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Dream of: 09 May 1994 "Don't Go Out On Me"

Brian had invited me to a party being held at the apartment of someone we knew. When we arrived, not many people were present, but soon quite a large number of people arrived. Most people were standing outside the apartment in a large area with a cement floor. As I walked around among them, I slowly realized only males were present. Most, like Brian, seemed to be in their late 20s, and all, like Brian, were neatly dressed and had short hair. Brian had even brought a tie and had put it on just before we reached the apartment.

The party didn't seem like much fun to me. People were standing around softly speaking to each other. Some music was playing low in the background. I thought to myself I would like to hear Pearl Jam's song "Don't Go Out On Me" come suddenly blasting out. That might liven things up a little.

I looked for Brian, thinking I would like to leave. I didn't think I really fit in. I remembered having recently attended another party to which I had invited a friend to accompany me. He had blond hair which hung over his ears. I remembered how out of place he had looked, since everyone else at the party had had short, well-coifed hair.

I felt out of place here. Although I didn't think I stood out because of my looks, I didn't think I related with these people. Brian seemed to fit in okay. I wondered what it was that I had in common with Brian. Suddenly I remembered that I used to tell Brian some of my dreams, and I realized Brian enjoyed hearing my dreams. That came as a bit of a revelation to me.

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