was doing now, and he gave some vague answer.

I left Jeff and walked around the house. I was surprised to find two small Dalmatians and began petting them. I slowly realized one of the Dalmatians was a dog named Dac which I had had many years ago which had disappeared. Although it had been so long ago, the dog seemed to still recognize me and I happily petted it and hugged it close to me.

Finally I stood up and circulated among the other people. My grandmother Mabel and my step-grandfather, Clarence, were there, as well as my mother. But I didn't see my grandmother Leacy anywhere. When I finally asked where she was, I was shocked to learn she had died. With a tear in my eye I began inquiring when she had died and learned it had been nine weeks earlier. It took a while for that knowledge to sink into my mind. I finally realized while I had been in prison my family had deceived me into thinking Leacy was still alive. Some of my family had even visited me while I had been in prison, and no one had ever said anything to me.

At first I thought I wouldn't say anything about having been deceived. But finally I stood up and announced to everyone that I thought they had betrayed me by leading me to believe that Leacy had been alive all this time. I finished by saying, "Of course I'm just a convict," as if to say that they had no respect for me and had shown it by not being honest with me. I then turned and left the house.

***

I was walking down a snow-covered country lane which seemed near Patriot. Ahead of me I saw a small brown house or log cabin, and I recalled that I had once before met the people who lived there. I suddenly recalled something else: these people raised bears.

Suddenly on both sides of me, behind wire fences, I saw huge groups of bears, probably a hundred on each side. The bears ran up to the flimsy fences, and I was suddenly very scared, almost in a panic. Clearly if the bears came over the fences, I wouldn't have a chance.

However, I quickly regained my composure. I realized my only chance was to remain calm and try to slowly walk back out the same way I had walked in. But suddenly I heard a shot ring out close to the house. When I looked and saw no one there, I concluded it must have been a booby trap which the owners had rigged to scare off anyone who came too close to the house. That didn't help me, and I continued retracing my steps.

But now I saw another problem. Straight ahead of me were two bears which were blocking my path. I saw that the bears were each wearing a collar and were chained to the fence. If I didn't get too close to them, they wouldn't be able to attack me. However, I couldn't continue down the path with them in my way. I backed up and saw a large stick. Just as I picked it up and was going to turn back to the bears, I saw someone come from behind the house.

It was a young blonde girl probably about eight or nine years old, and she was riding a small tractor or four-wheeler or perhaps a snowmobile. As she approached me, it seemed clear that she was going to be able to get me out of this predicament, and I hopped onto the back of the tractor. She headed right between the two bears on chains. I exchanged a few words with her and she indicated that she wasn't afraid of the bears. I said, "They scare me to death."

When we stopped, it seemed as if we might be in the village of Patriot. I jumped off the tractor, and when I turned back to thank her, I was shocked to see that the tractor had overturned into a ditch. I immediately began trying to lift it up. I couldn't see the girl and was afraid that she had been crushed underneath it. But when I straightened the tractor up, I was surprised to find that the girl had completely disappeared.

What had happened to her? Had someone grabbed her? Or had a bear carried her off when my back was turned? What should I do now? I was afraid that someone might try to blame me for the girl's disappearance. Perhaps I should deny that I had even been to the house. But I knew I had left my footprints there in the snow. I couldn't deny that I had been there. I was unsure what I would do.

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