About 20 people and I were sitting in somewhat of a circle around the sides of a room. I was looking at the other people through a small device which I was holding in my hands. But sometimes I would just hold my fingers together and look at the other people through my fingers. As I sat here, it slowly came to me that I had only recently discovered that I had AIDS. I still felt strong and I didn't yet have any of the symptoms; but I knew that at some point I would start feeling ill and finally die.
Meanwhile, all the people in the room were going to be involved in some kind of activity together. The man in charge of coordinating the activity called out my name and mentioned that I had some kind of disease. He then asked me what the disease was. I really didn't want to say that I had AIDS, but I thought the man probably already knew anyway. Finally he deduced from the way I was acting that I had AIDS and he said something about it. After that I thought the others might be afraid to be around me and might not want me to take part in the planned activity.
***
The people who had been in the room with me and I were on a bus together. However now most of the people appeared to be small children. Most were sitting up front close to the bus driver. We were now in Europe. I still knew I had AIDS but I now thought I would live out the rest of my life in Europe. I had always wanted to live in Europe.
As we rode along, I could see a city on top of a nearby mountain. I knew we were in Germany, and I thought the name of the city was Konigsburg. I could see a large castle in the city. It seemed to me that I had once been in the city and had lived there for a while and I thought it was called Munchen, although I knew it wasn't Munich. I thought the city had changed because it appeared that some kind of permanent fair had been constructed in the city. I could see a gigantic Ferris wheel. I also saw two wires in the middle of the Ferris wheel. Some person's feet were connected to the wires so the person could slide back and forth on the wires. As the Ferris wheel moved, the person slid back and forth. The person was very high on the Ferris wheel and I thought how scary it must be to be up there like that. I thought I definitely wouldn't want to be up there. However I thought I would like to live out the rest of my life in a town like that in Germany.
As we continued along, I noticed that the bus was traveling very fast, and I thought that buses in Europe traveled fast like that. I wondered what it would be like for me if we crashed. I noticed that the gears of the bus were right between my legs. I was in the front of the bus. I thought about how the gears would smash me if we crashed. I was hoping that wouldn't happen.
Copyright 2004 by luciddreamer2k@gmail.com
